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innovis 07-26-2005 08:34 PM

Ladies: Attraction to men
 
I'm wondering what simple things could most men do to make themselves more attractive in general, or not do to make themselves less attractive. Lists/descriptions would be good.

Not necessarily talking about sexually attractive, although that is probably a good subcatagory.

maleficent 07-26-2005 09:07 PM

a few things:
1. Pay attention to the little things - and this could be a bazillion different things depending on the moment -- paying attention (for both sexes) is important.
2. My eyes are that area above my nose and below my forehead
3. Laugh
4. Please, please please... Know what my name is by the end of the first date...

Sugarmouse 07-26-2005 10:49 PM

sexual confidence...by which i mean..if a guy thinks he is sexy chances are i will aswell..unless of course he is a complete munter. :lol:


hving said that..if he has long hair he could be a munter and chances are iwould still twitch on clapping eyes onhim!!

lastly...make it obvious you like women:)so much sex appeal comes from within :lol:

mandy 07-27-2005 01:20 AM

ii'd go for the hands.good, CLEAN nice looking hands.not manicured or anything just neat.no dirt under the finger nails, that type of stuff. i mean , would you like a guy to touch you with ugly dirty hands?

then i'd go with paying attention to when you speak thats always a great turn on. to know the guy is totally interested in what you saying and you can see it.he's not just doing it for the sake of doing it.

his eyes.dreamy, smokey, loving "i would like to kiss you" eyes.

and last but certainly not least, his mouth and everything concerning that area...the way he forms words, the way he talks , the sound of his voice and the way he smiles when he sees you.

Blonddie 07-28-2005 09:32 PM

Confidence, a little cockiness (I mean attitude), and a bit aloof. These are good when you first meet to peak her interest. Most women don't really go for someone who seems desperate, or clingy.
ps-- smell good too! I recommend a good body wash- not too strong, but still there.

minyn 07-28-2005 09:54 PM

1. listen. and when you do, genuinely care. create a response, create a question, we want you to make us think and show you are doing the same. real interest in our lives is amazing.

2. try to be in our world. dont make us change, and we wont make you change. just incorporate us into your life as we want to do for you.

3. smile and laugh, A LOT. at us, at yourself, at life and its ironies and inconsistancies. be goofy, make life lighthearted like it should be.

4. Be happy, plain and simple. it rubs off, its circular.

5. The power of non-sexual touch is amazing. our shoulders, back, and those little and often underappreciated places on our bodies are unnoticed and when they are given attention, it makes the hair on us stand up and makes us notice

Meridae'n 08-12-2005 06:24 PM

1. Go up and introduce yourself to a girl you fancy.
2. Be confident.
3. Make her laugh.
4. Don't make a dick of yourself.
5. For god's sake make sure you follow #1.
6. Do all this BEFORE you get wasted.

Grasshopper Green 08-12-2005 07:00 PM

Hygiene. Nothing is worse than someone who doesn't brush their teeth, use deodorant, or wash their clothes on a regular basis.

Camstyn 08-12-2005 10:51 PM

Looks like we're fucked, boys.

08-13-2005 05:59 AM

Hmmm,

Some of these are regarding first impressions (eg: we have not met yet) and some could be applied to a first date. Im not really as picky as it may seem, but these would be my "desires"...

