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Old 05-23-2009, 05:23 PM   #12 (permalink)
Lindy
Junkie
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by neflyte View Post
....i apparently started mentioning my ex only after a couple dates. Yes, i know this is bad...
my question is: how can I relate to someone i'm dating (or interested in dating) when i can't bring up the only relationship experience i've had?
Try to find someone with areas of commonality. And talk about them rather than you.
I'm going to quote myself (abridged) out of another similar thread. I hope that's not considered bad form, but I don't want to write it all again.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Lindy View Post
Try to put yourself in places where you'll find people (including women) that share your interests. You do have interests, don't you? In your OP and other posts you don't say anything about yourself, except what you lack. Are you interested in mathematics, motorcycles, or music? Do you play poker, bridge, or Monopoly? Are you a geek, or a runner, or into meditation? Do you like museums, baseball, or old cars? Fishing, hunting, oil painting? Church, temple, or mosque? It is always easier to start up a conversation with someone when you have areas of commonality.
And don't talk about your ex!! I went out on an arranged blind date once, and all the guy could talk about was his ex. I know that this should probably go without saying, but you may need to hear it. By the end of the evening I felt like I knew her (the ex) pretty well, but I didn't know him at all!

Lindy
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