Your brother is separated from her, so I don't see how the ex-SIL should even be a factor in this; she's no longer part of your family. *Especially* if your dad sees her as his new girlfriend. Your dad and mom are still together, right?
Invite SIL: piss off your mom, your brother, your husband, and yourself.
Don't invite SIL: piss off your dad.
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I can't read your signature. Sorry.
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