A bit of a "touchy" situation

[thespian86]

Hey there,

I just started getting "physical" with my girlfriend. While enjoying a passionate kiss lastnight she told me that she has always enjoyed a good round of fingering. I told her I was up to it and I'd be glad to give it a go!

But, sadly, I have an extreme lack of experience when it comes to my fingers; I've always been an oral man myself. So the situation, at the moment, is that I would like nothing more then to see her cum hard, but I need alittle bit help. I tried searching the forums and found nothing that was helpful.

Shes very sensitive and likes it soft. I'm into foreplay so she is always warmed up and wet. Is there anybody, male or female, who can give me a good step by step process?

Thanks in advance, PMF 21

[Nancy]

Do you mean fingering as in finger-fucking her vagina or rubbing her clit?

[Redlemon]

Well, if she is already comfortable enough to tell you what she likes, she is also probably comfortable enough to guide you through it. She could (a) finger herself while you watch and learn, (b) hold and guide your hand while you touch her, and/or (c) tell you what she wants while you do it.

(b) is a very fun option, I learned a lot that way, and I'd already been dating her for six years!

[drakers]

Insert and begin....maybe the women would be better to explain.

[thespian86]

Insert and begin....maybe the women would be better to explain.

Indeed...

[yosho]

lol, no don't insert and begin

first of all, most women get their stimulation from their clit, if you don't know where that is, look online for some pictures lol im sure there are plenty of those. Anyways, my girlfriend likes a clockwise rotation around her clit using 2 or 3 fingers with the middle finger pressed against the clit or clit hood. Just take it slow in the beginning and maybe get a little faster as you progress, but don't go too fast, you want a medium pace that's consistant rather than speeding up, girls like having a constant stream of sensation rather then one burst of energy which men prefere. Anyways umm...while rubbing her clit you could also insert 2 or 3 fingers in her pussy. I find it works best if you curl them upwords so you're rubbing her clit on the outside and rubbing like the inside of her clit fromt he inside, lol it's definitely an interesting thing for you and her ^______^

Anyways, just experiment and ask her what she likes, take it slow and you should be fine.

[snowy]

The suggestion that you ask her to show you is a good one.

Stimulating the clit gently but firmly in a quick motion is a good start. You probably want to use two well-lubricated fingers for this.

Then, if you can manage it, stick a finger or two in her vagina to stimulate her g-spot while still stimulating her clit.

That should do her. But don't lose hope if it takes a while!

[hobo]

Originally Posted by onesnowyowl

The suggestion that you ask her to show you is a good one.

Stimulating the clit gently but firmly in a quick motion is a good start. You probably want to use two well-lubricated fingers for this.

Then, if you can manage it, stick a finger or two in her vagina to stimulate her g-spot while still stimulating her clit.

That should do her. But don't lose hope if it takes a while!

If things go right, you won't need to apply lube, she'll be plenty wet enough. I find it best to be with her a while, makeout, and get her wet. Then when rubbing her clit, first pass your fingers by her lips and they'll get all lubed up, and pull them back to the clit and focus there. It takes some time to be able to penetrate her comfortably, so work on the clit first.

[bad jane]

you're better off asking her to guide you through what she likes. she knows she enjoys being fingered, so she prolly knows just how she likes it too.

personally, i like a very light touch (middle or ring finger usually)with a single finger going slowly in small circles directly on my clit. as i get more into it, i want a firmer touch and increasing speed. i also like my partner to continue for a bit after my climax rather than suddenly stopping. after that, i'm generally desperate for penetration of some sort.

i've never had a partner get it right the first few times without some coaching from me despite how much experience he may have had with other women. if you really want to do it right for her, you're going to need some help from her!

[FlatLand Flyer]

I have had great results with this:

While fooling around or going down on her, slowly stick in a finger. When the finger is pretty much all the way in there, start to move the finger in a 'come hither' type motion. Girls seem to love it because your are stroking the g-spot.

Results best achieved while licking her clit.

[DelayedReaction]

I agree with the idea of having her perform on herself while you watch, learn, and take notes.

