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Well, in my experience jealousy can not be conquered. I'm not a jealous guy in any way, I encourage others to dance with my girlfriends all the time. Other friends, however, have tried the path you're taking and it ends up burying the jealousy until it erupts in a firestorm.
Talk to your wife about your feelings NOW. Let her know what your concerns are, obviously being included in this whole aspect was part of what you sought in the beginning. It's not wrong of you to point that out, that you're really being poorly dealt. This was something you were going to let her do, but also be there with her.
The line I've drawn between cheating and an open-relationship is if both members are included in the sexual act. I've never done it, but if my GF wanted to be with another man... I'd have to be there to be ok with it. You can draw whatever line you want, we have all sorts of situations here at the TF.
What you can't do, is not include your wife in your worries and attempt to bury jealousy by shear will. It won't work.
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"Smite the rocks with the rod of knowledge, and fountains of unstinted wealth will gush forth." - Ashbel Smith as he laid the first cornerstone of the University of Texas
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