*Clean, fresh smelling with a touch of aftershave or cologne
*Clothing neat, clean and matched. Should be appropriate for the outing. Dont go "Queer Eye" on me though
*Casual conversation good but please dont over do it by thinking you have to talk ALL the time. Silent moments are good times for sweet looks, body positioning and relaxing. Keep chat light and ask me questions about myself too, nothing intimate/too personal at first. If you ask me a question I respond to and want to talk about...LISTEN, and maybe, ask further questions relating.
*I agree with the "confidence" thing...nearing cocky but not arriving there.
*BE A GENTELMAN and open the friggin DOOR!
*No cling'ons but let me/her know there is interest.
*Smile! Laughing is good too
*Shy is ok as long as you can still breathe and talk some
*Introduce me to friends if weve just met and they are around
*At least appear social and somewhat adjusted..if you fake it fine too re: shy
*Eye contact is good
*dont get blasted on the first meeting/date!!!
*If I want sex on the first date, I will let you know. If I am agreeable to sex on the first date...I prob am planning to make the event a one night stand.
*I like intelligent men. If you are stupid, shut up re: talk but keep it light
*I LOVE long hair on men as long as its tamed. If you are mostly bald, you should not try to wear it long IMO
*Walking... do this with confidence and good posture. Head up. A touch of strut is good
*If you are a smoker (as am I) dont blow smoke in my face or chain smoke please
*Please refrain from ranting about exes, work, money or what ever else ails you
*Please refrain from gum chewing or chewing tobacco. I chew gum but its rude while you are speaking to someone (until you are married of course...lol)
*I even like it when a "new to me" man sorta establishes a claim on me if we are in a gathering. Not to the point that I feel I have to tear myself away to speak to others but just showing strong interest. Now, please, dont hang on me... but dont appear flirty with other women in my presence! Exception: if I say something along the lines of "nice to meet you and hope we get to chat again soon" right after we met...Im still looking dear. For someone ELSE.

I could go on but...im already starting to sound like there are too many criteria. Guess I coulda broken this down to DATE or MEET..but you guys should be able to figure it out :)

abaya 08-13-2005 06:47 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by minyn
1. listen. and when you do, genuinely care. create a response, create a question, we want you to make us think and show you are doing the same. real interest in our lives is amazing.
-snip-
5. The power of non-sexual touch is amazing. our shoulders, back, and those little and often underappreciated places on our bodies are unnoticed and when they are given attention, it makes the hair on us stand up and makes us notice

I very much agree with these two points. Genuine curiousity and interest, demonstrated by precise questions that show you are listening and care about the details. I find it incredibly sexy and makes me want to fuck the questioner almost immediately... I feel attractive, interesting, smart, and sexy all at once.

Same goes for the second point... when my bf kisses my forehead gently, just standing on the street or something, it turns me on so much more than a deliberately sexual touch. Reaching for my ass or crotch might be playful, but it won't get me in bed like a few simple, caring touches/kisses will.

Anything else?... just BE an interesting person yourself. Be confident, or at least be honest about how dorky and goofy you can be. I love both of those characteristics at different times, in my bf. :)

whoamg 07-24-2007 01:31 AM

BE A MAN.
be strong, masculine, tough.
don't insist on wearing our girly underwear.
exert manly attributes, and leave the dramatics for the girls.

Nisses 07-24-2007 03:02 AM

another tip: BE ON TIME :)

last post was 2 years ago whoamg :)

Plan9 07-24-2007 03:42 AM

This is where stereotype fun comes in!

Men trying to get women: Wearing boxer shorts made of credit cards.

Women: Wearing a robe made out of T-bone steaks and football tickets.

abaya 07-24-2007 04:04 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by whoamg
BE A MAN.
be strong, masculine, tough.
don't insist on wearing our girly underwear.
exert manly attributes, and leave the dramatics for the girls.

Are you kidding me? Other than "insisting on wearing our girly underwear," (??) acting like any of the other "attributes" you mention would be a serious turn off to me, and only increases the pressure on men to conform to societal expectations. I simply don't agree.

Eh, I already answered this thread earlier (two years ago!!), but I'll add a striking sense of humor (not a sarcastic or mean one), and a willingness to smile. Also, smoking sucks ass and is the biggest turn-off I've ever encountered. Unsexiest thing ever. I used to be bothered by poor posture, but have since gotten over it, for the most part. And keep up your end of the conversation... initiative goes a long way in displaying confidence (though being a chatterbox does not).

hagatha 07-24-2007 04:33 AM

I think what this thread displays is that its very much to taste.
But I think there are basics that everyone can agree on:

Good hygiene, open communication and kindness. The rest is pretty much an individual preference.

