dksuddeth

Breasts are over-rated.

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Dano069

My wife breast fed all three of our kids in public. She would cover herself with a blanket or towel. There's nothing wrong with it. It's perfectly natural. What's un-natural is our Puritan, it's a sex object way of thinking here in the US of A. One of my SILs (Sis In Laws) just had her second baby. She was uncomfortable breast feeding her first in front of me, but now, she covers the baby with a blanket and doesn't seem uncomfortable at all.

Of course, my pervy side says go ahead and look, it's out there, but I'm trying to keep him under lock and key more often.

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quadro2000

It just goes back to the fact that in our society, we don't typically see breasts in public. There's a certain shock to it, but I was certainly never offended (I, for one, will never be offended by a breast out in the open), and I think people that don't understand that a mother is fulfilling a basic NEED in a child. I can't say much that hasn't already been said in this thread, but anybody who can't get past their issues about breastfeeding has much greater issues to worry about.

Amen!

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Lin

I think theres a way of breast feeding a baby almost as if its not happening. I think it would be insensitive to just get 'em out in full veiw and do it. But its totally possible to do it so theres hardly any breast on show.

Charlatan

This just cracked me up... the image is just too funny, creepy, but funny.

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Stompy

I don't think there's anything insensitive about pulling em out.

In fact, I think it's insensitive to hide them

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billege

I'm not sure where you're going with that, because you don't say.
But, making urinating and breast feeding analogous is not valid. There IS no analogy to be made there, trying it makes a poor attempt at a point.

I mean, if you put urinating and breast feeing in the same "natural function" catagory, I feel a strong sense of limited vision from you. I'd also have to disagree completely and totally. It's not even the same ballpark, not remotely.

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kutulu

There is an advantage to getting out of public: its usually more relaxing for the baby to be in a quiet calm place to eat. If we are out in public my wife usually goes to the car but that is only for the baby's sake. Stores and malls are just too hectic and crazy for the baby to really feel relaxed.

Coppertop

She changed her kid's diaper at the table in a restaurant? wtf is wrong with people?!

raeanna74

I was lucky. My husband and I discussed the decision to breastfeed long before my daughter was born. We were in complete agreement. I had also openly discussed the topic with his parents and when the outburst happened with his sister, he and both of his parents spoke up in support of me. My SIL's fiance even expressed a lack of concern over my breastfeeding. I believe she got her ideas from her friends who at that time were of the type who wouldn't even kiss before they got married.

I ended up having to wean my daughter myself since she did not want to wean. After the first year and a half when she was eating all types of table food the nursing only took place around nap times. Eventually I saw she was only asking for it as a form of comfort. Then I turned to snuggling and reading books to replace the time she spent with me. Once in a while she asks for it but I remind her that she's growing up and doesn't need it anymore. She has since seen other mothers who were breastfeeding in public and just commented to me "That baby is getting a SNACK, right??" To her it's natural and not sexual in any way. Why should we as adults view it in any other way.

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little_tippler

Well said, that's a good choice. I think I wouldn't like to be exposed that way either. I like my privacy, I don't think it has to do with being a puritan. I understand that you need to breastfeed in public situations sometimes, but I think covering yourself a little is a considerate thing to do, for yourself and others. Recently I went to my cousin's house whose wife had just had a baby and she breastfed the baby in front of me and didn't cover herself. I didn't mind, we're good friends, but I think if it was me I would have done...or maybe retired to the bedroom while I did. What was said about making polite conversation while breastfeeding, that's what I did, and it wasn't at all embarrassing. More like I was interested, I haven't seen it done that many times and maybe one day...

As for raeanna's story...sex object?!? WTF that's twisted...

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Whether we write or speak or do but look
We are ever unapparent. What we are
Cannot be transfused into word or book.
Our soul from us is infinitely far.
However much we give our thoughts the will
To be our soul and gesture it abroad,
Our hearts are incommunicable still.
In what we show ourselves we are ignored.
The abyss from soul to soul cannot be bridged
By any skill of thought or trick of seeming.
Unto our very selves we are abridged
When we would utter to our thought our being.
We are our dreams of ourselves, souls by gleams,
And each to each other dreams of others' dreams.

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c172g

As stated previously, both my wife and the other people in the room are more comfortable when you throw a blanket over top. If you don't, the teenagers eyes pop out of their head and the old geezers can't help but look. By all rights, you should be able to take your top right off & let the baby feed, but I think if you took a poll, most people would be more comfortable if a little coverup was used.

