Strap-on deflowering - Tilted Forum Project Discussion Community

ktspktsp · 02-09-2005, 10:23 PM

Hello people,

My girlfriend and I ordered a strap-on kit recently, and when I see her in a couple of days she will use it on me. Now, we've tried rimming, a finger in the ass, and a butt plug (actually a sort of bead-shaped plug thingy), and that felt good, but I haven't tried anything larger. So, any suggestions (ex, positions, preparation), comments, stories would be welcome!

Thanks

Ambiguity · 02-09-2005, 11:05 PM

Bend over and take it like a man. Eh, woman. Whatever. There's a reason they say dont drop the soap. But whatever turns you on man. If you guys have already played around with other things, then I wouldnt imagine this would be any different, except both her hand are free... If your into the role playing thing, wear some of her underwear, maybe a bra...? Have her call you her b*tch while she's givin' it to ya doggy style maybe? The strangest things turn us guys on, I'll attest to that, although for me it's not being screwed by my girlfriend in the ass. Maybe being licked on the ass.... But thats a far cry from being her b*tch. Huh. Let us know how it goes? She going to have anything pleasuring her while she's behind you pounding away? Take it easy on the knees though, I found that out the hard way the other night. The longer you kneel, even on a soft bed, damn... I could barely make it down the stairs to get my girlfriend a glass of water after all her yelling and screaming.... Which some would say makes me her b*tch.... but in a totally different way than taking it in the ass from her... Yeah.....

Let us know how it goes though, yeah?

GoldenOuroboros · 02-09-2005, 11:29 PM

Sounds like you in for alot of fun..

Take it slow and use lots of lube (no personal experience just from what I've heard about anal sex in general). And if you end up liking it perhaps get her a strap on that has a vib built in or something.
*checks link*
Probably go the thin one first.. well.. that'd be my choice

and as Ambiguity said.. let us know how it goes

GakFace · 02-09-2005, 11:29 PM

I find it so funny how so many guys are all for fucking a woman in the ass, but then when the question is turned on them.. "oh no, exit only!" How does it make the man gay but perfectly hetero for the woman... Such a stupid rule. People need to get secure in their sexuality so such trivial things can be looked into.

I'm sorry Ambiguity, but your post sounds pretty condecending.

ktspktsp, sorry but I don't know a thing to help you out. All I can say is that a strap-on will involve a LOT more area for friction so make sure to have LOTS of lube so that it goes in smoothly. Aside from that I know nothing, lemmie know how it goes tho! And Kudos for having a girlfriend who is open to such possibilies.

ironmaiden7o7 · 02-09-2005, 11:38 PM

I like how comfortable you are with this. It's good to be open minded when in a relationship. I know many might say that it's great to have a girlfriend who is open to such possibilities, but I think you are the one that needs the bows here. YOU are the one who is letting her do this to YOU. Much respect. Take it easy at first and I am sure after a while, you'll be fine. As long as you like it, it will be great, and let me know how it goes also! Good luck!

Ambiguity · 02-09-2005, 11:53 PM

Condecending? Not at all... In fact, I believe I said whatever turns him on. I've never been a fan of that argument though, the whole "guys wanna fuck a woman in the ass, but when the question is turned on them "oh no, exit only!" thing, mainly because women dont have dicks. If women had dicks and vagina's, and guys had vagina's and dicks, then we would be on equal footing. But to have sex/make love/etc, guys don't have anything inserted into them, we do the inserting. That's why its so much more taboo for a girl to fuck a guy in the ass than a guy to fuck a girl in the ass. Which do you think happens more? I'd put my money on the second one, because like you said, a double standard exists. I not being chauvinist here, in fact, I know some guys that probibly could use a good ass-fucking.

So.... yes, maybe I am poking a little fun, but come on now. Have to keep the thread light, otherwise he'll start to get second thoughts. And I for one really do want to know what went on in his head when he bends over. Props though. Who knows, maybe this makes you more of a man than a guy who's scared it makes him homosexual or some bullshit. Was is your idea or your girlfriends?

Did you guys order that pink color? I read somewhere that the pink starts to fade/stain after a while, might want to go with a black or something. And yeah, I would also imagine you might want to use a bunch of lube.

Let us know how it goes man.

Bryndian_Dhai · 02-10-2005, 03:43 AM

Yep. Lube. Lots and lots of lube. And I'd invest in a tube of Anal-eaze. I don't care what you've tried before, you'll be sore afterward. Oh and LOTS of patience. Use the thin probe first and take things slow.

Considering that the male g-spot is up around his prostate, I think this is REALLY gonna be something you seriously enjoy. I think it rocks that you're able to give it a shot.

ShaniFaye · 02-10-2005, 04:19 AM

ktspktsp....cool!!!! This is something Dave and I do and he REALLY enjoys it...I myself cant see why cause I cant stand it, but I dont have the prostate gland up in there

When we do this kind of thing I start off giving by giving him a blow job(making sure I have lube near by)....licking and sucking and biting (yes he likes that) him til he gets really good and hard, making sure to pay attention to his balls too. This usually makes him relax really well so since his dick is so wet from being in my mouth I slide my hand up and down the shaft making suring to get my first finger wet (its the only finger that I can do this with) then I take hold of him at the base and while sucking on his balls I start to slide my finger in really slow.....since ya'll have done this Im sure she can tell when you've gotten used to it enuff to slide it farther in. I make sure to have his dick IN my mouth and get him used the the in and out motion while alternating, dick all the way in my mouth finger not all the way out, but not pushed in, then I start to slide his dick out and hold the head between my lips while pushing my finger in. I'll usually do that for about 10 minutes then get the lube and drizzle it on my finger (while still sucking) and work it in.