Plan9 07-24-2007 09:26 AM

MORE LIKE: What attracts humans to humans.

snowy 07-24-2007 10:23 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Crompsin
MORE LIKE: What attracts humans to humans.

Pretty much. What people find attractive in a mate has some universal characteristics.

I doubt few people are attracted to dirty, lazy, spineless men or women.

The_Jazz 07-24-2007 10:33 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by onesnowyowl
I doubt few people are attracted to dirty, lazy, spineless men or women.

While I agree with the sentiment, the continued pedistalization of Paris Hilton and Britney Spears fly in the face of what is otherwise a very logical statement.

One thing that I've discovered in my years is that 45% of the American population (straight males) believe that it is actually possible to polish a turd solong as the turd has long blonde hair and a cute face.

ruggerp11 07-24-2007 12:11 PM

In my experience, all you have to do is be a gentleman, be polite, be interested and interesting.

Adri 07-24-2007 12:32 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by The_Jazz
While I agree with the sentiment, the continued pedistalization of Paris Hilton and Britney Spears fly in the face of what is otherwise a very logical statement.

One thing that I've discovered in my years is that 45% of the American population (straight males) believe that it is actually possible to polish a turd solong as the turd has long blonde hair and a cute face.


This is probably a question for a new thread (unless one already exists)... but:

Since everyone (including me) seems to agree with you re: Paris & Britney & Lindsey, etc, WHY DO THEY GET SO MUCH PRESS TIME? Who likes them? Honestly?

Back to the thread topic:

I agree with you re: straight males wanting to polish blonde turds... However, unfortunately, in my experience (and those of my friends), it's usually the other way around. Women seem to have the idea that they can turn any man into the Perfect Man with just a few little changes here or there.

We should all learn to like each other for who/what we are.

Plan9 07-24-2007 12:34 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by The_Jazz
While I agree with the sentiment, the continued pedistalization of Paris Hilton and Britney Spears fly in the face of what is otherwise a very logical statement.

One thing that I've discovered in my years is that 45% of the American population (straight males) believe that it is actually possible to polish a turd solong as the turd has long blonde hair and a cute face.

Damn straight, bro.

...and this is why I don't even date blondes.

Too many polished turds in the pool.

While I know hair color has nothing to do with anything... I have yet to meet a blonde chick that I could be with for more than a night or two of primal pumping.

jorgelito 07-24-2007 07:05 PM

most blondes are fake blondes.....

match000 07-24-2007 09:14 PM

Stop caring about things that you have to force yourself to behave like.

Be yourself but a polite subdued version. If it clicks, it clicks? No sense faking it imho.. all this is far easier to say than follow, of course. It is human nature to want to make the best impression we think we can make ;)

Jam 07-24-2007 11:11 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Camstyn
Looks like we're fucked, boys.

:paranoid:

Plan9 07-25-2007 07:48 PM

Human Nature?
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by match000
Stop caring about things that you have to force yourself to behave like.

Be yourself but a polite subdued version. If it clicks, it clicks? No sense faking it imho.. all this is far easier to say than follow, of course. It is human nature to want to make the best impression we think we can make ;)

Ergh, I'd suggest it is human nature to, "put your dick in the hole".

Impetuous1 07-26-2007 05:21 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ruggerp11
In my experience, all you have to do is be a gentleman, be polite, be interested and interesting.

That's always worked for me. It's always a pleasant surprise to find a man who doesn't try to use games and treats you with respect.

Kpax 07-28-2007 02:03 PM

Yeah, sincerity has worked for me, too.

OK so not really, but of all things, I think I've gotten closest with just being on the outside what I am on the inside. I'm not too good at acting or putting on my "game." Not much of one anyway.

Plan9 07-28-2007 05:21 PM

Yeah, I got game like Micheal Jordon in baseball.

