The Mass of Hell - Tilted Forum Project Discussion Community

cabal0428 · 07-21-2003, 10:17 PM

The following is an actual question given on a University of Washington
(Huskies) chemistry midterm. The answer was so "profound" that the
professor shared it with colleagues, which is why we now have the pleasure
of enjoying it as well.

Bonus Question: Is Hell exothermic (gives off heat) or endothermic (absorbs
heat)?

Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyle's Law, (gas
cools off when it expands and heats up when it is compressed) or some
variant.

One student, however, wrote the following:

First, we need to know how the mass of Hell is changing with time. So we
need to know the rate at which souls are moving into Hell and the rate at
which they are leaving. I think that we can safely assume that once a soul
gets to Hell, it will not leave. Therefore, no souls are leaving.
As for how many souls are entering Hell, let's look at the different
religions that exist in the world today. Some of these religions state
that if you are not a member of their religions, and since people do not
belong to more than one religion, we can project that all souls go to Hell.

With birth and death rates as they are, we can expect the number of souls
in Hell to increase exponentially. Now, we look at the rate of change of
the volume in Hell. Because Boyle's Law states that in order for the
temperature and pressure in Hell to stay the same, the volume of Hell has
to expand as souls are added. This gives two possibilities:

1. If Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which
souls enter Hell, then the temperature and pressure in Hell will increase
until all Hell breaks loose.
2. Of course, if Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the
increase of souls in Hell, then the temperature and pressure will drop
until Hell freezes over. So which is it?

If we accept the postulate given to me by Ms. Teresa Banyan during my
Freshman year—"…that it would be a cold day in Hell before I sleep with
you.:-- and take into account the fact that I still have not succeeded in
having sexual relations with her, then #2 cannot be true; and thus I am
sure that Hell is exothermic and will not freeze.

The student Received the only "A" given.

plainoldbrent · 07-21-2003, 10:33 PM

haha, that's incredible

Slims · 07-21-2003, 10:50 PM

One of my physics teachers passed that out in class. It's still funny, thanks.

Ronin_Tiger · 07-22-2003, 12:49 AM

LOL. I loved it.

Sleepyjack · 07-22-2003, 01:25 AM

very good

Blue Fish · 07-22-2003, 08:26 AM

Heard it before but still got a laugh out of it

DynamicTopology · 07-22-2003, 08:36 AM

rofl great post

GM2 · 07-22-2003, 02:31 PM

Funny story, but by no means true.

CSflim · 07-22-2003, 02:35 PM

The author is among us.
no...really... Meridae'n wrote it. honest.

http://www.tfproject.org/tfp/showthr...threadid=14563

07-22-2003, 02:42 PM

lol funny

papermachesatan · 07-22-2003, 03:06 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by CSflim
The author is among us.
no...really... Meridae'n wrote it. honest.

http://www.tfproject.org/tfp/showthr...threadid=14563

He still has to be kicking himself for that one.

The Rogue · 07-22-2003, 03:09 PM

it's a brilliant answer, the guys a genious!

Regziever · 07-22-2003, 11:14 PM

Hehe! Awesome answer!

TerresqueÜ · 07-23-2003, 12:28 AM

Quite an amazing answer if I do say so myself.

cabal0428 · 07-23-2003, 09:41 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by CSflim
The author is among us.
no...really... Meridae'n wrote it. honest.

http://www.tfproject.org/tfp/showthr...threadid=14563

Ah but if we go farther...

Quote:

Originally posted by warrrreagl
Three of you at work, eh? I guess a representative of the Urban Legends website was one of the three, because your answer has been posted there for two years.
http://www.snopes.com/college/exam/hell.htm

CSflim · 07-23-2003, 03:38 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by cabal0428
Ah but if we go farther...

Hence the

!

kel · 07-23-2003, 04:08 PM

Need a good variant for "when pigs fly"

Meridae'n · 01-17-2005, 10:24 PM

What the fuck?

I must be the only one who is full of shit here...

BTW CSflim, you'll keep old mate.

wolf · 01-20-2005, 12:50 PM

I still laugh at that one.