Im already wearing the strap on so with the other hand I work on getting it lubed as well. When everything is ready I let him get in which ever position he's in the mood for...sometimes its doggie, sometimes its him on his back, sometimes he does the on top turned around backwards thing...depends on our mood, and I say our because us being who we are....sometimes hes restrained and doesnt have a choice on how I take him. (At those times its doggie and Im flogging him while fucking him).

Never shove the strap on in it has to be worked in slowly, but once you're ready you'll know it....just make sure to tell her when you can take more of it in. When we do it doggie Im stroking his dick while fucking him, which he loves cause he actually has two different kinds of orgasms...if he's on his back I'll do the same but I wont let him have the "dick" orgasm, once he's had the one from fucking I finish off the bj I was giving him.

Damn, thats longer than I meant....I hope it helps some

black94lt1 · 02-10-2005, 07:38 AM

Damn ShaniFaye, you are a dream! Your man must absolutely love that!

Redlemon · 02-10-2005, 07:44 AM

Best of luck, ktspktsp (and how do you pronounce that, anyway?)! You are further ahead of me, so I can't give you any advice. But, there was a bunch of discussion in the thread Men only: What do you think about being pleasured by a woman wearing a strap-on?, you might want to give that a read.

Please report back and let us know how it went for you!

high_way · 02-10-2005, 08:11 AM

i have to say good on you for giving it a go. i could never do personally do it. for my my butt is the one place that i have never really enjoyed having a finger/rim etc. it has never been a comfort thing for me... all the same would like to hear how it goes. good luck

MoonDog · 02-10-2005, 10:25 AM

If my wife would let me in the back door, I'd let her give me the same treatment. If it's good enough for the goose, it must be good enough for the gander. I don't know if I would enjoy it all that much - after all, my yearly trip to the doctor isn't all that much fun - but I'm all about the fairness.

ShaniFaye · 02-10-2005, 10:26 AM

moondog....our yearly doctors visits arent enjoyable either but it doesnt stop me from liking it when my guy sticks something in there or pinches my nipples

Nazggul · 02-10-2005, 11:27 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ambiguity

Condecending? Not at all... In fact, I believe I said whatever turns him on. <snip>

I have to agree with Gak. My first impression from your post was quite negative. Equivalent to something like "Hey, that's cool for you man, but me? No way, I'm not gay." I got the impression that "gay" was behind your reaction based on your comment about "dropping the soap." Each time you said "Hey that's cool." you followed it with a backhanded negative comment, being her b*tch, etc.

Just an observation.

Spicy McHaggis · 02-10-2005, 12:08 PM

I've done this many times and enjoy it quite a bit.

When you're starting out be sure to do it doggy style. Have her just stand there and you should reach back and put it in. You should "break the seal" by pushing back onto it, not have her push it in. It will hurt a first, so just wait a second, and then push in a little deeper.

Once you have it all the way in start to move it in and out a little bit. Once you get used to it she can then start to thrust and you can stay still... but I've always found it hurt less and worked better if I could countrol the initial insertion.

Charlatan · 02-10-2005, 12:14 PM

As others have pointed out the key to enjoying this is the same for you as it is for a woman... take your time and use plenty of lube.

And relax... nothing worse than tensing up...

trache · 02-10-2005, 12:45 PM

Tried it and loved it. She has said that it doesn't really do anything for her (and how could it?), but she's playful enough to do it.

I might recommend having it done on your back first. If you're on a bed and she's standing, she won't have her weight on you. If you ask her to pull out, she won't have a problem. I would assume the angle would be better to, but I'm not a biologist by any means. This way both of you can get used to it and then try doggie-style for more fun (don't forget to ask her kindly for a reach-around! LOL).

If she wants to have some fun as well, tell her to use a bullet-type vibrator in the harness.

wolf · 02-10-2005, 01:34 PM

Take it slow man and lots of lube. Also make sure that you tell her what you like and what you don't. Congrats on having a girl who is open to this sort of thing.

Bryndian_Dhai · 02-10-2005, 02:43 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by trache

Tried it and loved it. She has said that it doesn't really do anything for her (and how could it?), but she's playful enough to do it.

Oooh, if she's willing to do this for you, even though its not really her cup of tea, maybe you should get her a Feeldoe.

This is the one with the removable bullet that makes it vibrate against her clit... I'm just putting the link in the interests of work-safe posting. *grins*

http://www1.stockroom.com/b822.htm

They're a little pricey, I know, but good sex toys always are. heheh.

Oh, and Moondog: Maybe if you let her do you, maybe she'd be more willing to let you do her. *grins* Why does the girl always gotta go first? *winks*

MahlerIsGod · 02-10-2005, 03:16 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by GakFace

I find it so funny how so many guys are all for fucking a woman in the ass, but then when the question is turned on them.. "oh no, exit only!" How does it make the man gay but perfectly hetero for the woman... Such a stupid rule. People need to get secure in their sexuality so such trivial things can be looked into.

I'm sorry Ambiguity, but your post sounds pretty condecending.

ktspktsp, sorry but I don't know a thing to help you out. All I can say is that a strap-on will involve a LOT more area for friction so make sure to have LOTS of lube so that it goes in smoothly. Aside from that I know nothing, lemmie know how it goes tho! And Kudos for having a girlfriend who is open to such possibilies.

