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Old 04-29-2003, 04:35 PM   #1 (permalink)
Loser
 
new Car for Daddy

just a sketch a wrote

A New Car for Daddy
Written by Anthony Fama
Lights
(Father and his young daughter are at the dinner table)
Father: I’m glad you were able to make it to this meeting Mary, as you are well aware we have a few things we need to discuss.
Mary: Have I been bad father?
Dad: No Mary, Not recently, but as you know the economy has been plunging into an everlasting world of doom. Now this may or may not be your fault Mary, but were not here to argue.
Mary: No father really! It’s only the effects of waging a 100 billion dollar war while promising massive tax cuts for the rich! I don’t even PAY taxes!
Father: Exactly! You don’t pay the bills mary. Sure the tax write off is great, but what have you done for me recently?
Mary: (she goes to respond but stops. Sadly replies) I see.
Father: Great! Now after tens of minutes discussion your mother and I have decided to sell you.
Mary: WHAT! I’ve been a bad girl haven’t I?
Father: not all the time mary, remember that tax write off we discussed? (mary looks confused) Besides, you don’t have to worry, we’ve got everything worked out. We’ve even found you a new home!
Mary: But what about my home here! I love you daddy! (she goes to hug father, but receives no such luck)
Father: Yes and we love you too honey. Your mother and I have been having a hard time with this too, it’s not exactly easy to sell a child. There are a lot of forms. We’re broken hearted dear. (mother enters with balloons)
Mother: Is she gone ye … (looks at mary) shit. (There is a knock at the door)
Father: well no time now! Your new father is here to rip you away to a great new home!
Mary: BUT …
Father: he’s a writer and a very good man. You’ll have a very happy home with him! (another knock at the door) His name is mister Jonathan Swift, he loves children, trust me you’ll be very happy! (mother opens the door, Swift enters with a fork and knife. Mother begins to push mary to swift) Oh and mary … (mother and father) HAPPY BIRTHDAY!
Mary: So I’m NOT being sold?
Father: Oh we’re still selling you mary, we just wanted you to really remember this!
Lights
dirtytony is offline  
Old 04-29-2003, 09:01 PM   #2 (permalink)
Crazy
 
Re: new Car for Daddy

Quote:
Originally posted by dirtytony
(mother enters with balloons)
Mother: Is she gone ye … (looks at mary) shit. (There is a knock at the door)
lol, this was the best part of the joke
just imaging what the mom said there...
moose is offline  
Old 04-30-2003, 03:05 AM   #3 (permalink)
Psycho
 
forgotten_dream's Avatar
 
Re: new Car for Daddy

Quote:
Originally posted by dirtytony
Father: he’s a writer and a very good man. You’ll have a very happy home with him! (another knock at the door) His name is mister Jonathan Swift, he loves children, trust me you’ll be very happy!
OH GOD!!! That's so awful!!!
__________________
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forgotten_dream is offline  
Old 04-30-2003, 03:46 AM   #4 (permalink)
Upright
 
"we just wanted you to really remember this!" pure evil=funnyness
bahula04 is offline  
 

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