50 Shades of Grey

My current girlfriend mentioned this while we were out yesterday. I'm curious, considering the audience is overwhelmingly female... exactly how much and how kinky is this sex? I've read romance novels before (What? It was Afghanistan. I was bored.) and they're all basically the same flowery missionary position with a stoic built like a coffin. The whole bored housewife Twilight porn thing going on these days is very amusing though.

 

Well, I won't be satisfied unless he throws out a "C'mon, baby... spit on it..." as part of the steamy foreplay.

 

Plan9, its more than "his throbbing manhood pierced her maiden head" lol

 

Really? I'll be the judge of that. I think I'm going to borrow this smut from one of my current girlfriend's girlfriends and read it.

I'm just going to throw it out there that at no point will there be giddyup ass slapping or anyone's thumb in anyone else's butt.

And, yeah, I'll eat my hat if I discover otherwise.

 

Could you please start a thread where you write your thoughts on the book as you read it? I have a feeling it would be AMAZING!

 

Really? Hah... that would be a pretty funny thread.

Anybody else interested?

 

We could all read along. It should be dubbed "Niner's Book Club." You could read a silly book every so often and we could read along. Or not.

I don't care if anyone else is interested. This is for MY entertainment! Haven't you people learned that TFP is all about me?

 

Fair enough, but my point about their emotions and motifs being realistic stands.

 

I 2nd this lol

 

I want to see a Baraka-Niner book club thread and get their perspectives on pop chick lit. It would be epic.

 

Hell yes. But I keep seeing more Jay and Silent Bob, no matter how hard I try to envision you two debating trashy chick lit.

 

Baraka_Guru and Plan9 MAKE THIS HAPPEN!

What was this thread about again?

/threadjack

 

Snoochie booches.

 

This is going around facebook in the UK as a take off for 50 shades.
Its called 50 SHADES OF CHAV.

​

 

FYI, I read a couple of chapters standing around a Barnes and Noble. It was atrociously bad writing. I could crap better sex fic than this. Unbelievably flat, two-dimensional characters, badly named and badly described, having badly choreographed ouchie-sex. Granted, I don't care for BDSM fic, but at least Anne Rice's stuff was decently written, with comparatively believable characters doing incredibly unsexy things to one another.

I can't believe anyone is paying money for these books. I have literally read better stuff for free at ASSTR.org, and that stuff is probably written by 17 year olds, typed one-handed with a box of kleenex next to the keyboard.

 

For what it's worth, I finished the third/last book of the series last night. The three books were what I expected - quick, simple reads based around a less-than-realistic but definitely sexy relationship and their encounters. Maybe I'm strange, but I don't expect completely realistic, entirely factually-correct stories when I read *fiction.* I don't expect it from TV shows, either, and these books fulfilled a similar purpose to TV for me - entertainment that I can pick up at random times and spend an hour or two (or five..) letting myself be absorbed. Books just allow a bit more imagination, which I appreciate at times.

This series was a brain break for me, time off from textbooks and seriousness and learning and facts. I don't give a damn that the writing could be better or that the sex isn't "real" BDSM.. it was entertaining and still sexy, and I don't blame myself or other people for liking it.