I enjoy fingering a girl while going down on her. The combination of clitoral stimulation from my tongue and vaginal stimulation from my fingers works really well. Start off slow, stimulating her with your tongue and gently teasing her. When she's good and ready (read: wet), stick one finger in her. Get a feel for the situation (bad pun), and decide how aggresively to push into her. You can either go slowly, or push it in to get a nice gasp out of them. It'll depend on what she likes though. From there move your fingers, notice what works and what doesn't, and do what works.

One of the things that's worked really well for me is to have two fingers inside her, with my palm facing away from her ass. Move your fingers as if they were walking (think Yellow pages or Thing from the Addam's Family), very rapidly. They like that alot.

Another thing to do is twist your entire hand while your two fingers are inside her, back and forth. Works very well in my experience.

[Nancy]

^^yeah or if you want to make her cum by stimulating her clit then try licking her nipples at the same time

[projectself]

first off, please allow me to stress the fact that every woman is different. tell her you want to know how to please her the best you can, and would like some instruction on how to do so. and believe me, this isnt something to be embarrassed about - im sure she'd rather it feel as good as if she were doing it, than if you were poking around blind.<p>
some women like their clit rubbed hard. some don't. some women, like myself, like the general area (not JUST the clit, or one little spot) to be stimulated with the padded part of a palm, pushing in hard, almost like a grinding motion, while the fingers are playing inside.. it really depends on the woman. <p>
if she doesn't feel wet enough inside, make sure that you stimulate her by touching around her vaginal area, and kissing her neck - stimulate before entering (always a good rule to follow).

[thespian86]

Last night I did this "soft touch" thing with her. I ran one or two fingers around her stomach, ribs, neck and thighs... sometimes very slow, sometimes moving quickly between the most sensitive parts. It drove her crazy and I enjoyed watching her. It was great and I slowly moved lower and entered her. She likes it soft and slow and it took about twenty minutes of me doing the "come hither" movement and slowly moving in and out before she came (plus the hour I spent running my fingers up and down her body).

It was intense. The only other serious, and sexually active, relationship I've ever been in was alot of oral sex, nothing emotionally intense or anything that would be memorable but last night was something to remember. It was almost a solid hour and half but she said it was the best (and shes brutally honest) and I enjoyed watching her reactions, listening to her breathing, etc. Thanks a lot, but keep the advice coming!

PMF 21

[cj2112]

Originally Posted by punkmusicfan21

I enjoyed watching her reactions, listening to her breathing, etc. Thanks a lot, but keep the advice coming!

PMF 21

this behavior will teach you volumes about what she likes and what works for her.

[skier]

I've found that for most girls when they are still warming up, too much contact on the underside of their lips is just too much stimulation. Until they get really ramped up, just bring her to minor peaks by lightly running a finger(wet) or tongue over them then back out, say back to the inner thigh for a sec. If it's wet enough blow lightly on that trail back to her pussy. Gradually escalate, based on her body cues.

As for the clit, girls vary WIDELY on how sensitive it is, and that sensitivity also varies on how excited they are. There's no harm in asking about it, if they don't already indicate to you their preference.

The "come hither" thing works great, and there's a spot above it, where if you reach in as deep as you can (two fingers seem to get further) the tissue gets harder. (I would say about 4 inches in) If you use the same motion there you'll get a great reaction. it's almost like a second g-spot.

[Jay You Dee]

Yeah, I did this the other night and my girlfriend really freaked me out. We've been really busy lately in the whole boring "real life" thing, so there's been no type of sex happening since like... September (it sucks~). So, I started out slow, then put in one finger... she started screaming for another.. and another.. and another. When she finally came, I realized my whole damn fist was in there, and so did she. We exchanged awkward looks, and have done more things since then, but we haven't said a single word about that night - I dunno what the hell to think

[thespian86]

Originally Posted by skier

The "come hither" thing works great, and there's a spot above it, where if you reach in as deep as you can (two fingers seem to get further) the tissue gets harder. (I would say about 4 inches in) If you use the same motion there you'll get a great reaction. it's almost like a second g-spot.

Yeah, she was saying that the best feeling was right around the lips and the very back at the hard spot you speak of. Thanks