07-21-2003, 10:17 PM	#1 (permalink)
cabal0428 Upright	The Mass of Hell The following is an actual question given on a University of Washington (Huskies) chemistry midterm. The answer was so "profound" that the professor shared it with colleagues, which is why we now have the pleasure of enjoying it as well. Bonus Question: Is Hell exothermic (gives off heat) or endothermic (absorbs heat)? Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyle's Law, (gas cools off when it expands and heats up when it is compressed) or some variant. One student, however, wrote the following: First, we need to know how the mass of Hell is changing with time. So we need to know the rate at which souls are moving into Hell and the rate at which they are leaving. I think that we can safely assume that once a soul gets to Hell, it will not leave. Therefore, no souls are leaving. As for how many souls are entering Hell, let's look at the different religions that exist in the world today. Some of these religions state that if you are not a member of their religions, and since people do not belong to more than one religion, we can project that all souls go to Hell. With birth and death rates as they are, we can expect the number of souls in Hell to increase exponentially. Now, we look at the rate of change of the volume in Hell. Because Boyle's Law states that in order for the temperature and pressure in Hell to stay the same, the volume of Hell has to expand as souls are added. This gives two possibilities: 1. If Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls enter Hell, then the temperature and pressure in Hell will increase until all Hell breaks loose. 2. Of course, if Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase of souls in Hell, then the temperature and pressure will drop until Hell freezes over. So which is it? If we accept the postulate given to me by Ms. Teresa Banyan during my Freshman year—"…that it would be a cold day in Hell before I sleep with you.:-- and take into account the fact that I still have not succeeded in having sexual relations with her, then #2 cannot be true; and thus I am sure that Hell is exothermic and will not freeze. The student Received the only "A" given.

07-21-2003, 10:50 PM	#3 (permalink)
Slims Eccentric insomniac Location: North Carolina	One of my physics teachers passed that out in class. It's still funny, thanks. __________________ "Socialism is a philosophy of failure, the creed of ignorance, and the gospel of envy, its inherent virtue is the equal sharing of misery." - Winston Churchill "All men dream: but not equally. Those who dream by night in the dusty recesses of their minds wake in the day to find that it was vanity: but the dreamers of the day are dangerous men, for they may act out their dream with open eyes, to make it possible." Seven Pillars of Wisdom, T.E. Lawrence

07-22-2003, 12:49 AM	#4 (permalink)
Ronin_Tiger Crazy Location: Cairo, Egypt	LOL. I loved it. __________________ Assumptions make an ass out of you and mptions....

07-22-2003, 02:35 PM	#9 (permalink)
CSflim Sky Piercer Location: Ireland	The author is among us. no...really... Meridae'n wrote it. honest. http://www.tfproject.org/tfp/showthr...threadid=14563 __________________

07-22-2003, 11:14 PM	#13 (permalink)
Regziever Sexy eh? Location: Sweden	Hehe! Awesome answer! __________________ Life is shit, Death is even worse, So what's the point of killing yourself? /Ignatius Camryn Paladine

07-21-2003, 10:33 PM	#2 (permalink)
plainoldbrent Upright	haha, that's incredible

07-22-2003, 01:25 AM	#5 (permalink)
Sleepyjack Fast'n'Bulbous Location: Australia, Perth	very good

07-22-2003, 08:26 AM	#6 (permalink)
Blue Fish Tilted Location: NJ, USA	Heard it before but still got a laugh out of it

07-22-2003, 08:36 AM	#7 (permalink)
DynamicTopology Upright	rofl great post

07-22-2003, 02:31 PM	#8 (permalink)
GM2 Insane	Funny story, but by no means true.

07-22-2003, 02:42 PM	#10 (permalink)
jdkash Guest	lol funny

07-22-2003, 03:09 PM	#12 (permalink)
The Rogue Tilted	it's a brilliant answer, the guys a genious!

07-23-2003, 12:28 AM	#14 (permalink)
TerresqueÜ Hiding Out	Quite an amazing answer if I do say so myself. __________________ Say yes to the 'Tilted Roleplaying' Forum http://www.tfproject.org/tfp/showthread.php?s=&threadid=1932&highlight=petition

07-23-2003, 04:08 PM	#17 (permalink)
kel WARNING: FLAMMABLE Location: Ask Acetylene	heh that was a good one Need a good variant for "when pigs fly"

01-17-2005, 10:24 PM	#18 (permalink)
Meridae'n Loose Cunt Location: North Bondi RSL	What the fuck? I must be the only one who is full of shit here... BTW CSflim, you'll keep old mate. __________________ What's easier to believe: that a guy was born without sex in the manner of several Greek demigods and grew up to be able to transmute liquids and alter his body density yet couldn't escape government execution, or that three freemasons in a vehicle made with aluminum foil in an era before digital technology escaped our atmosphere, landing on the moon, broadcasted from there, and then flew back without burning up?

01-20-2005, 12:50 PM	#19 (permalink)
wolf Ravenous Location: Right Behind You	I still laugh at that one. __________________ Thousands of years ago, cats were worshipped as Gods. Cats have never forgotten this.