View Single Post
Old 09-20-2004, 05:58 AM   #13 (permalink)
SilverScooter
Upright
 
(man, i've been looking for somewhere to make my first post all morning!)
here's the deal, and i'd like to think i know something about these long, smooshy relationships, because that's all i've had. first, let's talk about my experiences for a quick second. i met a girl in my freshman year of high school (i know, i know; but don't peg my situation as puppy love just yet) and she moved away at the end of the year, we decided to stay together and were happily (or so i thought) intact until the beginning of junior year. then she pulled something on me where she just went off on little shit that was building up and, more or less, dumped me for the first guy that payed attention to her in the new town she moved to. currently, i'm dating a girl and have been for the past 7 or so months (coincidence?) and having known her and having been friends with her for a hell of a lot longer than the first girl, it's incredible. i'm doing the ldr thing (i'll save that can of worms for another post) and we're both extremely happy.

ok, bottom line (provided you guys are still there). girls think a lot more than they talk, which is sometimes hard to believe. but they have qualms about the relationship and their future with you, any further commitment plans, etc. and you need to unearth those things before they all come out at once. with girl number 1, i thought i loved her, and told her ad nauseum; eventually i just figured out that she wasn't happy and hadn't been for a while when she exploded on me. girl 2, on the other hand, tells me what scares her and what worries her and it makes us a lot closer to have that outlet to each other.

my suggestion, don't allow yourself to put up with more than you're willing to deal with. you can fall in love again (and if what you have now isn't love, you won't figure it out until you actually do) and you can keep on keeping on. between girlfriends i had a year of self-searching to do, i didn't think i'd feel that way again, but lo and behold: life goes on. if think you still have something, talk to her, get her to tell you what scares her and goddamnit, make it better.

the best of luck to you.
SilverScooter is offline  
 

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31 32 33 34 35 36 37 38 39 40 41 42 43 44 45 46 47 48 49 50 51 52 53 54 55 56 57 58 59 60 61 62 63 64 65 66 67 68 69 70 71 72 73 74 75 76 77 78 79 80 81 82 83 84 85 86 87 88 89 90 91 92 93 94 95 96 97 98 99 100 101 102 103 104 105 106 107 108 109 110 111 112 113 114 115 116 117 118 119 120 121 122 123 124 125 126 127 128 129 130 131 132 133 134 135 136 137 138 139 140 141 142 143 144 145 146 147 148 149 150 151 152 153 154 155 156 157 158 159 160 161 162 163 164 165 166 167 168 169 170 171 172 173 174 175 176 177 178 179 180 181 182 183 184 185 186 187 188 189 190 191 192 193 194 195 196 197 198 199 200 201 202 203 204 205 206 207 208 209 210 211 212 213 214 215 216 217 218 219 220 221 222 223 224 225 226 227 228 229 230 231 232 233 234 235 236 237 238 239 240 241 242 243 244 245 246 247 248 249 250 251 252 253 254 255 256 257 258 259 260 261 262 263 264 265 266 267 268 269 270 271 272 273 274 275 276 277 278 279 280 281 282 283 284 285 286 287 288 289 290 291 292 293 294 295 296 297 298 299 300 301 302 303 304 305 306 307 308 309 310 311 312 313 314 315 316 317 318 319 320 321 322 323 324 325 326 327 328 329 330 331 332 333 334 335 336 337 338 339 340 341 342 343 344 345 346 347 348 349 350 351 352 353 354 355 356 357 358 359 360