Mal NAILED it.
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all you can do is point out when she does something how it makes you feel... It's not your place to point the finger and say you do this you do that blah blah... It's just your perception of things...
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This is true of just about everyone - it's not really one's place to tell someone else how they should behave or what is right or wrong. You CERTAINLY can tell her how something she does makes YOU feel. Because in that case, it's always right. She can disagree that she does something wrong, but it's hard for her to disagree with how something makes YOU feel. If she doesn't care how it makes you feel? Well, it's either something you get over or
she's someone you get over.