Adult Science Jokes

Is Barime plural or a rhetorical statement??

 

Actually, funny thing is...I've gotten past beer.

 

And that's a lot...

 

A mathematician and a physicist agree to a psychological experiment.

The mathematician is put in a chair in a large empty room and a beautiful naked woman is placed on a bed at the other end of the room.
The psychologist explains, "You are to remain in your chair.
Every five minutes, I will move your chair to a position halfway between its current location and the woman on the bed."

The mathematician looks at the psychologist in disgust. "What? I'm not going to go through this.
You know I'll never reach the bed!" And he gets up and storms out.

The psychologist makes a note on his clipboard and ushers the physicist in.

He explains the situation, and the physicist's eyes light up and he starts drooling.
The psychologist is a bit confused.
"Don't you realize that you'll never reach her?"

The physicist smiles and replied, "Of course! But I'll get close enough for all practical purposes!"



gotta love Zeno...

 

Now that's what I call a good yolk...

 

Keep it real...

 

KISS principle

 

A businessman needed to employ a quantitative type person.
He wasn't sure if he should get a mathematician, an engineer, or an applied mathematician.
As it happened, all the applicants were male. The businessman devised a test.

The mathematician came first...
Miss How, the administrative assistant took him into the hall.
At the end of the hall, lounging on a couch, was a beautiful woman.

Miss How said, "You may only go half the distance at a time. When you reach the end, you may kiss our model."
The mathematician explained how he would never get there in a finite number of iterations and politely excused himself.

Then came the engineer...
He quickly bounded halfway down the hall, then halfway again, and so on.
Soon he declared he was well within accepted error tolerance and grabbed the beautiful woman and kissed her.

Finally it was the applied mathematician's turn...
Miss How explained the rules.
The applied mathematician listened politely, then grabbed Miss How and gave her a big smooch.
"What was that about?" she cried.
"Well, you see I'm an applied mathematician.
If I can't solve the problem, I change it!"


Now, that's my type of solution.

 

Now that's a body of data to analyze...

 

I feel lighter too.

 

Mondays...

 

Purist.