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clavus · 10-20-2004, 03:43 PM

Here is what is going to happen in the year following the Presidential Election, regardless of who wins:

Even though roughly half the country voted against him, the President will declare his victory a “mandate from the people.”

We will long for the days of $2.00 per gallon gasoline.

There will be an ad for Viagra (or some other boner-inducing drug) featuring two guys. People will freak right the fuck out of their everlovin’ minds. The media firestorm will be better than any ad campaign money could buy.

Florida will have a hurricane

California will have an earthquake.

New Mexico will have a huge fire.

Texas will have a rodeo

Right-to-Lifers will figure out that fertility clinics destroy more embryos than abortion clinics. Embryologists will be added to the list of their targets, thereby setting a new standard for irony.

Crazy-ass Muslims will kill a bunch of people somewhere in the world.

There will be a big hubbub about outing that CIA agent Valerie Plame. Nobody of any consequence will take a fall for it.

Somebody, somewhere in the USA will get shot and people will blame assault weapons/videogames/music/movies/TV (but not the shooter)

I will have some wierd injury.

The US government will continue to kiss the Saudi’s asses.

There will be a well-publicized accident involving one of those new itty-bitty Smartcars and an SUV. Stupid-ass legislation will result.

Some part of the country will have really strange weather. Some people will blame global warming. Some people will say the weather is proof that global warming is bullshit.

There will be a serious injury or death on a “reality TV” show.

The Oakland Raiders will suck.

There will be incomprehensible violence in Africa. Not much will be done about it.

Did I miss anything?

10-20-2004, 03:43 PM	#1 (permalink)
clavus pow! Location: NorCal	after the election... Here is what is going to happen in the year following the Presidential Election, regardless of who wins: Even though roughly half the country voted against him, the President will declare his victory a “mandate from the people.” We will long for the days of $2.00 per gallon gasoline. There will be an ad for Viagra (or some other boner-inducing drug) featuring two guys. People will freak right the fuck out of their everlovin’ minds. The media firestorm will be better than any ad campaign money could buy. Florida will have a hurricane California will have an earthquake. New Mexico will have a huge fire. Texas will have a rodeo Right-to-Lifers will figure out that fertility clinics destroy more embryos than abortion clinics. Embryologists will be added to the list of their targets, thereby setting a new standard for irony. Crazy-ass Muslims will kill a bunch of people somewhere in the world. There will be a big hubbub about outing that CIA agent Valerie Plame. Nobody of any consequence will take a fall for it. Somebody, somewhere in the USA will get shot and people will blame assault weapons/videogames/music/movies/TV (but not the shooter) I will have some wierd injury. The US government will continue to kiss the Saudi’s asses. There will be a well-publicized accident involving one of those new itty-bitty Smartcars and an SUV. Stupid-ass legislation will result. Some part of the country will have really strange weather. Some people will blame global warming. Some people will say the weather is proof that global warming is bullshit. There will be a serious injury or death on a “reality TV” show. The Oakland Raiders will suck. There will be incomprehensible violence in Africa. Not much will be done about it. Did I miss anything? __________________ Ass, gas or grass. Nobody rides for free. Last edited by clavus; 10-20-2004 at 03:48 PM..