Tinder....

Ok, dude...you got to give yourself a break.
I've seen your pics, you're not bad at all, more than decent by comparison to many. Even handsome and built.

I'll put something out there, I'm 6.2 ...I've got 100K+ income, and so on...all listed out on the dating sites I belong too.
I'm not shy, been told I have a decent sense of humor...and so on. Bald, but I'm told it works for me.
So, I'm not saying this to toot my own horn, but to give perspective. (being truthful, but it still comes out egotistical no matter what you do)

I rarely get women approaching me online...and those who do...it doesn't click often, and it is passive at best.
If you're not in the mood to do some serious volume intro emails (which makes you feel like a schmuck because you're not focusing on one)
You will not get much play.

Same is true outside in the real world, even if you got your shit together, you won't get bites for some time.
You can't just whip it out, the "positives" list about you...you'll seem like a douche...and you can't protect yourself from "iffy" women.
And strangely enough, many are turned off by this. (as if you're pushing on them...nope, they need to figure it out themselves)

The players that often get play are this. Whip it out.
The approach the ladies, they do so often.
They really don't have any standards if you look close, they play everyone.
They're confident, bold,
compliment the lady often and overly (even if they don't mean it)
And they do it ALWAYS whether they are in mood or not...and to each and EVERY woman. It's like an OCD thing.
(My dad is like this, even some random clerk at a grocery store **Mom and him split when I was six)

Now, from what I've seen, the guys who don't do this, just want a nice date, a nice woman enjoying them as well. Sincere.
They tend to not get as much in volume.
Do not get me wrong, you don't have to be a player, you don't have to be a douche, you can be simply a "nice guy" who wants a "nice girl"
Which is what I am too.
BUT...simply from observation over time....and seeing the patterns and trends.
Ladies are not jumping out of the water for that worm...EVEN though they "say" they want this...AND are sincere about it.
It is a strange thing.

So, if you're a nice guy...and you want to get results...you're going to have to be patient...yet, fish with intent.
They mostly won't come to you.
You have to be willing to try, try, try again. Being on your A game...and being sincere. Everytime.

And this is difficult, because you're dealing with all the BS in your real life.
You have to be in the mood do it...and that doesn't happen everyday. You have to gear yourself up for it, it doesn't come "at hand".
It is a challenge. And it drives you crazy.
Because you're thinking...why don't they come after ME?? I'm a nice guy.
And you are.
BUT they don't tell you that. AND even if they do...they won't do something about it. (a rare thing IF they do)

So put on your top hat.
Gird up your loins.
Get your best shtick down.
And do it again...

Sooner or later, the fish will bite.
But the bitch part about it...you don't know if you want THAT fish.
And if you don't...or if it gets away...you'll just have to go fish again.
It's a crapshoot.

Most of us are all going through the same thing with you.
The online sites don't make it better...no matter what your "stats" are...it just increases your volume and area of potential.
No guarantees.

But give yourself a break...you've got the real deal.
You've just got to put it out there...and be lucky enough to find a lady YOU want...that recognizes it.
BTW...they're complaining about the same thing.

 

Oh man. My husband can be both. I wish he'd forget the second part.

 

Um, guys, chicks using something like Tinder would totally fuck a five.

 

It's simple logic. Think about it.

What kind of chick needs to use a fucking location app to find willing guys?

/betamaleontopofhisgame

 

If only there were an app that could actually filter out those issues.

Are we sitting on a gold mine here?

But seriously? I know next to nothing about dating, let alone online dating (I'm not exaggerating). Tinder just strikes me more as "DTF" than "LTR."

 

The difficulty is this...I've often heard to forget the "bad guy".
But then you do it...then subtly they get annoyed or turned-off. (without realizing they're doing it)
Then they're fantasizing about something/someone else... and then...

I agree with @StreetPattern, you have to be somehow both...and have the intuition or experience to know what when.
Try to be yourself...but also try to do both.

Who the hell set up this system???

 

Seriously.