JohnnyCarson

A guy is driving around and he sees a sign in front of a house: "Talking
Dog For Sale."

He rings the bell, and the owner tells him the dog is in the backyard.

The guy goes into the backyard and sees a Labrador Retriever sitting
there.

"You talk?" he asks.

"Yep," the Lab replies.

"So, what's your story?"

The Lab looks up and says,

"Well, I discovered that I could talk when I was pretty young, and I
wanted to help the government; so I told the CIA about my gift, and in
no time at all they had me jetting from country to country, sitting in
rooms with spies and world leaders, because no one figured a dog would
be eavesdropping. I was one of their most valuable spies for eight years
running."

"But the jetting around really tired me out, and I knew I wasn't getting
any younger so I wanted to settle down. I signed up for a job at the
airport to do some undercover security work, mostly wandering near
suspicious characters and listening in. I uncovered some incredible
dealings and was awarded a batch of medals. I got married, had a mess of
puppies, and now I'm just retired."

The guy is amazed.

He goes back in and asks the owner what he wants for the dog.

"Ten dollars."

The guy says,

"This dog is amazing.

Why on earth are you selling him so cheaply?"

"Because he's a liar. He didn't do any of that stuff."

waxmax

That's a damn fine joke. I've heard it before but it's still in my top 10 favorites.

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Tape guns don't tape boxes. PEOPLE tape boxes.

itch vaccine

HAHAHA

that's good~

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"When you sit with a nice girl for two hours, it seems like two minutes.
When you sit on a hot stove for two minutes, it seems like two hours.
That's relativity."
- Albert Einstein

Brewmaniac

Clever joke! Thanks

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"That's a joke... I say, that's a joke, son"

superredhead

heh. everytime i think of a dog that could understand english i think of einstein from the book "the watchers"

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*yawn*