cherriesue

I was just wondering how many people (both men & women) believe what Harry says to Sally about men and women being friends? Is it possible for us to be friends with the opposite sex?

(I hope so...because if it isn't I am friendless.)

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bparker805

Cherrie its possible for men and women to be friends but its the sexual tension that throws everything off! But I can control my animal-like mating instincts and just leer at you from afar.

FaderMonkey

Well.....most of the girls that I'm just friends with are lesbians.....there are a couple that aren't....one of them is my ex that I'm just friends with now (but honestly I still would like to sleep with) and the other is a girl that I would love to date, but now I'm scared that we are too far in the "friend zone" and that she would freak out if I asked her out.

hannukah harry

i think that what he says is really true... sorta. i've got a pretty decent number of female friends, and looking back at those i used to be friends with, and i've wanted to sleep with most of them. it's just the fact that even though one side of a M-F friendship (usually the male side) wants to sleep with the other side, it doesn't happen that often, and when it does sometimes the friendship can stand it, sometimes it can't. but unless the one friend finds his opposite sex friend to be really ugly, the guy will want to bone her.

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Cynthetiq

I have lots of friends who are women that I'm not interested in having sex.

It's just what it is.

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Redjake

it's completely true. I live by that movie.

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bond007

rule of thumb on male-female "friendships"... assuming everyone is heterosexual...
1. one of the parties has a romantic interest in the other (usually some type of secret crush). maybe it's the guy, maybe it's the woman, doesn't matter.
--or--
2. the friendship exists because of a romantic interest in one of their friends.

bond007

cherriesue

just curious... and maybe from a different perspective... but, if you know with a 100% certainty that you're not romantically interested in someone... what are the reasons why you would want to be friends & hang out with 'em???

cherriesue

Most of my friends are male (all of us are hetero) and I have known all of them for a number of years (most of them for 10+) and I have never been interested in them romantically. I have just always had a great time hanging out with all of them. Most of my life most of my friends have been guys...I just seem to get along better with them and have more fun...much less drama than when I have had a number of female friends. I will admit that most of these guys initially met me because they were interested in a female friend of mine but she has been out of the picture and I remain friends with these guys...and we're very close. Does this seem odd?

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JohnnyRock

I have some great friends that are women and I always have.

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bond007

I'd say it's odd... as in it's not ordinarily what happens... but, you raise a valid point that it's possible that once you get beyond the "sexual tension" phase of a male-female relationship... where both parties accept the fact that it's purely platonic... then you can have a genuine friendship with a person of the opposite sex.

sexymama

Maybe part of it is age too. I'm at a new school this year and my three closest colleges are male. I get along fine with the woman too -- but find these friendships interesting as I've mostly been friends with woman in the past due to the whole sexual tension thing. But these guys are all cool and there is no "tension."

BTW -- "When Harry Met Sally" is one of my all time favorite movies!

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cherriesue

This may be true but I have been friends with some of these guys since I was like 14 or 15. I've heard other people say that it isn't possible for men and women to be just friends and I just find it hard to believe because my closest and most cherished friends are men.

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Polyphobic

It's quite possible but does not happen to often. I have had many female friends that were just platonic. Some I had no interest in and some I wanted to sleep with. I did realize that the ones I want to sleep with more than likely would not happen and if it did the friendship would be ruined. The one exception is my wife. She was a friend first and then we became involved.

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