Withholding Sex. Good Strategy?

Sorry...I wanted to post the article because it reminded me of one of my favorite plays...and then it got me thinking about withholding sex as a strategy to get what you want. Of course people assume that women are the culprits, but I have known men to do it too.

 

I guess, it depends on the situation. In a normal relationship, not a good idea. To stop bloodshed/war...

 

Ahh...so I'm not the only one...

 

God. The power of pussy never ceases to amaze, here. So freaking awesome! We could feasibly remodel the world by doing this.

 

You forget Helen of Troy, that forbidden rose garden launched a thousand ships.

 

The threat of withholding sex might bring about a chuckle...

a) I know it's not Universal, but I find that women are not as motivated by sex as men.
b) I am very motivated and don't think I could withhold sex if faced by a woman asking me for it (especially one that is motivated).

 

In regards to the OP and posted article, nope, never have been in that situation. And I've never withheld sex to get what I want. To me, that seems more than a little bit exploitative and manipulative. Then again, I'm not in a violence-stricken village. I'm in a relatively peaceful small city with a moderate to large population density within the surrounding 50 miles or so. If I were motivated merely by sex, and if I encountered something like his in a short term relationship/dating/fwb situation: buh...bye. I potentially have other options available. In a long term relationship I would hope, at least in my case, that I would be perceptive enough to see that there were issues beforehand. Given my current location if it came to that, well...if it degenerates to playing games, probably time to move on.

 

I think withholding sex would pretty much make a village violence-stricken.

 

Yes, I didn't masturbate for a month until I bought myself an iPad. I knew if Iheld out long enough I'd eventually cave in.

 

ZS: Lysistrata? There are a couple of hilarious translations of that play. Aristophanes???

Withholding sex really backfired in my relationship. At least I think that's what happened. When we first got together, I found it odd that I would drive in from another city 180 miles away every weekend, then not have sex for months. At one point he said something about making me "work for it" so I'd be even more arduous (i.e., horny). It totally backfired. I almost broke up with him, thinking he just wasn't attracted to me.

That initial misstep pretty much ruined our sex life ever since.

 

It does not work on me. It does annoy me a lot but I can be "self-sufficient" when I need to be. While I obviously prefer sex over masturbation , I can readily switch between the two and still be satisfied so I have never gotten so desperate that I'm willing to cave in to their demands over the issue. I have had a previous partner that frequently tried this tactic or otherwise tried to use sex as a bribe and I frustrated her to no end by being un-phased by it. Ultimately, her use of this tactic was one of the factors that resulted in our relationship ending.

I find the tactic objectionable anyways. I feel like sex should be a separate issue from whatever issue we might be going through at the time. I know that sex isn't necessarily going to happen if we're pissed off at each other but I refuse to allow sex to be a commodity that can be bargained. It cheapens sex and cheapens my perception of my partner. I'm willing to talk and work things about but allowing sex to be a bargaining chip is never something that I've ever wanted to set as a precedent. I know different systems would work for different couples but I would never want to allow myself to be controlled in this manner.

I have also never have tried to use the tactic myself. Even ignoring my personal objections to the tactic, I have trouble saying "no" to sex when its be readily offered by my significant other.

 

witholding sex, atleast for me, is a deal breaker. it should not be used as a weapon, or negotiating tactic.

 

If it is in regards to the article, I know of situations where small communities have done that to force a resolution to a certain situation. It is not highly publicized or talked about, but it is something that is done in quiet in certain communities in certain situations.

As far as in a relationship I would agree with the majority of people it would be a major issue if done. Intimacy is not a weapon it is something that brings a couple closer.

 

No one has . done this with me and I haven't tried it either. If she does, I hope she does it before any real commitment so I can get out easily.

But honestly SOME women can be manipulative, do we always know?

 

It isn't just women who can manipulative, however I do beileve men can be manipulated by sex more easiy than women. Maybe because we don't fear pregnancy.

 

I personally Love Sex and Intimacy so that would be a Hell no ! I would never with hold sex for any reason,Knowing I want his parts just as much

 

I wish my wife was like that...