Nazggul, a distinguished gentleman from San Francisco, said in another recent thread, that "I think there are a lot of women out there who still find that Alpha Male attitude attractive (or mistake it as confidence or bravado), so don't expect it to change in our lifetime".
I've always found this an interesting subject, and while it has probably been covered ten times over, I don't think it has been very recently, so hopefully someone will be inclined to offer their thoughts.
This is mind-boggling for me, so let me try and wrap my brain around it. It seems to me that many if not most women don't really know what they want, or are simply not happy with what they got once they get it. I'm referring to the choice between the Alpha Male and the Sensitive Type. And typically, it IS a choice, even though some men possess both of these qualities in one habitat. Quite the accomplishment in itself, I might add.
There's the type of woman who is attracted to the Sensitive Type. She likes N'Sync, or any other crappy boy band, possibly because, well, it's a bunch of handsome (in a sort of plastic way) blokes standing nearly topless in the rain, singing about how much they want you back, complete with their altar boy voices. Is there a teengirl in the world who wouldn't find her panties wet just from looking at the CD cover?
Of course not.
Now, according to Desmond Morris, these girls will want this touchy feely guy because the guy possesses certain characteristics that are, of nature,
female. These characteristics make the man less threatening, less overpowering. Not to mention the cultural significance of finding a guy who's "romantic". The attentive husband type.
Then there's the girl who digs the Bad Boy. Oh yeah, the lure of the Bad Boy, nothing quite like it I reckon. He's a vile sexual beast and he's going to take you by force -- or at the very least find that zone between extreme determination and the extent of your comfort. He breaks the rules, he's a modern day savage, and you want to be the woman that tames him. There must be something special to him, right?
Well, of course.
This gets complicated when the Sensitive Type turns out to be, well, sensitive. He's not exciting. If someone throws a nasty slur your way, he won't throw a punch at them, he'll want to talk it out like gentlemen. What is he, a dog or a man? He appealed to you because he was easy-going, he agreed with you and was considerate to your thoughts and feelings. The one thing you did not notice was that he didn't have opinions. He simply shared yours. So yeah, he's not exciting. He doesn't throw you on the bed and rip your clothes off. You wish you had gone with the bad boy.
Oh, right, the Bad Boy. Now he's a jewel. Except that you never tamed him, he still fucks other girls on the side, because he's a
rebel. But he was supposed to stop being a rebel, or at least not be one towards
you. He does throw you on the bed and fuck your brains out...but he doesn't whisper sweet nothings into your ear, and won't even sit down to talk about marriage. Now, that man that Jane is dating, he on the other hand seems kind of boring, but at least he loves to babysit for his friends, wants to get married, makes a decent enough money and doesn't make you reach for the puke bag when you look at him.
And you both wish you had gone the other way...
Okay, so it's an exaggeration. But as most exaggerations, it's also true.
In short, most women I know are quite indecisive. I'm not saying that's a bad thing. But they really don't seem to know what they want, and once they have something they want something else. Someone has said, that when a man and a woman hook up, the woman wants the man to change but he doesn't, yet the man doesn't want the woman to change, but she does. My wife for example, she wants me to be a MAN, but can't stand it when I AM.
It's all part of God's evil plan, I tell you.