booboo82

I'm a 29 year old female (birthday was in May) and I am absolutely at the end of the line. I have no job, no car, no furniture, no boyfriend...I can go on but I'm sure you get the point. What I do have is a Mom that is allowing me to stay at her house and there's no problem with food/shower/etc.

The story starts when I turned 24. I moved to California and tried to get a job without success. Luckily I met an older man that was loving and allowed me to stay at his place rent free if I would help out with the house. I did that for a year, all the while looking for a profession that I would enjoy honestly, from my heart. I never really did find that job. I found other things. Like working at a coffee shop, meeting some new friends, and that was also the time that I met the love of my life. Him and I would be "dating" off and on because of our extreme passions that would cause extremely big fights. My father died, I went home for a few weeks, then back out to California to continue my coffee job. Then I got pregnant and had an abortion.

I'll cut to the chase as best I can. Everyday, I wake up and tell myself that this is the start of something new...But it almost never takes me to that point of where I need to break through with my life. There's always some little set back. I have $1.32 in my bank account, my phone is about to be shut off and I can't see how this can get any better or worse.

Can anyone please give me some advice because I'm lost. I've been lost a few times before but never this deep in it.

Not to mention, the love of my life just came to visit me from half-way across the country and I blew it. I blew a fuse or something and started screaming at him telling him he's a "cheater/liar/I hate him etc" and I swear to God it was all a blur.....I don't remember what I was saying.