Hyacinthe 07-28-2007 11:56 PM

Ok things that attract me to a guy

1. Confidence - I like a guy that will just walk up say "Hi I'm Mike - nice to meet you, can I buy you a drink?" It's honest, upfront, says that he's interested and I just hate it when I am out with male friends and they spend 30min staring at one girl and are too afraid to approach her. Girls are primarily the same as guys, if you wouldn't freak out if a girl did that to you I doubt she will, to me there's no real need for pick lines or elaborate plots to get her attention, seriously the worst that can happen is she'll say no, the sky's not going to fall in or something.

2. Respect me and my space - Nothing I hate more then someone I barely know calling me love, sweety, darling etc etc it really pisses me off. My family and friends don't call me that so if you do after 10min or so I assume you're looking for a one nighter and cbf remembering my name. Also I am NOT I repeat not a PDA type of girl, a hand on the small or my back or around my waist occasionally is good I love that but don't hang all over me when I am trying to talk to someone or try to keep both arms around me when I am trying to walk - it's difficult and irritating and I prefer to be thought of as an individual rather then half of a siamese twin

3. Subtlety - If you're going to check me out do it without me noticing, I get seriously tired of guys staring at my chest if I wear something the slightest bit low cut. Yes I know you'll look, yes I expect you to, but I also expect you to be talking to my fact rather then my bra.

Physically well long as the guy is clean and neat I'm generally happy same as the others (though I will admit a touch of shadow from a beard on a square jawline makes my knees feel a little weak).

MrFriendly 07-29-2007 12:10 AM

Hey, I've got a question for the ladies on the whole touching thing.

A few have mentioned they quite like innocent touching. Like on the arm and such. But what I want to know is when? At what point is it appropriate for a guy you barely know but are attracted to to do that?

Hyacinthe 07-29-2007 12:18 AM

For me right away if it's something small like a hand on my back when we're walking down stairs or going through a narrow doorway, or a hand brushing my upper arm or resting on my shoulder for a moment to get my attention cause I'm talking to someone and they don't want to interrupt or there's loud music playing. Even something as intimate as brushing hair out of my face can be nice (as long as he doesn't poke me in the eye or something) or holding my hand while he leads me across the room to introduce me to his friends.

That help?

Mugzy6 07-29-2007 02:12 AM

1. Smile
2. Be polite (holding doors and such things may be old-fashioned, but they're sweet)
3. Try your best to get along with the family, if you get to that point
4. Compliments are always nice
5. Tell her you love her as often as you feel it

Lasereth 07-29-2007 04:13 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Camstyn
Looks like we're fucked, boys.

I laughed out loud :thumbsup:

The Magic 07-29-2007 07:46 AM

1. Remember to slouch everywhere you walk or while sitting if you're even just slightly taller than average. This way you don't look threatening to the women.

2. Remember to play your strengths such as physical fitness or intelligence:
Like, if you work out a lot, every time a guy walks through the front doors make sure to point out to your date you can "take him on". Even if you just run/bike a lot and don't have muscles, it's ok because it shows the woman you're confident.
If you think you're strength is your intelligence, remind your date every 5 minutes how hard it is to find an intelligent woman who can keep up with your thinking. Make sure to correct her in any way possible and remind her of how smart you are (women love confidence and also when you always talk about yourself).

3. Always change the subject to you. If she says anything, reply with "That reminds me of this one frat party where Joe, Peter, and I...."

4. If you have any faults at all, make sure to always blame them on your mother and remind your date that your mother ruined your life. This is good because:
a. Sticking it to the man (metaphorically) lets the woman know you don't take shit from no one (confidence!).
b. She'll know you're an adult who doesn't need mommy and daddy anymore.
c. Women LOVE to hear their dates talk about other women, especially their date's mom (why do you think women gossip so much).

5. If there's ever a moment of silence and you two are looking straight into each other's eyes, make sure to defiantly stare down at her breasts then to let her know what you're after.


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