Be like Nefir. Shave your head. Grow a goatee.
Better yet, let your GF do it (shave your head, that is... not grow a goatee). Make a party out of it. 
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You do not use a Macintosh, instead you use a Tandy
Kompressor break your glowstick, Kompressor eat your candy
Kompressor open jaws, Kompressor release ants
Kompressor watch you scream, Because Kompressor does not dance
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