sex toys.

No I havent been a radio personality.....used to work for newspapers......only been on radio during a college class very briefly.

 

Amazon.com: Gun Oil 32oz Pump Bottle: Health & Personal Care

 

Why is it always about the girls? What about male toys? I feel sorry for you guys. I don't get why this world is so pro-vibrator but anti-pocket pussy. Yes, my man has one. Search wisely for a pocket pussy, steer clear of rubber go solely for silicone. Guys, you won't believe how it looks. The lips move back and forth just like in reality. When my man feels frisky, I use the PP on him, seriously it's quite a turn on fore both of us. Then I don't have to worry about girly stuff like shaving and the like. That's my tip, swallow your pride and buy yourself the male equivalent of a vibrator. It's totally worth it.

So about my newest vibrator acquisition: I splurged and tried one of the glass vibrators. It was a plastic vibe with a glass sleeve over top. I turned it on and the thing rattled so loud, I emailed the company and they were shocked to hear this. They tried one out for themselves then said they couldn't believe how loud it was! They let me send it back and they removed it from the catalog. I think it was so funny how I was the guinea pig experimenting with the first glass vibrator and it was a totally unexpected reaction to discover the rattle... anyway so I stick with regular vibrators from, now on. Beware people, watch the vibrators with glass sleeves over top, they sound like a jackhammer!

 

As a guy that once spent years of his life masturbating in some of the finest outhouses in Afghanistan and Iraq to sun-bleached American Curves magazines and laminated photos of his current girlfriend, the "Fleshlight" isn't something I really wanna drop money on. I've got hands and I've got a visual medium to stimulate arousal. If I don't have porn, I've got a healthy imagination that works just as well. For me and several billion other horny men out there, masturbation is mostly about getting off. I'm not trying to work on it for hours, not trying to build up pressure so I blow a hole in the ceiling, sure as hell not trying to "feel sexy" (whatever the fuck that is for a heterosexual man). I don't have an elastic crotch cavity to fill or a uvula-lookin' nanopenis to buzz; I've got something that can be easily manipulated by my hand. Men are visual creatures, we like things that look good, move good. It's why strip clubs stay in business. It's why every guy has a folder on his desktop labeled "PR0N." As far as what a guy wants to get off with, it would seem than an iPod Touch loaded with nasty pictures would almost always be preferred over a cold, alien "pocket pussy."

 

ummm....



I'm pretty sure the whole "then I don't have to worry about...shaving..." argument just took my chances of buying silicone lips to fuck from never to absolutely never


Call me crazy. We use sex toys during sex - not instead of it.

 

Rumor has it our rugged, you-name-it-can-do-it forefathers were laying some mighty pipe in ye olde bearded axe wound for thousands of years before the invention of the safety razor. I mean, between ChrisJericho literally waxing his dates' crotches in his mudroom before they're allowed to enter his Crossfit-Bateman bungalow to the airbrushed porn we come across today that makes it look like Pledge wood polish is now used as a personal care product, it's like women never had hair at all. I mean, we just recently discovered that they used to... you know... uhm... poop.

...or were you thinking about said hair on actual lips--like a legit Freddy Mercury mustache--instead of a patch above some labia and thus went into a dark, dark place kinda like the one featured in that rather ridiculous Frankie Goes to Hollywood video with all the assless chaps and green lasers.

...where are we going with this?​

 

I think she said she likes to get her guy off with the pocket pussy and that he likes it, too. What's the problem, yo.

 

My problem is with the term itself. I mean, really? Pocket pussy? Fuck, I can't even say that without cackling.

Also:

Not even gonna lie, I just imagined mixedmedia with a Freddy Mercury mustache jerking off a guy with a Fleshlight.

 

I can imagine worse things.

 

I have a Fleshlight. I also have an Aneros.

I don't use them all that much as I don't have a lot of time alone. I am usually good with just my hand and a little bit of porn or imagination. That said, toys can add some variety.

 

What is an aneros????


I have thought about buying a flesh light but dont want to waste my money...

 

Aneros

 

Hi ralphie250


Here's a link
Amazon.com: Aneros Progasm Prostate Stimulator, Black: Health & Personal Care


And here's a magnificent Amazon dot Com review by Staff Sgt. Kelvin C. Tovar.
He should be invited to join TFP

 

...I can't put my dick in those. And I drive a lesbian car, so I can't really talk about the virtues of gas-guzzling 'Merican Luxury automobiles.

...

I generally think that wealth isn't a sex toy, it's a shitty pickup line that works on a lot of women.

 

First: Welcome back.

Second: My issue wasn't so much about the pubic area having hair. I'm not so opposed to hair that it bothers me that much. Do I prefer waxed smooth with the exception of a landing strip or design? Yes. Does it really matter? No, not so much. Let's put this down to bad framing of my thoughts since I was in about 100 places at once in mah head.

What I couldn't wrap my head around was the whole "When my man is feeling frisky, I use the PP on him...then I don't have to worry about the girly stuff" point. I got several impressions out of that. 1. While I love the use of sex toys before, during and after sex, that statement made it seem as though
"Yo. I'm horny. Come spit on mah balls"
"Fuck that shit, stick it inside this fake pussy"
"But...but...I wanna stab your face with my meat stave"
"Piss off. Mah beaver is getting her winter coat."
"Your beaver is on your face? wtf?"
"I don't wanna be girly. My lips are girly"
"Pweeeease?"
*angry eye*
*sulk* *lube* *squeek-squeek-squeek* *ahhh*


Then, I thought - ok, maybe she just does it when she hasn't shaved because she/her man/both prefer the "pledge" look and feel. I can understand that. It just struck me as odd at the moment.

Then, I thought - if I ever get to the point where a rubber pussy is more appealing than the real thing, I'm moving in with the_jazz.

That was when my mind fell off the deep end. I still haven't fully recovered.

 

What is the proper way to use a flesh light? Lube it up and go for it?