Tilted Weaponry: Shrine of the Mall Ninja

Fantastic. Why don't they just put a dildo on each of the wire chin rests so he can mouth-palm it with his throat?

I know doing a SBR is a "huge hassle" but a basic 16" is more than fine and AR pistols are stupid toys.

That and what is he using? A ~11" barrel with flash hider? Thing is practically a carbine anyway. Pfft.

 

WARNING - INCOMING MALL NINJA GEAR LINK:

You know what operators need while operating?

Miniature SAPI plate wings on their M4 forearm.

 

jesus fucking christ. I'm sure those will feel real great banging against your body and nuts with a sling on.

On the other hand, if Kirstang hasn't maxed out his credit card yet for this month I'm sure we'll be seeing those soon on his desert camo FAL.

 

RE-RE-REMIX.

Sometimes you run into a pretty credible shooter that follows the indian-not-the-arrow philosophy to the Spartan-retarded extreme.

This is a prime example: "Why I wear flipflops while shooting."

Just... no.

 

Yeah I think I'll pass on that.

 

"I train like I fight." Pretty sure you should reevaluate your clothing philosophy then.

Ridiculous. I feel the same way about guys that wear shorts and tank tops to matches.

Why not go barefoot? I mean, really... that's totally the most Spart'tarded you can get.

 

Mmm, you know what my AR needs? More sharp edges to snag on shit and to stab me when it's slung.

Yes, check it out: The Lanco "Thigh Bayonet" Hand Stop: Because Sharp Edges are Tactical. As. Fuck.

 

This is the most mall ninja thing I've ever owned. 12+1 rounds of pump action glory.

 

Damnit, how did I miss TK posting in a gun thread here?

Come back to me.

 

If I was going to go full on mall ninja, I think something like this would be just the ticket.

 

That gun needs a RDIAS, bad.

 

Ah, the '80s.



Fantastic hipster AIWB draw (before it was cool!) plus scan & assess with unnecessary unload & show clear.

Shooting that fast in rubber exam gloves is no joke.

Wicked.

 

But the Haley appendix rig wasn't invented yet ! Unpossible !

 

Word on the street is that safety'd Mexican carry w/ 1911 is legit.

Seriously, though... that dude must have been a USPSAer. Sweet.

 

1911. Cocked, Locked, and Pointed at his jocks.

He was indeed, a USPSA Grandmaster: USPSA shooter on Miami Vice (TV, not the movie)

 

Mall Ninja Lingerie? 550 Cord Bikini

It's what preppers get for their hotties.

 

I watched that doomsday preppers show a few times. Definitely would not want to see those wives in any type of bikinis.

But hey, if you're a tactical prepper fatty your fantasy is the Yellowstone volcano erupts and all of a sudden the local college cheerleaders flock to you and your collection of mosin nagants still in the cosmoline. Then those 550 cord bikinis will come in real handy and you'll be laughing at all those poor fools who wasted their time going to college and putting money into their 401k. Cuz you were smarter than them, you knew that someday beautiful women would learn to appreciate $99 surplus Russian rifles.

 

I want to party with you so bad sometimes. Mostly when you're posting stuff like this because it's so. fucking. accurate.

...

Also, has anybody else here noticed how Full Retard, all-pistols-have-a-dozen-finishes Sig Sauer has gone lately? Seriously... check out the P238 line-up as an example. 21 different finishes. Holy amazeballs!

I would argue that if your production handgun is available in more than two colors (black and the current fad color [tan, gray]) that the manufacturer may need to reevaluate their basic production priorities.

 

Tacti-Fatties Galore. Transitions to Taco!