My girlfriend at present i met in december of last year, when I met her she told me or I found out that she was moving to australia to work for a few years, before heading off to uk/america/greece i think it was. Initially after just knowing her for a few moments i felt sad about it, dunno why guess it was to me a love at first sight kind of thing, well more of an aweness at first sight.
Anyways after a few weeks of knowing her we hooked up and started what we called a freinds with benefits relationship, kinda weird at the time because hse was a virgin so the benefits were really just having someone be really close to you. To me since i got to know her she's become my best friend so that suited me well. Anyways after a month or two she was no longer a virgin, the benefits were amazing, and we never really talked about what was going to happen come march when she was moving away to australia. we just took things as it happened and for those 2 months i had the best time of my life. As you would expect march arrived quicker than i would have liked it to, while seeing her off at the airport (an emotional time) she told me she loved me (i had told her 2 weeks before hand in a state of being off my mind on some illicit drug (she didnt take kindly to this as you would expect...).
originally we were just going to end it all when she left, but we realised we really had a good relationship going (we hadnt argued the entire time we'd been together, and she was what I would consider a soul mate to me). The night before she left we did some talking and decided that we'd just try to keep thigns going and she'd be back within 3 months for a visit anyway... that lasted all of about 5 minutes after she landed, we continued contact txting eachother like mad. And I ended up flying over for a week 4 weeks after she left. Since then we havnt been apart for longer than 4 weeks. We're both completly in love with eachother and even though we're away from one another for quite long periods of time we're managing it quite well.
In my advice, just do what you can... talk to her as much as you can, and just remember how you felt while you were together and if it's going to work out then it will. just yeah, do the best you can. Believe me it does suck being away from someone that you like so much, it hurt me a lot when she left and whenever we have to say goodbye but in the end the pain type feeling will go away.
Quote:
|
Originally Posted by BigDonkey2
1. Trust - You have to have complete trust in each other to have an LDR or everything will fall apart. She might think that if you don't answer your phone that you might be cheating or doing whatever if she doesn't trust you. Believe me, I've seen it happen. My roommate's girlfriend from spring training last year called him 128 times in one day because she thought he was cheating on her. NO JOKE. Everytime he didn't answer the phone she thought he was cheating on her. Alas, they're not together anymore.
2. Communication - This is another key issue. You need to be open and honest about everything that happens because if you lie about things its just going to magnify everything to the Nth degree. One lie starts another and starts another and it just snowballs from there. If there is a problem or something bugging you that shes doing/not doing you need to tell her because its just going to bother you and/or push you away. Talk everyday, email, text message, ANY form of communication everyday is a must. For some reason if you can't talk on a certain day because you're doing something TELL HER! Don't just say I can't talk tomorrow or whatever because girls are girls and will assume the worst or just get stupid thoughts in their head that are not rational whatsoever. COMMUNICATE COMMUNICATE COMMUNICATE!!!
3. Understanding - You both need to be understanding with each other. You realize you miss each other but if you just sit there on the phone and sob about how much you miss each other its going to go nowhere. You both need to stay positive and be happy with where you are. Granted you are away from each other, you need to realize that you're not going to see each other for *insert time frame* and try to keep yourself occupied as best as possible. I made this mistake when my first ex went to France. I had nothing but time on my hands and sat around and did nothing and moped around for a few months being sad because I wasn't going to see her. You CANNOT do this. You will only make yourself more sad and lonesome. Keep busy by hanging out with friends and/or family or take up some new hobbies. Again, distance magnifies everything because you cannot be there to talk things out face to face. Talking things out on the phone and/or email is not the same. Facial expressions and such are taken differently on the phone and ESPECIALLY in emails. If she has to do something on a certain night and won't be able to talk to you don't be sad but just understand that she would really love to talk to you but she can't. Same for you. She can't get mopey and sad because you can't talk to her one night or day because you're busy. Talk as much as you can and/or want. On the other hand, don't sit on the phone all day with each other telling her how much you miss her. Talking too much on the phone can backfire as well because sometimes you have nothing to talk about and then you say you want to go do something and she'll react with "What you don't want to talk to me anymore?" It's happened before. Just a warning.
4. Masturbation - Everybody is different, but most men are the same. You need your fix. Do what you need to do and take care of business. Maybe if you guys have some alone time experiement with phone sex or get some webcams and have fun with those. This section is pretty self explanatory.
|
listen to this aswell, just to comment on it you really need to be open with your gf. mine is the only person i really trust, and that's why i think it's got on so well. We have experimented with phone/internet/webcam/txt/pxt type sex and it's actually really fun. we're also both open to masturbation and she's got no problem with porn and me watching it, she actually constantly asks me what porn i have and asks to see it when she gets back for visits.
communication and trust are what you really need to have for it to work, if you have those two factors, then everything else will fall into place