Couldn't have said it better myself. Especially when it was concerning Ambiguity's post. I thought it went a little too far.

clavus · 02-10-2005, 03:20 PM

I've not been on the receiving end of a butt-fucking, so I can only offer you the persepctive of someone who has "deflowered" a few willing ladies. The easiest way to start is with you both laying on your sides in a spooning position. Start slow.

ktspktsp · 02-10-2005, 08:04 PM

Wow, thanks for the replies everybody

.

I'll try to answers most topics here:

1. Ambiguity, as of now, we’re not really into role reversal or power play, we’re just trying something new, to see if we’re gonna like it.

2. GoldenOuroboros, the harness has a small vibrator in it, so that should add to the fun for her

3. Bryndian_Dhai, I’m not really interested in using a numbing cream.. If it hurts (significantly, not just some soreness) then we’re probably doing something wrong, and the pain will be and indicator of that. Oh, and the Feeldoe does look cool..

4. Everybody, thanks for the tips! (and the long post Shani_Faye

).

5. I’ll give a report afterward for those who are interested. Hopefully it will be fun!

sammy776 · 02-10-2005, 08:35 PM

good luck with that. It is not my thing but hey what ever gets you off

abaya · 02-10-2005, 09:05 PM

Hi all,

I'm ktspktsp's SO and just wanted to say thanks for all the enthusiasm... ShaniFaye, I loved the detail in your post and it got me even more excited for the weekend.

I'm really looking forward to trying our new toy (which just arrived tonight from G Boutique, in Chicago).

I never would have imagined trying this a year ago (we've been together for 10 months), as I used to be quite a prude and a virgin to boot. My ex before this told me he wouldn't mind a strap-on, but I didn't even know what they were!... my, how things change when you're in a stable relationship with trust at its core. Lots of creative fun in bed, for one thing.

I brought up the idea with ktspktsp last summer (probably when we were joking about him wanting to try anal on me, to which I briskly replied, "Not unless I get to put a dildo up your ass, too!") and while he hadn't thought of it before, he didn't feel weird about it or anything... which was a turn-on. (All "exit only" guys take heed: it's sweet for a woman when her man is up for this, since it means he's adventurous, doesn't have a double standard, and trusts her.)

In any case, I think as long as the communication is solid and the lube is flowing, we should be fine. I will report to all from the female side of things once we have our fun!

By the way, is using a strap-on considered "kinky?" I've heard that word in connection to this kind of thing and feel a bit odd about it... not that kinky is bad (esp. considering my prudish background), but if you knew me, you'd think I was vanilla as hell.

Just wondering what makes some things "kinky" and some things not.

Cheers!

visotech · 02-11-2005, 12:45 AM

wow, awesome couple right there...I'd say I would like to have a go at this sometime in my life, if its good then great, if its bad then hey atleast I tried it. But at the rate we're going, so far only fingers in the butt, I hope this will change soon hehe

clavus · 02-11-2005, 10:43 AM

"kinky" is when you use a feather
"perverted" is when you use the whole chicken

Define kink however you want. I knew a girl that thought she was kinky because she liked to be on top sometimes. I know someone who has almost no limits sexually, yet doesn't consider herself "kinky."

pinkie · 02-11-2005, 10:45 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by abaya

By the way, is using a strap-on considered "kinky?" I've heard that word in connection to this kind of thing and feel a bit odd about it... not that kinky is bad (esp. considering my prudish background), but if you knew me, you'd think I was vanilla as hell.

Just wondering what makes some things "kinky" and some things not.

Cheers!

Ahhh, to each their own, ya know?

Cheers!

Jim Kata · 02-11-2005, 12:28 PM

ShaniFaye, your description makes me want to have my girl try it on me, just like the way you do it

Met22 · 02-11-2005, 05:16 PM

Have a great time!
You are in for one of the best orgasms ever.

ktspktsp · 02-12-2005, 12:16 PM

And now for the feedback:

So, yesterday after driving to my girlfriend's place (we live 3 hours apart, so we see each other on weekends) we unwrapped the package and tested the kit.

We started by having me lie on my stomach as she played a bit with my ass (fingers) to relax it. She then put the small dildo in the harness, and with the help of lube of course, started pushing it in/ pulling it out / keeping it in place according to my instructions. Doggie style didn't seem to work that well at that point, probably because I'm taller than her. It didn't take too much time to get used to the dildo, since it is only slightly larger than a finger, so she started going in an out, and we also switched to having me on my back. I could feel my prostate getting stimulated, which felt nice.

We then moved on to the larger one. That one took more getting used to.. Lots of lube, and keeping it still at times is necessary. The only point I felt some pain was when she had just entered me (and pushed it in), since I happened to move at that time and it got in deeper than I was ready. Anyway, after a while, she could slide in and out, and it was starting to feel good. We switched to the facing position again, and when she started stroking me at the same time, if felt GOOD. Being stroked makes the penetration much easier, somehow, and she could go faster and deeper. So, after doing that for a while I sensed I was ready to come.. The orgasm was really good, different that the usual because of the prostate stimulation..

So that's basically it (well there were more sex before and after on that day but that was old fashioned non-toy-enhanced sex

). It was interesting too to be more submissive for once, being the receiver, in a way.

Anyway, I'm sure we'll give it more tries soon, and perfect our techniques. But my advice is, give it a shot!

Lebell · 02-12-2005, 04:58 PM

Congrats to the both of you for not being afraid to explore your sexuality!

I am always pleased to hear feed back from couples and the encouragement that other members give them.

And I'm sure your brave example will help others who want to explore their own sexuality but may be too timid or scared to do so.

