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You probably need to break it off clean with the ex. You are just stringing her along and hurting her this way. It will cost you the friendship with her, but that is just part of the relationship you have already "stopped" having. You can't have your cake and eat it too, in other words.
Even if you have been honest with her and told her you were never going to have a life-long deep commitment to her, your actions have said different to her. Break clean and sometime in the future maybe you can be friends again, without the sex, of course. Truthfully you seem to be treating the ex as a security blanket, and now you want to know how to give it up without being the bad guy. Impossible at this point bro
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bill hicks - "I don't mean to sound bitter, cold, or cruel, but I am, so that's how it comes out."
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