Never choke in the south... - Tilted Forum Project Discussion Community

BigBen · 10-21-2005, 11:35 AM

Two hillbillies walk into a bar. While having a shot of whiskey, they talk about their moonshine operation. Suddenly, a woman at a nearby table, who is eating a sandwich, begins to cough. After a minute or so, it becomes apparent that she is in real distress.

One of the hillbillies looks at her and says "Kin ya swallar?" The woman shakes her head no.

'Kin ya breathe?" The woman begins to turn blue and shakes her head no.

The hillbilly walks over to the woman, lifts up the back of her dress, yanks down her drawers and quickly gives her right butt cheek a lick with his tongue. The woman is so shocked that she has a violent spasm and the obstruction flies out of her mouth. As she begins to breathe again, the hillbilly walks slowly back to the bar.

His partner says, Ya know, I'd heerd of that there 'Hind Lick Maneuver', but I ain't never seed nobody do it!"

maleficent · 10-21-2005, 11:39 AM

Cute... but for some reason, I'm getting a mighty big guffaw out of it because of the poster... In my head - -Ben has a cute l'il Canuckistani accent.. and having that pretent to have a southern accent makes the telling even funnier...

/me needs a life...

BigBen · 10-21-2005, 11:54 AM

Kanuckistani accent? I have no Idea what you are talking aboot...

Brewmaniac · 10-21-2005, 03:23 PM

Canuck=Canadian

Great joke! Thanks

SirLance · 10-21-2005, 03:43 PM

Tears are streaming down my face... good joke!

cellophanedeity · 10-21-2005, 05:14 PM

Very cute, but yeah, Mal, what's this Canuckistani accent you speak of?

maleficent · 10-24-2005, 05:25 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by cellophanedeity

Very cute, but yeah, Mal, what's this Canuckistani accent you speak of?

Y'all talk like Bob and Doug McKenzie doncha, eh?

(just teasin'...)

BigBen · 10-24-2005, 05:46 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Brewmaniac

Canuck=Canadian

Great joke! Thanks

Uh, yeah, I knew that. I was making another joke by spelling about as aboot...

Hmmmm. Not nearly as funny as I thought.

maleficent · 10-24-2005, 05:58 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by BigBen

Uh, yeah, I knew that. I was making another joke by spelling about as aboot...

Hmmmm. Not nearly as funny as I thought.

I got it... I laughed...

feelgood · 11-02-2005, 01:02 AM

I thought it was American's who can't get the word "about" right...

Canadian:"About!"
American: "A boat!"
C: "No! A-bout..."
A: "A...boat!"
C: "Fuck"

AndTylerToo · 11-02-2005, 08:01 PM

Hahaha, I'm pretty sure that its the other way around feelgood. But that may be because its coming from an American point of view, I don't really know.

Leto · 11-09-2005, 01:11 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by AndTylerToo

Hahaha, I'm pretty sure that its the other way around feelgood. But that may be because its coming from an American point of view, I don't really know.

nope. pretty sure it's feelgood's way. He Knows what he's talking aboot. er about. (you guys do say 'a boat')!!!

10-21-2005, 11:35 AM	#1 (permalink)
BigBen Comedian Location: Use the search button	Never choke in the south... Two hillbillies walk into a bar. While having a shot of whiskey, they talk about their moonshine operation. Suddenly, a woman at a nearby table, who is eating a sandwich, begins to cough. After a minute or so, it becomes apparent that she is in real distress. One of the hillbillies looks at her and says "Kin ya swallar?" The woman shakes her head no. 'Kin ya breathe?" The woman begins to turn blue and shakes her head no. The hillbilly walks over to the woman, lifts up the back of her dress, yanks down her drawers and quickly gives her right butt cheek a lick with his tongue. The woman is so shocked that she has a violent spasm and the obstruction flies out of her mouth. As she begins to breathe again, the hillbilly walks slowly back to the bar. His partner says, Ya know, I'd heerd of that there 'Hind Lick Maneuver', but I ain't never seed nobody do it!" __________________ 3.141592654 Hey, if you are impressed with my memorizing pi to 10 digits, you should see the size of my penis.

10-21-2005, 11:39 AM	#2 (permalink)
maleficent Junkie Moderator Emeritus Location: Chicago	Cute... but for some reason, I'm getting a mighty big guffaw out of it because of the poster... In my head - -Ben has a cute l'il Canuckistani accent.. and having that pretent to have a southern accent makes the telling even funnier... /me needs a life... __________________ Free your heart from hatred. Free your mind from worries. Live simply. Give more. Expect less.

10-21-2005, 11:54 AM	#3 (permalink)
BigBen Comedian Location: Use the search button	Kanuckistani accent? I have no Idea what you are talking aboot... __________________ 3.141592654 Hey, if you are impressed with my memorizing pi to 10 digits, you should see the size of my penis.

10-21-2005, 03:23 PM	#4 (permalink)
Brewmaniac Searching for the perfect brew!	Canuck=Canadian Great joke! Thanks __________________ "That's a joke... I say, that's a joke, son" Last edited by Brewmaniac; 10-21-2005 at 03:26 PM..

10-21-2005, 03:43 PM	#5 (permalink)
SirLance Junkie Location: In the middle of the desert.	Tears are streaming down my face... good joke! __________________ DEMOCRACY is where your vote counts, FEUDALISM is where your count votes.

10-21-2005, 05:14 PM	#6 (permalink)
cellophanedeity Heliotrope Location: A warm room	Very cute, but yeah, Mal, what's this Canuckistani accent you speak of?

11-02-2005, 01:02 AM	#10 (permalink)
feelgood Free Mars! Location: I dunno, there's white people around me saying "eh" all the time	I thought it was American's who can't get the word "about" right... Canadian:"About!" American: "A boat!" C: "No! A-bout..." A: "A...boat!" C: "Fuck" __________________ Looking out the window, that's an act of war. Staring at my shoes, that's an act of war. Committing an act of war? Oh you better believe that's an act of war

11-02-2005, 08:01 PM	#11 (permalink)
AndTylerToo Tilted Location: Ann Arbor, MI	Hahaha, I'm pretty sure that its the other way around feelgood. But that may be because its coming from an American point of view, I don't really know.