Pointless Announcements

Hey noodle ...

 

"System out of memory exception" doesn't sound right when opening a text file...

 

Didn't get the job. The lady just thought I deserved a personal phone call.

 

There are times we need a "dislike button". Like this:



Sorry that you didn't get it. I had my fingers crossed.

 

Thanks...that was oddly sweet. What do you want?

 

I heard he is looking for a new place to bury the bodies "taken care of" on the west coast.

 

Sorry to hear, ZombieSquirrel. You know what you have to do, right?

 

Drink the blood of my enemies from a guiness glass?

 

I'm a little upset about an event at work. No one at home to talk to about it.

Working with pets has reinforced my initial impression that, as a nurse, I don't want to treat patients that are too young, too old or otherwise unable to understand what is happening to them. I mean, that is my preference. I realize that that I won't always have a choice in that matter.

ugh, i need to cry and take a nap.

 

Here a 'like' is so illfitted. I feel you, try talking to your pet or a stuffed animal. It might make you feel better.

 

If Victoria's Secret is like taking the girls to the spa, trying on sports bras is like taking them to visit Buffalo Bill.

 

Oh, you.

 

Buffalo Bill the showman or Buffalo Bill the serial killer?

Or do you mean Jack Kemp or Jim Kelly? I'm confused.

 

It puts the lotion.... Really?

Either, I guess, though I was referring to the tortuous image of tucking things uncomfortably. But, a wrangler wrestling animals with their own minds into submission works, too.

 

That explains it. I was torn between imagining your boobs entertaining the great unwashed masses who arrived for an afternoon's frivolity on the streetcar and will be on their way home once the gaslights come on or imaging Jodie Foster stalking them in the dark while they watch her with night-vision goggles.

The prevailing vision, though, was your boobs chasing down Leon Lett to save a meaningless touchdown in a blowout Superbowl.

/ uncle phil, that one's for you.
// now I'm sad.

 

Here’s a bumper sticker I’d like to see: “We are the proud parents of a child who’s self-esteem is sufficient that he doesn’t need us promoting his minor scholastic achievements on the back of our car.”​