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Plus one for what's been said so far.
Communication is key. You and she need to be able to really postgame stuff if your sex life is going to consistently be satisfying.
The other thing is, maybe you guys need a safety word. Because sometimes (only once in my personal experience, but I hear it happens with some frequency) women who have a submissive streak need to be able to "really" fight, including saying no, and other kinds of protesting, so they can be "overpowered." And unless, as a couple, you're extremely experienced at the kind of moment-to-moment "check-in" empathic connection that can run simultaneously with hardcore B/D roleplaying, that means that a safety word is key, so that she can protest to her heart's desire, but also feel safe that you'll stop if she needs you to, and you can feel safe and comfortable "overpowering" her over her "protests."
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Dull sublunary lovers love,
Whose soul is sense, cannot admit
Absence, because it doth remove
That thing which elemented it.
(From "A Valediction: Forbidding Mourning" by John Donne)
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