Only by speaking out can we get over the sexual hangups that we impose on ourselves in this society.

ktspktsp · 02-13-2005, 09:21 AM

Hi all,

Thank you, Lebell, for your kind words. This forum has definitely encouraged us as a couple in the past, so we're glad to be of help to others who may be exploring their boundaries.

Well, from the female point of view, out strap-on experience was a positive one. I won't repeat ktspktsp's post, but will add a few logistical points: first, before playing with his ass, I gave him a back massage and kissed him all over to help him relax. This was in addition to having some calm music playing and candles lit around the room, which added to the ambiance, and we also both had a little bit of red wine.

Trying to slide inside him from doggie position really was difficult... so if any couples have a differential in height (ours is about 8"), I suggest beginning with him on his back and his legs up in the air, which makes his anus more accessible. It also adds to the intimacy since you are facing each other at that point; it was such a turn-on to watch him relax and enjoy the penetration. Once I put some lube on my free hand and started rubbing his dick along with the anal penetration, that sent him over the edge pretty quickly, which was great to watch.

The "Bend Over Beginner" harness wasn't too reliable for the smaller dildo, I have to say. The base wasn't big enough, or maybe it was just too flexible... but basically I kept having to push the dildo and base back under the ring at times, which was slightly annoying. That was another reason we switched to the bigger dildo sooner.

For myself, I found that the insertable vibrator was more of a nuisance than something exciting. This was because it was small and hard, and was right between the dildo base and my pubic bone. So basically I kept grinding this hard plastic thing into my bones, which didn't feel good, even though he and I both liked the vibrating sensation. Eventually I took it out.

And there were no feelings of dominance or power involved, to be honest. Mostly I was concerned about him feeling comfortable and enjoying the experience, so I focused on that task and enjoyed watching him. I think it's the same for him when he's penetrating me in any position; it's less about dominance and more about mutual pleasure, basically. I just happened to have the penetrating instrument this time instead of vice versa. In some way it was hard for me to not be the "receiver," since it took me a while to get used to that role in the first place when we first started having sex. I tend to be the more aggressive personality and didn't like being in the "passenger seat" at first, but now I'm accustomed to it and had to adjust to being the one in the driver's seat this time.

Overall it was a good experience and I think we are both quite glad to add it to our sexual repertoire. And it made for a memorable Valentine's weekend, for sure!

Let us know if anyone else out there gives it a try...

ktspktsp · 02-13-2005, 09:23 AM

Shoot! That last post was supposed to be under abaya's name, but I forgot to log out of ktspktsp's first... sorry!! It really was me writing it, though.

KinkyKiwi · 02-14-2005, 11:26 AM

wow..i always thought it was a little weird but shanifaye you make it sound so hot! now i may start bugging my SO to try it...

abaya · 02-14-2005, 11:43 AM

Okay, I've got the right name now...

Let me also just add that we tried it again yesterday, this time with him lying flat on his stomach and me behind him... and he really enjoyed that position, too.

I have to admit that wearing a strap-on and penetrating a guy feels less like sex and more like just using a cool sex toy (a novelty). I guess it lacks the intimacy I'm used to when he's the one inside me. But I still like giving him pleasure and trying something new. I just made sure we had some good ol' vanilla sex afterwards to sate my appetite!

Charlatan · 02-14-2005, 11:46 AM

abaya... if your guy really likes this, you should consider picking up an aneros.

After giving him a good rogering, slip it into his ass, flip him on his back and ride him cowgirl. This way you get your pleasure while the aneros maintains a pressure on his prostate...

Speaking as a guy... it's mind blowing...

paulskinback · 02-15-2005, 05:07 AM

All i'm saying is for $70 or $75 I think i'll stick to what i know...!

abaya · 02-16-2005, 08:08 PM

Charlatan... I looked at the Aneros and am wondering how I would ride my guy while he has that inside him? Isn't there a possibility of hurting him with so much stuff going on at once? Does he lie flat on his back while this goes on, or..? Give me some more tips if you can.

Also, I just noticed that quite a few people have looked at this thread (over 1,000) but very few respond. I'm wondering how many guys (and gals) are actually curious about strap-ons but don't want to say anything about it. How does one get a poll going? Do you have to be a moderator to do that?

If you are a man who has had experience with a strap-on, please post about your experience! We'd like to hear about it, good or bad.

Redlemon · 02-17-2005, 07:09 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by abaya

I'm wondering how many guys (and gals) are actually curious about strap-ons but don't want to say anything about it. How does one get a poll going? Do you have to be a moderator to do that?

There's already a poll, Men only: What do you think about being pleasured by a woman wearing a strap-on?, which I mentioned on the front page.

Also, in reading the Fleshbot blog, I came across the webpage Take It Like A Man: The ultimate guide to strap-on sex, which should have good info in it as well.

wolf · 02-17-2005, 07:18 AM

Thanks for the feedback ktspktsp.

02-09-2005, 10:23 PM	#1 (permalink)
ktspktsp Addict Location: Reykjavik, Iceland	Strap-on deflowering Hello people, My girlfriend and I ordered a strap-on kit recently, and when I see her in a couple of days she will use it on me. Now, we've tried rimming, a finger in the ass, and a butt plug (actually a sort of bead-shaped plug thingy), and that felt good, but I haven't tried anything larger. So, any suggestions (ex, positions, preparation), comments, stories would be welcome! Thanks

02-09-2005, 11:29 PM	#3 (permalink)
GoldenOuroboros The Cheshire Grin... Location: An Aussie Outback	Sounds like you in for alot of fun.. Take it slow and use lots of lube (no personal experience just from what I've heard about anal sex in general). And if you end up liking it perhaps get her a strap on that has a vib built in or something. checks link Probably go the thin one first.. well.. that'd be my choice and as Ambiguity said.. let us know how it goes __________________ Can you see me grin grin grrriiiiinnnning?!

