I can't be around you if...

I can pretty much steal this one and add a bit. I'm fine with religions and dissenting opinions; but learn when to shut up. The first words out of my mouth when we disagree will be "What is your better idea?". Please have one or STFU.

I'm an active outdoors kind of guy. If that doesn't interest you, just move on. I will always prefer to do something, rather than watch something.

I like Molly more than I like most people. If shedding, and competitive slobbering offend you, it isn't going to work.

 

OK. Dog people.

Your dogs shed. They pee on people. Some even go as far as biting. I can't help but lump most if not all of those advocating for animals in the same category as my friend who doesn't pick up after her dog and blames the person who's been pee'd/bitten/ shed on for said peeing/biting and shedding. That said, I don't think all dogs are trained equally. I will give your dog ONE chance at a first impression before writing you off as lesser human being.

I don't hate animals. I hate human animals.

 

I pick up after my dog and he has never peed on a person. I don't even let him pee on fire hydrants because I think that someone might come along and touch it that day. As far as I can tell from my breadth of experience with humans and public bathrooms, it's people who seem to have the most trouble figuring out where it is appropriate to pee.

 

It's a rebuilding year... I mean, decade.

(Wait, I guess I don't have to give a shit about the Vols anymore, do I?)

/threadjack

 

Molly drools and sheds, it comes with the territory if you own a Newf. I brush her daily and take her to the beauty parlor twice a year; but if you get near her you will get fur and probably drool on you. This ought to be obvious when you look at her. Don't approach and pet her if you are offended by drool or hair.

I'm not aware that she's ever pissed on anyone. She has an incredible bladder, I'd have to drink a six-pack to compete.

As far as biting goes, she has pretty good taste. The only person she ever wanted to bite kicked her brother. I wanted to bite him, too; but restrained Molly. If you don't fuck with her family, Molly is as docile as it gets.

 

I stopped at this post. I'll read the rest later...

Just had to insert - there is NOTHING innocent about you Borla!

 

That goes for cats too. I don't get why people spend so much money on pets and it limits how easily it is for you to travel.

Being overweight is the other big one I have. If you don't feel comfortable enough to wear a bikini on the beach or walk around the house naked, then it won't work. I also exercise a lot and ride a bike for transportation across town.

 

I'd have to agree. I work at a university and I am consistently amazed at the fact that of the roughly 700-800 "gentlemen" who populate the building throughout the week and have likely* had the better part of two decades to learn the basics of "point your penis at the water, then start peeing," yet manage to leave me wondering if what I'm seeing is a lapse in hygiene or some sort of art installation.

 

for that reason i pee standing in public restrooms and sitting at home.

 

I prefer not to be around people who swear at others. General conversation is not what I mean. Men yelling & swearing at women or children are an immediate & permanent turn off. A six-foot man rushing toward a woman and kids while yelling and swearing, is more than rude. Been there, not going back.

I am a gun owner. I will always be a gun owner. It is an absolute deal breaker if I receive any kind of flack about this. When my ex was gone with the Army, I have had to shove my three girls behind my bed, load 2 fire arms, and listen for the sound of footsteps coming up the stairs when I heard someone break into my house. No, he did not come upstairs, so yes, he got away. If you think for ANY reason I do not have the right to protect my children in this manner, we are 100% incompatible.

If your Beach Boys and Credence Clearwater Revival collections are not larger than mine, that would be a deal breaker. Because that would most likely mean you will complain too much when I listen to it every single blessed time I climb into my truck.

Speaking of trucks ... Bad mouthing my truck is a deal breaker. And she is a big-ass truck. She is old like I am, and has spent her life hauling the family, trailers, my tractor, and fancy schmancy little cars out of trouble. It would be great if you had one of your own (I occasionally break my tow straps) Hell, a kind man with manners, a firearm, a truck, tractor, and extensive CCR/Beach boys collection would probably melt my heart.

 

I can't be around you if you have no interest in good food, or at least a little curiosity and willingness to try new things.
So if we're in Manhattan and you want to go eat at Applebee's, I won't be going with you.

 

I have so many rules that I have no friends...(Mixedmedia's list is a good starter) Good thing I'm an introvert, or I'd be lonely.

Lots of things bother me, I get that from my family, most of which are extroverts, but they are picky and complainy about other people's faults, constantly.

Once you get into my small circle I will put up with a lot of crap though. There are few deal breakers at that point. People do change, and I realize I am slightly off myself.

 

i dont curse in front of my own kids or in front of anyone elses kids. in fact ive never cursed out aloud inside my own house (except to myself of course).

If you decide to curse in front of my kids, ill make sure to let you know, and we probably wont be hanging out again.

 

Oh my god itwasme is SO country! It's SOOOOOO adorbs!

She probably says "Oh, bless your heart" when she means "You dimwit!".

 

I'm a little bit surprised about the terminology ITT. For me, there is a gap between "I can't be around you/I won't be hanging out with you" and "I want a relationship with you."

In other words, deal breakers for my friends might not be as strict as a relationship.

 

Right. In the OP, I said friends and/or relationship, but it went to mostly relationships!

 

Mine pretty much go for both types of relationships. The CCE and Beach Boys are negotiable for friends. The bit about poking fun at my truck or tractor is not. I realize my tractor is small and can't harvest a field without some attachments and vitamins. But she is good for mowing and rototilling. And great for joy riding. Locally of course.

 

I actually don't mind hanging around people I can't stand, for a very good reason: the words that spill from their mouths are comedy gold, and the entertainment value of this is simply beyond computation!





If that's the price I have to pay to bring you people new material, so be it.