^LJ

I know it sucks.

Boukra’s Son

A baby is born, this baby is Ai-Wahed.
…Meanwhile, in the city of Kanassa an army of Azale is destroying all life. The Azale are thieves. They use their great fighting abilities to takeover cities and sell them to the highest bidder. The Azale are a ruthless group of people, none stand in their way.
The next morning, the people of Kanassa are destroyed, no match for the powerful Azale. The Azalies are celebrating their victory and the birth of Ai-Wahed. Ai-Wahed is Boukra’s son, he is the greatest Azale.
“My son is worthless, I don’t care what happens to him!” Boukra states.
The other Azalies say nothing, however, they are disappointed with Boukra’s attitude.
Then, suddenly, one of the remaining Kanassians attack Boukra out of nowhere! But, Boukra’s men easily defeat him, but before he dies, he tells Boukra that he has given him psychic powers and is now able to see his people’s future. Boukra kills the Kanassian and passes out.
Boukra’s men place him in his bed for recovery. His men realize that they cannot wait for Boukra to become fully recovered before started their next mission. With that they head to Lahthan without him.
While Boukra is sleeping he has a dream about the future. He sees his people being annihilated and Ai-Wahed becoming more powerful. Boukra then wakes up and goes to catch up with his men. Before he leaves he checks Ai-Wahed’s strength. He is still very weak and realizes he is wasting his time and continues on.
Meanwhile, in Lahthan, Surur’s men are killing Gumaa, Boukra’s best friend. They finish him off as Boukra arrives. He sees his fallen men friend and the rest of his men all dead.
“Surur betrayed our alliance, gather up the remaining men and destroy him.” Gumma mutters.
Surur’s men notice Boukra and begin to fight him. Boukra outsmarts them all and kills them. Sahran, Surur’s right hand man, then comes out and nearly kills Boukra. Boukra gets lucky and finishes him off. Boukra quickly recovers and gets back on his horse and heads towards his hideout.
Boukra rides hard and can soon see Suror riding in the distant. Surur notices Boukra and begins to ride harder. Boukra stops by his hideout, where Ai-Wahed is sleeping, and has another vision of him. Boukra dismisses the vision and throws his son outside for dead because he is weak. He finds his men drinking at the bar.
“Surur betrayed us and has killed everyone but me, you must come with me and destroy him!” Boukra demands.
“Yeah right!”
“Oh yeah like we’re going to believe that.”
“Surur would never do that!”
Boukra now knows that he is the only one who can save his race. As he leaves for Aaeril, Surur’s hideout, he has another vision, but this time his son is a grown man, it then flashes to Surur destroying his people and that is the end of the vision.
Boukra arrives and immediately heads towards Surur’s chamber. Boukra is confronted by hundreds of men. However, through his anger and skill he defeats them all with ease. As Boukra enters Surur’s chamber there is an eerie silence, he has entered a trap. The doors all slam. Then Boukra has his final vision, Ai-Wahed is face to face with Surur before battle. He knows his son will one day defeat Surur. Then Boukra is destroyed as the room is filled with boiling oil. His hideout is ambushed and all of the people are killed. However, Ai-Wahed is spared because Surur’s men fail to notice him. Ai-Wahed overcomes his weaknesses and survives to one day avenge his people, just as his father envisioned.

Loki

er, nice arabic flavour to the story... but you kinda cut it a bit short, and you didnt really explain half of the background. for instance why did the man who attacked boukra give him psychic powers?

wrt grammer, two things. The story didnt really flow very well. Also, you should. stop. using. very. small. sentences. as. it. is. very. annoying. =)

but apart from that, good read, and i look forward to reading more from you.

Angel

Very creative. Good imagination.
As you grow, I hope you will share more.

__________________


In the depth of winter, I finally learned that there was within me an invincible summer.
~Albert Camus

^LJ

Yeah the story had to have an "arabian nights" twist on it...