02-09-2005, 11:29 PM	#4 (permalink)
GakFace Go Ninja, Go Ninja Go!! Location: IN, USA	I find it so funny how so many guys are all for fucking a woman in the ass, but then when the question is turned on them.. "oh no, exit only!" How does it make the man gay but perfectly hetero for the woman... Such a stupid rule. People need to get secure in their sexuality so such trivial things can be looked into. I'm sorry Ambiguity, but your post sounds pretty condecending. ktspktsp, sorry but I don't know a thing to help you out. All I can say is that a strap-on will involve a LOT more area for friction so make sure to have LOTS of lube so that it goes in smoothly. Aside from that I know nothing, lemmie know how it goes tho! And Kudos for having a girlfriend who is open to such possibilies. __________________ RoboBlaster: Welcome to the club! Not that I'm in the club. And there really isn'a a club in the first place. But if there was a club and if I was in it, I would definitely welcome you to it.

02-09-2005, 11:53 PM	#6 (permalink)
Ambiguity Tilted	Condecending? Not at all... In fact, I believe I said whatever turns him on. I've never been a fan of that argument though, the whole "guys wanna fuck a woman in the ass, but when the question is turned on them "oh no, exit only!" thing, mainly because women dont have dicks. If women had dicks and vagina's, and guys had vagina's and dicks, then we would be on equal footing. But to have sex/make love/etc, guys don't have anything inserted into them, we do the inserting. That's why its so much more taboo for a girl to fuck a guy in the ass than a guy to fuck a girl in the ass. Which do you think happens more? I'd put my money on the second one, because like you said, a double standard exists. I not being chauvinist here, in fact, I know some guys that probibly could use a good ass-fucking. So.... yes, maybe I am poking a little fun, but come on now. Have to keep the thread light, otherwise he'll start to get second thoughts. And I for one really do want to know what went on in his head when he bends over. Props though. Who knows, maybe this makes you more of a man than a guy who's scared it makes him homosexual or some bullshit. Was is your idea or your girlfriends? Did you guys order that pink color? I read somewhere that the pink starts to fade/stain after a while, might want to go with a black or something. And yeah, I would also imagine you might want to use a bunch of lube. Let us know how it goes man. Last edited by Ambiguity; 02-09-2005 at 11:56 PM..

02-10-2005, 03:43 AM	#7 (permalink)
Bryndian_Dhai Insane Location: Louisiana	Yep. Lube. Lots and lots of lube. And I'd invest in a tube of Anal-eaze. I don't care what you've tried before, you'll be sore afterward. Oh and LOTS of patience. Use the thin probe first and take things slow. Considering that the male g-spot is up around his prostate, I think this is REALLY gonna be something you seriously enjoy. I think it rocks that you're able to give it a shot. __________________ “When facism comes to America it will be wrapped in the flag and carrying a cross.” ~Sinclair Lewis

02-09-2005, 11:05 PM	#2 (permalink)
Ambiguity Tilted	Bend over and take it like a man. Eh, woman. Whatever. There's a reason they say dont drop the soap. But whatever turns you on man. If you guys have already played around with other things, then I wouldnt imagine this would be any different, except both her hand are free... If your into the role playing thing, wear some of her underwear, maybe a bra...? Have her call you her btch while she's givin' it to ya doggy style maybe? The strangest things turn us guys on, I'll attest to that, although for me it's not being screwed by my girlfriend in the ass. Maybe being licked on the ass.... But thats a far cry from being her btch. Huh. Let us know how it goes? She going to have anything pleasuring her while she's behind you pounding away? Take it easy on the knees though, I found that out the hard way the other night. The longer you kneel, even on a soft bed, damn... I could barely make it down the stairs to get my girlfriend a glass of water after all her yelling and screaming.... Which some would say makes me her b*tch.... but in a totally different way than taking it in the ass from her... Yeah..... Let us know how it goes though, yeah?

02-09-2005, 11:38 PM	#5 (permalink)
ironmaiden7o7 Insane Location: NYC	I like how comfortable you are with this. It's good to be open minded when in a relationship. I know many might say that it's great to have a girlfriend who is open to such possibilities, but I think you are the one that needs the bows here. YOU are the one who is letting her do this to YOU. Much respect. Take it easy at first and I am sure after a while, you'll be fine. As long as you like it, it will be great, and let me know how it goes also! Good luck!

