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she's as welcome as a whore in church.
He's as welcome as a bastard at a family reunion
He's so ugly he'd make a freight train take a dirt road (hey, I didn't come up with 'em!)
He's happier'n a pig in shit
he's Slicker'n goose shit on a linoleum floor
She's a sweet thing (translation: She's really nice)
She's a sweet lil' thing (translation: She's a bitch)
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