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The story above is a very typical one for serious road cyclists.
In addressing your situation specifically I would add that you really need a bike shop that has experience doing fittings. You absolutely can get a comfortable fit on a road bike, but you need to have someone who knows what they're doing fit you. Your body habitus should not be an impediment.
Having said that, I wouldn't flip out too much over the fit of your first bike. Ideally, you could go pay for a fit, then look for a high quality used bike that's close to that fit. Bicycle enthusiasts are total equipment whores, often buying and then selling perfectly good bikes because they just like trying out the latest and greatest, and then moving on. You will get great bikes at 50% minimum discount if you do your homework. Places to look include the message board at the serotta forum, and road bike review dot com.
I'd ride that first bike for a year or so. If you do get into it you will find that your favored position, and your fit, will evolve over that year. Once that's happened, sell the first bike and go get something new (or even custom depending on budget) and go for the ideal fit. If you don't end up getting hooked on cycling, well then it's no big loss and you move on.
Have fun! Let us know how it turns out.
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