02-10-2005, 04:19 AM	#8 (permalink)
ShaniFaye Submit to me, you know you want to Location: Lilburn, Ga	ktspktsp....cool!!!! This is something Dave and I do and he REALLY enjoys it...I myself cant see why cause I cant stand it, but I dont have the prostate gland up in there When we do this kind of thing I start off giving by giving him a blow job(making sure I have lube near by)....licking and sucking and biting (yes he likes that) him til he gets really good and hard, making sure to pay attention to his balls too. This usually makes him relax really well so since his dick is so wet from being in my mouth I slide my hand up and down the shaft making suring to get my first finger wet (its the only finger that I can do this with) then I take hold of him at the base and while sucking on his balls I start to slide my finger in really slow.....since ya'll have done this Im sure she can tell when you've gotten used to it enuff to slide it farther in. I make sure to have his dick IN my mouth and get him used the the in and out motion while alternating, dick all the way in my mouth finger not all the way out, but not pushed in, then I start to slide his dick out and hold the head between my lips while pushing my finger in. I'll usually do that for about 10 minutes then get the lube and drizzle it on my finger (while still sucking) and work it in. Im already wearing the strap on so with the other hand I work on getting it lubed as well. When everything is ready I let him get in which ever position he's in the mood for...sometimes its doggie, sometimes its him on his back, sometimes he does the on top turned around backwards thing...depends on our mood, and I say our because us being who we are....sometimes hes restrained and doesnt have a choice on how I take him. (At those times its doggie and Im flogging him while fucking him). Never shove the strap on in it has to be worked in slowly, but once you're ready you'll know it....just make sure to tell her when you can take more of it in. When we do it doggie Im stroking his dick while fucking him, which he loves cause he actually has two different kinds of orgasms...if he's on his back I'll do the same but I wont let him have the "dick" orgasm, once he's had the one from fucking I finish off the bj I was giving him. Damn, thats longer than I meant....I hope it helps some __________________ *I want the diabetic plan that comes with rollover carbs. I dont like the unused one expiring at midnite!!* Last edited by ShaniFaye; 02-10-2005 at 04:32 AM..

02-10-2005, 07:38 AM	#9 (permalink)
black94lt1 Tilted	Damn ShaniFaye, you are a dream! Your man must absolutely love that!

02-10-2005, 07:44 AM	#10 (permalink)
Redlemon Devoted Donor Location: New England	Best of luck, ktspktsp (and how do you pronounce that, anyway?)! You are further ahead of me, so I can't give you any advice. But, there was a bunch of discussion in the thread Men only: What do you think about being pleasured by a woman wearing a strap-on?, you might want to give that a read. Please report back and let us know how it went for you! __________________ I can't read your signature. Sorry.

02-10-2005, 08:11 AM	#11 (permalink)
high_way Addict Location: Australia	i have to say good on you for giving it a go. i could never do personally do it. for my my butt is the one place that i have never really enjoyed having a finger/rim etc. it has never been a comfort thing for me... all the same would like to hear how it goes. good luck __________________ A stranger is just a friend you havent met yet. Impostor of the imposturous

02-10-2005, 10:25 AM	#12 (permalink)
MoonDog Psycho Location: Buffalo, New York	If my wife would let me in the back door, I'd let her give me the same treatment. If it's good enough for the goose, it must be good enough for the gander. I don't know if I would enjoy it all that much - after all, my yearly trip to the doctor isn't all that much fun - but I'm all about the fairness.

02-10-2005, 10:26 AM	#13 (permalink)
ShaniFaye Submit to me, you know you want to Location: Lilburn, Ga	moondog....our yearly doctors visits arent enjoyable either but it doesnt stop me from liking it when my guy sticks something in there or pinches my nipples __________________ *I want the diabetic plan that comes with rollover carbs. I dont like the unused one expiring at midnite!!*

02-10-2005, 12:08 PM	#15 (permalink)
Spicy McHaggis Tilted Location: Athens, OH	I've done this many times and enjoy it quite a bit. When you're starting out be sure to do it doggy style. Have her just stand there and you should reach back and put it in. You should "break the seal" by pushing back onto it, not have her push it in. It will hurt a first, so just wait a second, and then push in a little deeper. Once you have it all the way in start to move it in and out a little bit. Once you get used to it she can then start to thrust and you can stay still... but I've always found it hurt less and worked better if I could countrol the initial insertion.

02-10-2005, 12:14 PM	#16 (permalink)
Charlatan Getting it. Super Moderator Location: Lion City	As others have pointed out the key to enjoying this is the same for you as it is for a woman... take your time and use plenty of lube. And relax... nothing worse than tensing up... __________________ "My hands are on fire. Hands are on fire. Ain't got no more time for all you charlatans and liars." - Old Man Luedecke

02-10-2005, 12:45 PM	#17 (permalink)
trache Insane	Tried it and loved it. She has said that it doesn't really do anything for her (and how could it?), but she's playful enough to do it. I might recommend having it done on your back first. If you're on a bed and she's standing, she won't have her weight on you. If you ask her to pull out, she won't have a problem. I would assume the angle would be better to, but I'm not a biologist by any means. This way both of you can get used to it and then try doggie-style for more fun (don't forget to ask her kindly for a reach-around! LOL). If she wants to have some fun as well, tell her to use a bullet-type vibrator in the harness. __________________ "You looked at me as if I was eating runny eggs in slow motion." - Gord Downie of The Tragically Hip

02-10-2005, 01:34 PM	#18 (permalink)
wolf Ravenous Location: Right Behind You	Take it slow man and lots of lube. Also make sure that you tell her what you like and what you don't. Congrats on having a girl who is open to this sort of thing. __________________ Thousands of years ago, cats were worshipped as Gods. Cats have never forgotten this.

02-10-2005, 03:20 PM	#21 (permalink)
clavus pow! Location: NorCal	I've not been on the receiving end of a butt-fucking, so I can only offer you the persepctive of someone who has "deflowered" a few willing ladies. The easiest way to start is with you both laying on your sides in a spooning position. Start slow. __________________ Ass, gas or grass. Nobody rides for free.

