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Trueheart, don't be an idiot. The patch uses a different formulation than the pill and it is not only possible, but quite LIKELY, that taking hormones will mess with your sex drive.
Tres, good, I'm glad she is on a lower dose; that sounds like it should help. I'm currently in the problem of finding a new method myself. I switched to Depo (shot) because I couldn't remember the pill well enough and the patch made me sick; but, Depo made my period come and...never stop. As of next week, I will have been bleeding for two months straight. NOT COOL!
Depending on how your woman feels about barrier methods (condom), you could have her use the pill and then also use condoms. The two together are very safe, even if you miss one pill. You could also use spermicide. Basically anything that pushes the odds in your favor. And, if your woman misses two pills, ABSTAIN until the next cycle (according to the directions on the package). Think of it as an excuse to get lots of head.
I totally understand you not wanting to have 'pity sex'. Until she is feeling better, you should try to spice things up for her, so there is something going on besides just sex. Like for me, when I'm less interested in sex itself, I will ask for unusual things like sex in the shower, where there are other sensations going on besides just sex. Try mixing in sound, taste, smell, etc. to hold her interest, or play games, including roleplaying or dress-up. This can help keep her entertained and she will enjoy herself more, even if the physical pleasure is dampened somewhat by her medications.
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