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Old 10-17-2004, 05:01 PM   #1 (permalink)
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Location: South Florida
Delicate Oral Advice

Hello there all you sex gurus, I'm in a little bit of a delicate situation concerning oral sex with my girl. I know there are other threads on the subject, but ths is slightly different. So my girl has no problem giving head to me, but she has told me that she doesn't enjoy receiving it, or at least didn't enjoy it very much when it was performed on her. It seems the last, and only other, partner of hers to try it has put her off it. Now this concerns me because I would love to return the favor to her, and because I know how much pleasure a woman can get from it, and I also must admit that I have a bit of an oral fixation and I would have a great time going down on her. Now we have talked about this, and she is open to letting me try it. The part I need help with is that I'm not sure how to approach the situation, she is the first person I've been with, so I've never done this before, I don't want to just let her down again when I try it and have her completely rule out the idea for good. I've read lots about the topic, so I'm not uninformed about it. What I'm looking for is a basic sure-fire to make it pleasurable for her, I won't go off and try riskier moves till she has come to like it and trust me down there more. Help from either point of view would be great, if any man has dealt with this before I'd like to hear about it, and if any woman could tell me how to go about in the most basic yet enjoyable way i'd love to hear it.
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Old 10-17-2004, 05:06 PM   #2 (permalink)
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When the time comes(sorry), ask her to tell you what she might want. It will surprise you to hear her answer to you.
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Old 10-17-2004, 05:35 PM   #3 (permalink)
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First, many women are kind of self-conscious about that area, hence thier reluctance to relax and enjoy someone going down on them

Second, just go slow, tease a lot, be gentle, and pay attention to her reactions as you're doing it. She'll definately let you know in subtle ways if you're doing it right!
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Old 10-17-2004, 05:58 PM   #4 (permalink)
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Whatever you do, start with the pubic bone. It's especially easy if your girl shaves (or at least trims) her pubic hair. For a lot of girls, just pulling the front of her panties down a bit and flicking your tongue across the pubic bone gets them going. (At least, a lot of the girls I know... like the one I was messing around with the other night. Of course, that could have had a lot to do with the amount of alcohol we had consumed.)

From there, just be sure to focus on the clitoris and have fun with it.
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Old 10-17-2004, 07:38 PM   #5 (permalink)
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women have too much baggage.. going my way?
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Old 10-18-2004, 09:07 AM   #6 (permalink)
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My wife had similar problems early in our relationship. I eventually wore her down with my begging and tonguemanship.
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Old 10-18-2004, 09:18 AM   #7 (permalink)
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Location: Lilburn, Ga
keep in mind no matter what advice you get all women are different

take me for example....I like receving oral like I like being kissed....I cannot stand...LET ME REPEAT...cannot stand a guy that goes down like he's licking a fast melting icecream cone. I dont want a fast tongue, I dont want a hard tongue, I dont want a pointy tongue...I want a soft flat slow tongue..what I always told guys was...the wider my legs are the more Im enjoying it...if my legs start closing in on your head you're doing something that doesnt feel good to me.

now...the next female that posts may say the exact opposite of what I did...the KEY is experimenting and her KNOWING that if she tells you she's not enjoying the particular way you're doing it at the moment that you will switch gears and find something she does like.
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Old 10-18-2004, 09:23 AM   #8 (permalink)
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I agree, my wife had the same hang-up. It took a lot of nagging. She was afraid that the area would smell. I asked her to wash really well, and that was the end of her complaints. Now she loves it and I can't do it often enough for her. Kinda opened up a can of worms - so to speak. Without the smell of course.
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Old 10-18-2004, 09:29 AM   #9 (permalink)
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Location: Cleveland, TN
The way I brought it about was kind of a "caught in the moment" kind of thing. Me and my girlfriend were making out and just kinda kissing around on each other (and biting, but that's another subject!), and then I just kinda laughed and kissed it through the panties. Her eyes got that mischievious look on them to pretty much tell me "GO GO JESUS FUCK GO" so I did, and she liked it. It just kind of comes to you when you get down there, it seems... at least that's how most of my friends have described doing it their first time. Still, even after 4 months my girlfriend doesn't let me do it much as she is a little self conscious still. She likes the whole rub the G spot with the middle finger kind of thing more, but again, another subject!