Grasshopper Green

When I breastfed, I made sure I had a blanket or something with me when we had company, but I had no problem feeding in front of my family without coverup. I actually haven't seen many women breastfeed in public, and I think it's a shame that women feel the need to go to the car or even worse, to a public bathroom. I can't think of a worse place to feed your child when out in public.

My stepsister breastfed until her daughter was about 1 1/2. I was at my dad's house with a friend, and they were playing chess. She was over there at the same time, and as we were all watching the game, she started feeding the child. She had no problem doing it in front of anyone, and my friend was very uncomfortable and ended up getting his butt kicked because he couldn't concentrate. I guess a lot of people are still not comfortable with the natural reason for a womans breasts.

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shakran

They are analagous IF you argue that breastfeeding in public is ok because breastfeeding is a natural act. If you categorize breastfeeding as a natural act (don't worry kids, I know it is), then you must categorize urinating as a natural act (yes, I know that is too).

My point is that if you justify breastfeeding in public by saying "it's a natural act and therefore it's OK to do it in pubilc" then you are giving carte blanche approval to ALL natural acts performed in public. Urination, sex, nose picking, whatever.

If you wish to justify public breastfeeding, but at the same time avoid justifying public urination, then you have to more narrowly classify breastfeeding.


I'm not arguing against public breastfeeding, I'm pointing out that the arguments people have made in favor of it in this thread are too weak to survive a logical assault. Find better arguments.

raeanna74

Ok how about this - The infant is eating. They are getting the milk that they are designed to digest. No formula can completely duplicate the antibiotic properties of breastmilk (Though formula's are getting better all the time.) SO Breastfeeding is as normal and natural are YOU EATING. Either you go eat in the bathroom or don't ask an infant to do so as well. That's where you need to be consistent.

There is no NEED for breasts in the practice of procreation. There is a need for breasts as far as nuturing. Though - don't get me wrong they can be quite a nice addition to sex but so can nibbling on the ears and other hot spots but you don't cover the ears do you??

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My Karma just ran over your Dogma.

shakran

you're not gettng me. An argument was made above that breast feeding in public is ok BECAUSE IT IS NATURAL. If that argument is used, you are setting yourself up for trouble because urination IS NATURAL. You need to find another way to argue it.

And the argument that if I get to eat there, the baby should get to eat there is also invalid. If you make the argument that "the place is for eating, so eating is OK no matter how it is done" then my dog should be able to eat there as well. That's obviously not the case.

The problem is that arguments are being made based on what people feel SHOULD be rather than what they ARE. They feel women SHOULD be able to expose their breasts in public (so do I for that matter - either that or outlaw shirtless men. . . Come to think of it, after all the disturbing sights of shirtless men I've seen at baseball game, maybe that would be the better course ) But in our society, breasts ARE sexualized, like it or not. And if you've ever worn a sexy bra, you're lending support (no pun intended) to that concept. Either work to change that view, or accept the fact that people will be uncomfortable if they see one in public.

JamesB

Sorry - I can't resist .. this is a blatantly stupid statement. Would you rather have your tax money go to special 'nursing stations' at every lavitory location? What you suggest is that tens of thousands of these 'nursing stations' be implemented to alleviate immature discomfort.

Well, I have my pound of flesh now so I will be quiet.

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absorbentishe

A woman should have the right to do this, when and where needed. Other people, should also have the consideration to what is being done. I bet any woman that doesn't cover up while feeding, doesn't really care if she's "seen". My wife breastfeed 3 or our 4, and she covered with a blanket when in public, or in other's company. While the child is latched on, what is there to see, but some fleshy boobage. Don't stare, but if you do, don't get caught staring (been there, done that too many times). It's just natural to look, no matter what, but still be considerate.

shakran

Um, no you don't. CAREFULLY read what I have written (not just the first 4 words) and then I think you'll see we're on the same side.

ngdawg

I preferred to nurse my twins privately, but then again, they took bottles too. Nursing was our quiet time.
Like or not, breasts are sexualized and all the 'it's natural' rhetoric is not going to change that attitude anytime soon.
Next time you are asked if you are uncomfortable, don't lie and the problem won't come back. You were offered an out-would that more nursing moms would be that polite. The ones that insist on whipping out a tit at the slightest whimper, then give the 'wtf are you looking at?' glance at everyone else who dares to stare do nothing to cease the puritanical mores still floating in our heads.

raeanna74

I do agree with this part. As a previously nursing mother I can't imagine doing that. If I nursed my daughter in public and didn't use the blanket (which I did a few times when it was quite hot) I didn't flop it out. I pulled my daughter up to me while I eased up my shirt or opened the pocket. There was barely any chance to see nipple let alone anything else. I don't see the purpose in flopping it out there. I also caught a few people staring or watching. Most of the time I either ignored it or smiled at them. At which I got some smiles back. Once in a great while I'd get a mean look - funny thing was it was from women - I never got a scowl from a man. It's rude to expect the change in thinking overnight. It is reasonable to do your best to make the transition in thought as comfortable for everyone as possible.

