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Leto · 11-02-2005, 01:39 PM

Time will heal. well maybe. I have the identical experience to yours. I tell you, that for months i would be reminded by the smallest things. It didn't help that Queens was a small university, and we kept crossing paths at parties, on campus etc.

Like you I felt that I would never meet somebody who knew me as well. Who was as intimate. who looked / felt / tasted as good. Everybody was pale in comparison. I would sit in lectures, and not hear anything. I almost lost my year. I even dropped out of a course (limnology) that we were in together because I couldn't stand the new distance. She also had a new BF right from the day after the breakup.

I did not think that I would ever meet anybody that could be as good for me as she was. From the time of break up (October) to the time I had a new girl friend (February) I went through a few quickie or rebound relationships that just did not do it for me (although I feel really badly for the girls that got my half-assed / shallow attention at this low point).

I even got beat up by some CFB Kingston Army dudes, because I could care less, and told them all to fuck off.

But gradually I shook off the malaise. Friends. My circle of friends helped me out. I also took a stand, and insisted that she remain in that circle, as they were her's too. and then started to participate in activities that took me to meet other people. I met my new GF while on an out of town football game trip and was immediately captivated by her smile. I actually forgot about my ex, and actually began to enjoy pursuing a relationship again. One that I wanted.

Even now, almost 20 yrs later, certain things will remind me of my ex, but now it's buffered by a sense of relief that we didn't hook up permanently in the end. She is still a friend, and my now wife and I attend her parties and get togethers on a regular basis.

Just keep this fact in focus: There was a time when you did not know your old girlfriend. You were just fine then. Now you have to get back to that place, but with a sack load of experience and wisdom. You will be fine again, and will meet somebody else.

Think of it as a mantra.

and.. good luck!

11-02-2005, 01:39 PM	#5 (permalink)
Leto Junkie Location: The Danforth	Time will heal. well maybe. I have the identical experience to yours. I tell you, that for months i would be reminded by the smallest things. It didn't help that Queens was a small university, and we kept crossing paths at parties, on campus etc. Like you I felt that I would never meet somebody who knew me as well. Who was as intimate. who looked / felt / tasted as good. Everybody was pale in comparison. I would sit in lectures, and not hear anything. I almost lost my year. I even dropped out of a course (limnology) that we were in together because I couldn't stand the new distance. She also had a new BF right from the day after the breakup. I did not think that I would ever meet anybody that could be as good for me as she was. From the time of break up (October) to the time I had a new girl friend (February) I went through a few quickie or rebound relationships that just did not do it for me (although I feel really badly for the girls that got my half-assed / shallow attention at this low point). I even got beat up by some CFB Kingston Army dudes, because I could care less, and told them all to fuck off. But gradually I shook off the malaise. Friends. My circle of friends helped me out. I also took a stand, and insisted that she remain in that circle, as they were her's too. and then started to participate in activities that took me to meet other people. I met my new GF while on an out of town football game trip and was immediately captivated by her smile. I actually forgot about my ex, and actually began to enjoy pursuing a relationship again. One that I wanted. Even now, almost 20 yrs later, certain things will remind me of my ex, but now it's buffered by a sense of relief that we didn't hook up permanently in the end. She is still a friend, and my now wife and I attend her parties and get togethers on a regular basis. Just keep this fact in focus: There was a time when you did not know your old girlfriend. You were just fine then. Now you have to get back to that place, but with a sack load of experience and wisdom. You will be fine again, and will meet somebody else. Think of it as a mantra. and.. good luck!