02-10-2005, 08:04 PM	#22 (permalink)
ktspktsp Addict Location: Reykjavik, Iceland	Wow, thanks for the replies everybody . I'll try to answers most topics here: 1. Ambiguity, as of now, we’re not really into role reversal or power play, we’re just trying something new, to see if we’re gonna like it. 2. GoldenOuroboros, the harness has a small vibrator in it, so that should add to the fun for her 3. Bryndian_Dhai, I’m not really interested in using a numbing cream.. If it hurts (significantly, not just some soreness) then we’re probably doing something wrong, and the pain will be and indicator of that. Oh, and the Feeldoe does look cool.. 4. Everybody, thanks for the tips! (and the long post Shani_Faye ). 5. I’ll give a report afterward for those who are interested. Hopefully it will be fun!

02-10-2005, 08:35 PM	#23 (permalink)
sammy776 Upright	good luck with that. It is not my thing but hey what ever gets you off

02-10-2005, 09:05 PM	#24 (permalink)
abaya Location: Iceland	Hi all, I'm ktspktsp's SO and just wanted to say thanks for all the enthusiasm... ShaniFaye, I loved the detail in your post and it got me even more excited for the weekend. I'm really looking forward to trying our new toy (which just arrived tonight from G Boutique, in Chicago). I never would have imagined trying this a year ago (we've been together for 10 months), as I used to be quite a prude and a virgin to boot. My ex before this told me he wouldn't mind a strap-on, but I didn't even know what they were!... my, how things change when you're in a stable relationship with trust at its core. Lots of creative fun in bed, for one thing. I brought up the idea with ktspktsp last summer (probably when we were joking about him wanting to try anal on me, to which I briskly replied, "Not unless I get to put a dildo up your ass, too!") and while he hadn't thought of it before, he didn't feel weird about it or anything... which was a turn-on. (All "exit only" guys take heed: it's sweet for a woman when her man is up for this, since it means he's adventurous, doesn't have a double standard, and trusts her.) In any case, I think as long as the communication is solid and the lube is flowing, we should be fine. I will report to all from the female side of things once we have our fun! By the way, is using a strap-on considered "kinky?" I've heard that word in connection to this kind of thing and feel a bit odd about it... not that kinky is bad (esp. considering my prudish background), but if you knew me, you'd think I was vanilla as hell. Just wondering what makes some things "kinky" and some things not. Cheers!

02-11-2005, 12:45 AM	#25 (permalink)
visotech Insane Location: San Diego, CA	wow, awesome couple right there...I'd say I would like to have a go at this sometime in my life, if its good then great, if its bad then hey atleast I tried it. But at the rate we're going, so far only fingers in the butt, I hope this will change soon hehe

02-11-2005, 10:43 AM	#26 (permalink)
clavus pow! Location: NorCal	"kinky" is when you use a feather "perverted" is when you use the whole chicken Define kink however you want. I knew a girl that thought she was kinky because she liked to be on top sometimes. I know someone who has almost no limits sexually, yet doesn't consider herself "kinky." __________________ Ass, gas or grass. Nobody rides for free.

02-11-2005, 12:28 PM	#28 (permalink)
Jim Kata Swollen Member Location: Northern VA	ShaniFaye, your description makes me want to have my girl try it on me, just like the way you do it

02-11-2005, 05:16 PM	#29 (permalink)
Met22 Junkie Location: X-posed	Have a great time! You are in for one of the best orgasms ever. __________________ Living on the west end dreaming of the theater playing in the Metropolis - Dream the Dream Live the Dream

02-12-2005, 12:16 PM	#30 (permalink)
ktspktsp Addict Location: Reykjavik, Iceland	And now for the feedback: So, yesterday after driving to my girlfriend's place (we live 3 hours apart, so we see each other on weekends) we unwrapped the package and tested the kit. We started by having me lie on my stomach as she played a bit with my ass (fingers) to relax it. She then put the small dildo in the harness, and with the help of lube of course, started pushing it in/ pulling it out / keeping it in place according to my instructions. Doggie style didn't seem to work that well at that point, probably because I'm taller than her. It didn't take too much time to get used to the dildo, since it is only slightly larger than a finger, so she started going in an out, and we also switched to having me on my back. I could feel my prostate getting stimulated, which felt nice. We then moved on to the larger one. That one took more getting used to.. Lots of lube, and keeping it still at times is necessary. The only point I felt some pain was when she had just entered me (and pushed it in), since I happened to move at that time and it got in deeper than I was ready. Anyway, after a while, she could slide in and out, and it was starting to feel good. We switched to the facing position again, and when she started stroking me at the same time, if felt GOOD. Being stroked makes the penetration much easier, somehow, and she could go faster and deeper. So, after doing that for a while I sensed I was ready to come.. The orgasm was really good, different that the usual because of the prostate stimulation.. So that's basically it (well there were more sex before and after on that day but that was old fashioned non-toy-enhanced sex ). It was interesting too to be more submissive for once, being the receiver, in a way. Anyway, I'm sure we'll give it more tries soon, and perfect our techniques. But my advice is, give it a shot! Last edited by ktspktsp; 02-12-2005 at 12:18 PM.. Reason: Edited for spelling

02-12-2005, 04:58 PM	#31 (permalink)
Lebell Cracking the Whip Location: Sexymama's arms...	Congrats to the both of you for not being afraid to explore your sexuality! I am always pleased to hear feed back from couples and the encouragement that other members give them. And I'm sure your brave example will help others who want to explore their own sexuality but may be too timid or scared to do so. Only by speaking out can we get over the sexual hangups that we impose on ourselves in this society. __________________ "Of all tyrannies, a tyranny exercised for the good of its victims may be the most oppressive. It may be better to live under robber barons than under omnipotent moral busybodies. The robber baron's cruelty may sometimes sleep, his cupidity may at some point be satiated; but those who torment us for our own good will torment us without end, for they do so with the approval of their own conscience." – C. S. Lewis The ONLY sponsors we have are YOU! Please Donate!