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frogza

Breastfeeding in public is not a problem for me, I can distinguish from a sexual situation and a nonsexual one. As more people learn to see breastfeeding as a normal thing, on the same level as someone eating a sandwich, the more of the other type will come around.

Joan of Arc

Breasts are viewed as sexual. That's not going to change. Don't waste your breath.
But to me if a female is breastfeeding, it's just totally different. Most woman who breastfeed try to hide the nipple while the baby's sucking. Which is fine. It at least shows some dignity.

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CandleInTheDark

Breasts would be viewed as sexual even if we lived our entire lives stark naked. Humans are sexual creature; we view bodies sexually regardless of clothes or not. Clothes have only made us uncomfortable with other nude people (and kepts us warm, and dry etc.)

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Citygal

My husband and I are looking at trying for children in about 6 months time. I have every intention of breastfeeding in public. There are ways to feed your child without flashing your breasts to everyone else, whether it's using a blanket or just positioning the child to block the view. While it is nice to consider the feelings of others, I truly believe that people who totally flip out over this issue are the ones with the issue! It's their problem, let them deal with it. A mother has enough to deal with and doesn't need other peoples hang-ups. I have many friends who feed their children infront of both my husband and myself, and I have never seen any more of their breast then I would if they were wearing a low cut top.
I feel that sending a woman to a toilet to feed their child is unhygenic (some public toilets are a disgrace), and simply ostracises them over something women have been doing since the day dot!

f6twister

There is still one part of this discussion that hasn't been addressed....the legal aspect. Does anyone know if their state legally allows breastfeeding in public? I found a section in my state statutes which allows a woman to legally expose her breast to a baby for breastfeeding (therefore, bypassing the indecent exposure laws) but I haven't found anything that specifically allows breastfeeding in public. I have a feeling that most governments are afraid to discuss the issue.

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raeanna74

I do know that Wisconsin allows breastfeeding. I found a list somewhere when I was reading up on it before my daughter was born. I couldn't tell you where though because I checked every book out of the library on it and got some more through interlibrary loan.Here Is an exhaustive list of the laws made to encourage and protect women who choose to breastfeed their infants.

The Department of Health and Human Services also are given government funding to educate expectant mother of the benefits and methods of breastfeeding. It's actually cheaper for the governmental agencies because they aren't needed to provide formula for these mothers who end up under their umbrella.

Many hospitals are beginning to provide full time on staff lactation consultants as well. When my daughter was born a lactation consultant was at my hospital room door the next morning to assist me and was a great help in getting me started. My insurance also paid for a breastpump because I was having trouble getting my milk to come in (average 2-3 days mine was 7 days).

In my parents generation, it was the common suggestion of Dr's for the women to put the infant on the bottle as soon as possible. They are continuing to find benefits to breastfeeding and there is a countrywide campaign by health departments and professionals to get back to breastfeeding. Many women of my mother's age are unfamiliar with breastfeeding and still think as they were told when they were young mother's that breastfeeding is unnecessary. It will take up to 3 generations to change that thinking.

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"Always learn the rules so that you can break them properly." Dalai Lama
My Karma just ran over your Dogma.

spindles

It pity the politician that tries to outlaw it; it also pity the policeman who tries to arrest for it.

In Oz, it is accepted - hardly anyone blinks an eyelid at it. It is not sexual, but there is nothing stopping anyone looking.

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questone

My wife didn't have to do it with our first kid but since she plans to feed longer with the 2nd (which is on his or her way), the situation may come up. I'd rather have my child (or anyone elses child) get the needed nutrition than have to do without because of everyone elses inadaquacies.

drewpy

my wife and I have breatfed eight children. my wife is "laura ingalls-wilder" modest, and has breastfed everywhere: church, resturants, planes, etc. Never been aware of a single issue. Generally, we nurse until two and half years old. I say "we" because I have had to share my wife's breast with my kid's - kind of a bummer - lately.

