I have been thinking about the educational system ever since I read the thread "Is New Generation Getting Too Much Info ?" Great topic!
No, this isn't the first time I have thought about this subject. I have thought about this quite often through out the years as my son went through school. My son .. he has been a learning experince for me with himself as he grew. That doesn't mean it's bad. He really has opened my eyes up to alot being the challenging child he was to raise. I wouldn't trade any of it for the world tho. Even tho he still may not have his life together completely. Lifes experinces for him has became his best educational system he could have possibly had. All I can hope with this is that hopefully in the long run it will make a better man out of him where the system .. yes the system failed him.
What really slays me are these kids that go to school with behavior problems. First answer for their behavior problem always seems to be A.D.H.D. Some kids yeah.. I have heard how much of a diffrence it made for them. Great! My son? Not!!
For 10 years my child took ritland. For maybe 8 out of those 10 I heard my son come home saying he felt diffrent than the other kids having to take medicine. Made me think. It never seemed as tho it helped him. He didn't have counciling available through the schools for this problem to monitor him. The same school who seemed to have been the ones pushing for him to be placed on ritland. Why I asked myself several times, should I as a parent have to provide counciling for something I felt wasn't the right answer for my son. The school had recommended he be diagnoised. The school demanded he have ritland. If ever his prescribtion ran out. They didn't want him at school. Altho I never heard anything good said about him at conferences. It was always the same. The same I had heard before ritland came into his life.
I went to the school several times expressing my concerns. I suggested these kids have counciling to help boost their esteem and to keep their esteem level up. As I saw my sons enthusiasm for school drop almost over night and had heard him make negative comments in regards to himself. These kids are started out at such young age on ritland. Start counciling sessions for these kids through the schools as soon as this child starts to take meds for A.D.H.D . The younger you start this for them the better. What about the future and what it holds for this child who now is diagnoised with A.D.H.D? Will this be a problem for the rest of their life? What kind of job will they be able to hold if they don't learn to control it? Can they hold down a job without being disruptive? My son was 16 and still I was told he was disruptive in class. So they get a pill.. and they are told here.. this pill will help you. But don't do drugs. Is it a no wonder my kid tokes? So along with counciling. Help teach the child to control this behavior and they don't have to rely on meds nor should A.D.H.D. be used for an excuse for this child's behavior. What crutch will they have to lean on when they get older? Oh I robbed a bank becasue I have A.D.H.D and can't seem to hold a job because of it?
Thats so whacked!
So now we have a child who is pinned as a disruptive child. My child was a kid that just did not want to be in school period. He had better things he wanted to do. So the blame game starts. And of course the finger got pointed in my direction. Goly gee .. I got to be chosen. How special that made me feel.
It was all my fault this child had problems. Had to be something going on at home. Bright idea.. lets ask the child. Sure why not, why not give the kid an excuse? Come on, how is a kid gonna respond? Opportunity has just been opened up for this child who for some reason isn't able to learn and disrupts class. Who always seems to be in trouble and serving detentions. But yet this child is able to catch on quickly to an opportunity that has just gained him sympathy.
Smart? I would say this child is too smart for his own britches. He then plays it to the max. The bigger the story and worst it sounds the more that child reads into the sympathy the person is begining to show more and more in his/her facial expressions.
So now it all begins. Family counciling. Omg hours and hours of counciling to try to figure out what this childs problem is and why this family doesn't seem to be able to function properly together? (Of course if it wasn't for dysfunctionable..we wouldn't have the Simpsons today) So now you go to counciling feeling as though you are doing something wrong as a parent because someone at the school has said so. No parent in their right mind wants to fail their child. I mean come one those words are ringing in your brain, the teacher may as well have said Your a bad parent! So now you rack your brain trying to figure out what you have done wrong just to have a counciler ask you that very same question that you didn't have an answer for when it came to asking yourself. Arrhhhgggggg!!
So you go over everything. Maybe I spoiled him to much. Maybe I haven't given him enough attention. You have tried to do everything right that you can think of. What have you done wrong as parent that has gotten you to this point? Isn't this counciler suppose to be helping you figure out what your doing wrong? So now your poor kid, uhhuh, right ..has not only been smart enough to play the educational system but smart enough to play a counciling session as well as he also just played you. This child has now recieved more attention. One on one time with the teacher.. the principle... the counciler.. and you. Not to mention the child is now out of school for this session and you treat the kid to something. Be it a toy or something to eat out .. clothes anything that makes you feel better as a parent because you are now dealing with an overwhelming sence of guilt to think you may be a bad parent.
And the whole problem started because? This child just did not want to be in school because for some reason the way the child was being taught held no intrest for this child.
When my mother had been in the hospital the nurse asked my mother how she learnt best. For someone to tell her or for someone to show her. If this is something the hospital has picked upon in educating people with their medical problems they may have to tend to for prolonged periods of time on their own. Then why haven't the schools picked up on it or maybe they have by now? I know I learn better in job situations being shown how to do a job other than someone telling me. Is there a way to maybe correspond together some kind of class that teaches by teaching with hands on material?
Can't hurt. We just may get a few more kids we have actually educated doing it this way.
But no what was the solution for my son? Alternitive school...a half a day. Gee what a treat for him. It was exactly what he wanted! So he was rewarded with a half a day of school? Please!! This was the answer in trying to teach my kid an education? Give him a half a day and then the rest of the day he could run while I was at work? That about added up to trouble.
Not to mention, not every family works day shift hours. What about those kids that just may not function as well during the day? I find myself to be more alert and motivated second shift hours. I hate early mornings and having to be up and on the run. What about possible night classes for kids? We keep cutting back in the schools because of funding. Well .. there are two possible ideas so far. Seems to me it could cut back on the Alternative schools and put money back into regular schools.
What about parents that work second shift? Where are their kids of an evening if they are actually to old for a sitter? Out maybe running around? Mine was. I know he and knew he was. Had to work. Getting in trouble? Yeah he was. Seems that if they were in school and on the same time scheduale as the kids parents maybe there wouldn't be that temptation for a disater waiting to happen of an evening. There again is yet more money for educational purposes because you'd be taking kids off the streets at night. Which could only be less money being spent for the judicational systems juvinille offenders.
It's not like I have a degree to be a teacher or anything.. let alone a degree that would make me some big wig on the top of the totem pole. I am by far not trying to knock anyone. These are just things I observed through out the years.. experinced with my son and the schools here. And ideas that have crossed my mind on more than one occasion that may have helped my kid better himself. And wonder why these idea's may or may not work?