02-13-2005, 09:21 AM	#32 (permalink)
ktspktsp Addict Location: Reykjavik, Iceland	Hi all, Thank you, Lebell, for your kind words. This forum has definitely encouraged us as a couple in the past, so we're glad to be of help to others who may be exploring their boundaries. Well, from the female point of view, out strap-on experience was a positive one. I won't repeat ktspktsp's post, but will add a few logistical points: first, before playing with his ass, I gave him a back massage and kissed him all over to help him relax. This was in addition to having some calm music playing and candles lit around the room, which added to the ambiance, and we also both had a little bit of red wine. Trying to slide inside him from doggie position really was difficult... so if any couples have a differential in height (ours is about 8"), I suggest beginning with him on his back and his legs up in the air, which makes his anus more accessible. It also adds to the intimacy since you are facing each other at that point; it was such a turn-on to watch him relax and enjoy the penetration. Once I put some lube on my free hand and started rubbing his dick along with the anal penetration, that sent him over the edge pretty quickly, which was great to watch. The "Bend Over Beginner" harness wasn't too reliable for the smaller dildo, I have to say. The base wasn't big enough, or maybe it was just too flexible... but basically I kept having to push the dildo and base back under the ring at times, which was slightly annoying. That was another reason we switched to the bigger dildo sooner. For myself, I found that the insertable vibrator was more of a nuisance than something exciting. This was because it was small and hard, and was right between the dildo base and my pubic bone. So basically I kept grinding this hard plastic thing into my bones, which didn't feel good, even though he and I both liked the vibrating sensation. Eventually I took it out. And there were no feelings of dominance or power involved, to be honest. Mostly I was concerned about him feeling comfortable and enjoying the experience, so I focused on that task and enjoyed watching him. I think it's the same for him when he's penetrating me in any position; it's less about dominance and more about mutual pleasure, basically. I just happened to have the penetrating instrument this time instead of vice versa. In some way it was hard for me to not be the "receiver," since it took me a while to get used to that role in the first place when we first started having sex. I tend to be the more aggressive personality and didn't like being in the "passenger seat" at first, but now I'm accustomed to it and had to adjust to being the one in the driver's seat this time. Overall it was a good experience and I think we are both quite glad to add it to our sexual repertoire. And it made for a memorable Valentine's weekend, for sure! Let us know if anyone else out there gives it a try...

02-13-2005, 09:23 AM	#33 (permalink)
ktspktsp Addict Location: Reykjavik, Iceland	Shoot! That last post was supposed to be under abaya's name, but I forgot to log out of ktspktsp's first... sorry!! It really was me writing it, though.

02-14-2005, 11:26 AM	#34 (permalink)
KinkyKiwi "Without the fuzz" Location: ..too close for comfort..	wow..i always thought it was a little weird but shanifaye you make it sound so hot! now i may start bugging my SO to try it... __________________ Some mornings, it's just not worth chewing through the leather straps. Play with each other. Play with yourselves. Just don't play with the squirrels, they bite.

02-14-2005, 11:43 AM	#35 (permalink)
abaya Location: Iceland	Okay, I've got the right name now... Let me also just add that we tried it again yesterday, this time with him lying flat on his stomach and me behind him... and he really enjoyed that position, too. I have to admit that wearing a strap-on and penetrating a guy feels less like sex and more like just using a cool sex toy (a novelty). I guess it lacks the intimacy I'm used to when he's the one inside me. But I still like giving him pleasure and trying something new. I just made sure we had some good ol' vanilla sex afterwards to sate my appetite!

02-14-2005, 11:46 AM	#36 (permalink)
Charlatan Getting it. Super Moderator Location: Lion City	abaya... if your guy really likes this, you should consider picking up an aneros. After giving him a good rogering, slip it into his ass, flip him on his back and ride him cowgirl. This way you get your pleasure while the aneros maintains a pressure on his prostate... Speaking as a guy... it's mind blowing... __________________ "My hands are on fire. Hands are on fire. Ain't got no more time for all you charlatans and liars." - Old Man Luedecke

02-15-2005, 05:07 AM	#37 (permalink)
paulskinback Insane	All i'm saying is for $70 or $75 I think i'll stick to what i know...! __________________ 'Everything that can be invented has been invented.- - 1899, Charles Duell, U.S. Office of Patents. 'There is no reason anyone would want a computer in their home.' - Ken Olson, 1977, Digital Equipment Corporation

02-16-2005, 08:08 PM	#38 (permalink)
abaya Location: Iceland	Charlatan... I looked at the Aneros and am wondering how I would ride my guy while he has that inside him? Isn't there a possibility of hurting him with so much stuff going on at once? Does he lie flat on his back while this goes on, or..? Give me some more tips if you can. Also, I just noticed that quite a few people have looked at this thread (over 1,000) but very few respond. I'm wondering how many guys (and gals) are actually curious about strap-ons but don't want to say anything about it. How does one get a poll going? Do you have to be a moderator to do that? If you are a man who has had experience with a strap-on, please post about your experience! We'd like to hear about it, good or bad.

02-17-2005, 07:18 AM	#40 (permalink)
wolf Ravenous Location: Right Behind You	Thanks for the feedback ktspktsp. __________________ Thousands of years ago, cats were worshipped as Gods. Cats have never forgotten this.