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Zeraph

If they catch you looking then start hitting the table with your fist and yelling "CHUG CHUG CHUG!" They'll all laugh, problem solved until you get caught looking again...

Lead543

Haha....chug....

My Mom said she'd breast feed in public all the time. Sh'd just bring along a blanket and cover up. She said even then she'd get a few dirty looks. Never thought that feeding a baby in a way that nature provides for would be so "disgusting". Women should cover up when breastfeeding in public however. Yea it sucks....hehe...but there's going to be people out there who oogle and look and make it something disgusting. At the same time there's people who'd walk by and think nothing of it.

Daniel_

I love women.

I love boobies.

I love babies (in a soppy way).

I approve of breastfeedinng.

I try (really hard) to switch off my perverted thoughts of wanting to see if her breasts "let down" when she comes - I hear that some breastfeeding mothers do, and the concept fascinates me (in a shameful dirty way)....

Maybe you should go to www.tshirthell.com and buy THIS:

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The Echo of a distant time
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pattycakes

sign me up... i wanna be breast fed in public.

Actually i have no problem with it tittas were born to be free. They are not as forbidden as we are taught they are. in other countries they walk around with out tops and no one thinks much of it

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RoadRage

My mother called my wife's breastfeeding of our children "unnatural".

It's bizzare when you have to point out to allegedly God-fearing people that breastfeeding is the way God designed it, and to outlaw it in public is to go contrary to God's Plan.

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Lockjaw

I just have one question.

I can understand the desire to feed a child a mother's milk....but....
is there a reason WHY you just don't bottle it? I mean does it go bad quicker out of the body or something?
I have honestly wondered this. I know for some folks it a "freedom" thing but for others it's just being practical so why bother with the potential drama and just not bottle the breastmilk?

Gilda

Breast milk can be bottled and fed to the baby that way, and many women do use a breast pump for that purpose. The milk is a lot like any other; it goes bad rather quickly outside the body if not refrigerated.

A woman's breasts have two biological functions: Feeding a child, and giving her sexual pleasure. In that sense, they are secondary sexual organs. I count myself among those for whom observing a nice set of breasts is sexually stimulating, but when a woman takes out her breast to feed a child, she clearly isn't doing it for a sexual purpose, so the sexual function is

The argument isn't just that breast feeding should be allowed in public because "it's natural". There's a bit being left off of the end to avoid redundancy. Breast feeding should be allowed in public because it's the natural way for a baby to eat. We have different standards of behavior for babies and adults. Babies are allowed to eat and eliminate in public. You want an analogy to a man urinating? Put a diaper on him, and allow him to pee in it, and you have one.

The analogy also breaks down when you consider that the penis is a primary sexual organ. It has three biological functions: Urination, providing the man with sexual pleasure, and delivering sperm. For this to be analogous, the woman would have to be exposing her vagina to breast feed; she isn't.

The problem with finding an analogy here is that there isn't any analogous male behavior. Breast feeding a baby is an activity unique to women*. You can't say "If women are allowed to breast feed, men should be allowed to X" because there is no male equivalent.

That said, breast feeding should be treated like any other public behavior. There are polite and impolite ways to eat in a restaurant. We remove hats and close umbrellas upon entering. We use silverware instead of our hands. We wipe our faces with a napkin, eat with our mouths closed, cover our mouths to burp. Breast feeding should be no different; it should be done discretely when in the presence of others.

*It is technically possible to induce lactation in a male. Men have all of the same equipment in their breasts as women, mammary glands and milk ducts and so forth; they just don't become developed in the absence of the female hormones progesterone (primarily) and estradiol (secondarily). Post-hysterectomy adoptive mothers, MTF transsexuals, and even normal males have all be able to produce breast milk, although (in that order) in a lesser volume and with less nutritional value than that of a woman who has recently given birth or a wet nurse (a woman can maintain her milk indefinitely after giving birth so long as she's continually nursing or pumping).

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aKula

What about the argument that urinating in the streets is unhygenic and breastfeeding is not?

jhkayakr

Everthing having to do with a nude or semi-nude body, doesn't have to be sexual. Babies have to eat, and the mother has to feed it. I think thats all there is too it. Urination is unhygenic and dangerous to others. Urine is not sterile. Its a waste product.

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powerclown

Don't appreciate it much.

Take care of your personal bodily functions in private..no need to force your situation on others. These days, it's become a badge of independence and some amount of rebellion to take care of your business in public. Ladies, a little class - be discreet, and feed your babies till they're full and satisfied. In private.