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Bf is on the small side, will sexual intercourse suck?

Discussion in 'Tilted Life and Sexuality' started by chelle, Sep 13, 2011.

  1. Baraka_Guru

    Baraka_Guru Möderätor Staff Member

    Location:
    Toronto
    I hear you take armpits fo' free.
     
  2. Plan9

    Plan9 Rock 'n Roll

    Location:
    Earth
    Okay, so why aren't they in your purse? Are you gonna fuck this dude or what? He's got needs for miles even if he's only packing a 3.5" Action Figure.
     
  3. the_jazz

    the_jazz Accused old lady puncher

    No way. Changing room at the parasol store.
     
    • Like Like x 1
  4. Plan9

    Plan9 Rock 'n Roll

    Location:
    Earth
    My secret fantasy is to find a woman that'll let me hit all three in one session.

    You know. The armpits, behind the knees and finish up with a good chin tuck.

    Oh, baby.
     
    Last edited: Apr 22, 2012
    • Like Like x 1
  5. the_jazz

    the_jazz Accused old lady puncher

    You're an excellent hands-folder, aren't you?

    (yes, I'm stealing that line)
     
  6. Plan9

    Plan9 Rock 'n Roll

    Location:
    Earth
    I'm a crackerjack hands-folder.

    Holy shit...

    Did you just quote Richard Bachman?

    :eek:
     
  7. Remixer

    Remixer Middle Eastern Doofus

    Location:
    Frankfurt, Germany
    McDonald's restroom. That's the stuff.

    Makes her feel not cheap at all, too!
     
    • Like Like x 1
  8. the_jazz

    the_jazz Accused old lady puncher

    No, some douche named Crompsin accused me of that back at 4.0. I'm stealing it from him.
    --- merged: Sep 30, 2011 6:15 PM ---
    Not classy enough. Port-a-potty at the polo grounds?
     
    • Like Like x 1
  9. Plan9

    Plan9 Rock 'n Roll

    Location:
    Earth
    Oh. Had me scared there for a minute, Skinner. Serious deja vu.
     
  10. Remixer

    Remixer Middle Eastern Doofus

    Location:
    Frankfurt, Germany
    German pig farm. Right there in the muddy goodness. Awesome for your skin, to boot!
     
  11. the_jazz

    the_jazz Accused old lady puncher

    Apparently you've never been anywhere near a pig farm. Or, if you have, you're the smell-equivalent of blind.

    Under the stage at a John Tesh concert?
     
  12. Remixer

    Remixer Middle Eastern Doofus

    Location:
    Frankfurt, Germany
    Aren't we naming the worst possible place to fuck a date? How can a Josh Tesh concert be worse and cheaper than a pig farm?!
     
  13. Plan9

    Plan9 Rock 'n Roll

    Location:
    Earth
    Wait a second...

    *wonders how many women have measured his dick using improv methods such as their palm, nose, throat, etc.*
     
  14. the_jazz

    the_jazz Accused old lady puncher

    It's not the "worst place" because chelle is much too classy for any of your suggestions. It's "places that a classy lady like chelle would find herself in the mood and ready to go except for that missing condom".

    "Missing condom".... heh. I'm going to go wander around 4.0 for a while.
     
    • Like Like x 2
  15. Mouth and throat...best ways to measure.
     
    • Like Like x 3
  16. Plan9

    Plan9 Rock 'n Roll

    Location:
    Earth
    Yeah, but I always get stuck between their teeth. What's the trick there?
     
  17. Wrap the lips under the teeth a bit. Or suck on it like a straw. Just depends on whatever is most comfortable.
     
  18. the_jazz

    the_jazz Accused old lady puncher

    Wow a gay joke and Glory's Sun, Lordeden or I were involved.

    Isn't that against the TFP rules?
     
  19. Wait, I thought it was against the rules if you boys are NOT involved.
     
  20. Plan9

    Plan9 Rock 'n Roll

    Location:
    Earth
    ...I can't even make tiny dick jokes anymore. The homosexual sodomy jokes have totally taken over. Even the girls are doing it.
     
    • Like Like x 3