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#1 (permalink) |
The Griffin
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I Want A Raise
I, the Penis, hereby request a raise in salary for the following
reasons: I do physical labor. I work at great depths. I plunge head first into everything I do. I do not get weekends or public holidays off. I work in a damp environment. I work in a dark workplace that has poor ventilation. I work in high temperatures. My work exposes me to contagious diseases. Dear Penis, After assessing your request, and considering the arguments you have raised, the administration rejects your request for the following reasons: You do not work 8 hours straight. You fall asleep after brief work periods. You do not always follow the orders of the management team. You do not stay in your designated area and are often seen visiting other locations. You do not take initiative--you need to be pressured and stimulated in order to start working. You leave the workplace rather messy at the end of your shift. You don't always observe necessary safety regulations, such as wearing the correct protective clothing. You will retire well before you are 65. You are unable to work double shifts. You sometimes leave your designated work area before you have completed the assigned task. And if all this is not enough, you have been seen constantly entering and exiting the work place carrying two suspicious-looking bags. Sincerely, The Management |
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#3 (permalink) |
Tilted
Location: Illnois
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That was a funny one.... Thanks man you've made my day
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Evil Milkman: "So I wonder what it would taste like now?" Me: "Like a big floppy penis that hasn't been washed in a couple days." Last edited by Starfish; 12-06-2003 at 01:05 PM.. |
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#6 (permalink) |
Psycho
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Now that is precious. Too bad this is a template on which most supervisors (usually less educated and receive more pay that their team) will use to deny raises. I look forward to seeing this as the new company "you don't get a raise because" schtick. Nevertheless, this was SUPERB!!
~tommy
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...a wandering soul... |
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#11 (permalink) |
Upright
Location: Birch Bay (AKA Birch Gay)
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Oh man, the pair of suspicious looking bags threw me off guard. i love it. Thanks for sharing
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..«΄`.(*.Έ(`.Έ Έ.΄)Έ.*).΄`» ... «΄¨*.ΈΈ.* Kopfschuss *.ΈΈ.*¨`» ..«΄`.(Έ.΄(Έ.* *.Έ)`.Έ).΄`» ... ![]() ![]() |
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#28 (permalink) |
Tilted
Location: USA, Oregon
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Ha ha... very funny, I got a good laugh out of it.
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Happy Tree Friends... Its more fun than a stick. |
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