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Just a stranger's .02 here....it might help to stop thinking of her as your 'ex girlfriend' and see her as a human being. Kind of a 'new eyes' thing, where you try to see her in a more objective kind of light. It took me about two years to get over my failed relationship, and I was only able to do so when I realized that my thinking of her in those terms was coloring my perceptions of her as a person.
People have flaws--sometimes big hairy ones.
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