I'd say just go for it with her consent, and let her know that you're a beginner beforehand, and that if she'll just let you get a little experience, you'll get as good as she needs you to be at it. You'll know you've done the wrong thing if she clenches her legs around your neck and starts steering your head by grasping your ears with her fists! You'll know you've done the right thing if she starts easin' her legs apart a little more... and she screams in ecstasy and nearly pulls your hair out - then you sir, have achieved greatness in my book~
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Old 10-18-2004, 09:34 AM   #10 (permalink)
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I said it before I'll say it again.. don't eat pussy like a hampster licking a water bottle..
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Old 10-18-2004, 12:23 PM   #11 (permalink)
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Location: Houston tx
Once you get down there you just go with it. It's like kissing or dancing it's a feeling not a set pattern. And if you're really unsure and afraid you might embarras yourself, then go watch some porn. Some nice mild hardcore porn not crazy fetish porn.... because that's just plain scary.
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Old 10-18-2004, 01:08 PM   #12 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Gofclowns
Once you get down there you just go with it. It's like kissing or dancing it's a feeling not a set pattern. And if you're really unsure and afraid you might embarras yourself, then go watch some porn. Some nice mild hardcore porn not crazy fetish porn.... because that's just plain scary.

I dunno bout the porn idea.. alot of what they do is for camera angles and ish.. I would suggest using your tongue lightly, remember.. the clit is 10 billion times more sensitive than your p33n. Just be gentle, if she asks for it to be harder, go with it.. treat it like a beautiful fragile rose, and the return will be substancial (sp?).
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Old 10-18-2004, 08:03 PM   #13 (permalink)
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The key word here is "gentle". I know in pornos the guys are just going to town and biting and smacking and all that............but as a woman, I can tell you that does nothing for me. Be gentle, tease a lot, after a few moments of that, I would bet she will be begging for more.

Good luck!
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Old 10-18-2004, 11:13 PM   #14 (permalink)
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Location: Sydney Australia
Quote:
I know in pornos the guys are just going to town and biting and smacking and all that...........
Yeah that's a definite bumsteer from the porn industry I think.
If I started biting my wife down there, or spanking her pussy I think she'd kick me out of bed quick smart!
Even the whole 'posessed demon' style they seem to have with their tongue flicking around like a snake in the sun doesn't seem too realistic. My wife is like ShaniFaye, she likes sensual flat pressure, more like a caress than a tickle.
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Old 10-19-2004, 01:42 AM   #15 (permalink)
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Get her to relax (as much as possible) and take your time - no hurry, take it nice and gentle
Try to get her to say when she likes something you are doing, this way you can concentrate on what turns her on.
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Old 10-19-2004, 01:58 AM   #16 (permalink)
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Hey people,thanks for all the advice.
Even though i got nothing to contribute,I sure gained alot from this.

Big up to you man for starting this thread!!!
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Old 10-19-2004, 02:00 AM   #17 (permalink)
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Location: Cleveland, TN
Yeah, you have to get her to come around and let you do your magic first. Then, if she decides she might like the whole tongue flicking, clit sucking, meat curtain biting action.. she'll let you know. And if she ever confronts you about wanting you to do that, don't do like me and look at her like she's a freak - you'll either get slapped, or get your oral training halted for a good few weeks. Then sir, you will be sadfaced in real life~!
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Old 10-19-2004, 01:53 PM   #18 (permalink)
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Location: Maine
A big turn on for me is when my boyfriend really acts like (because he is) enjoying pleasuring me. I was EXTREMELY self conscious before I met him, so I can say from experience that the more I believed he enjoyed it, the more I could relax and enjoy.
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Old 10-19-2004, 02:52 PM   #19 (permalink)
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You both will enjoy it as long as you communicate about what she likes as you are doing it. Perhaps a shower first will let her relax a little.
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Old 10-20-2004, 10:02 PM   #20 (permalink)
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Yay, finaly a subject I know a LOT about. I am with you, origional poster, I have a bit of a oral fixation. I was also blessed with an amazing toung. When I turned about 14, I put 2 and 2 together and started dropping on girls like there was no tomorrow. I think you can trust my advice, cuz I am pretty sure (Correct me if I'm wrong) But I bet I'm the only guy in here who has been PAID for cunnilingus on multiple occasions. ANYWAYS, now to the advice part.

-----THE NUMBER ONE THING THAT WILL GT YOUR GIRL OFF: Enjoy what you are doing! Whatever technique you choose, just get into it! If you are confidant and happy, she WILL enjoy it more.-----

Techniques: Ok, girls are all different, but here are a few techniques I have found work miricles.
ONE: Flex your toung. Sometimes you gotta make it soft or hard or whatever. Mix it up. Some girls LOVE big soft toungs. Best way to do this is to stick your toung out all the way and bite it at the base, then relax.
TWO: Concentrate of the clitoris, but also go for the vagina, get your tounge up in there. While your inside her, roll your toung around.
THREEon't keep the same rythm the whole time. Switch it up, start out slow, speed up, slow down, po up to thier stomach and breasts from time to time.
Fourth and FINAL: DON'T STOP ONCE SHE CUMS ONCE! If she is cumming, chances are she can do it three or four more times, so KEEP GOING! She will apreciate it!
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Old 10-21-2004, 03:14 AM   #21 (permalink)
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I will argue with nosvette on his 4th part.....find out if that something your girl enjoys....If Dave is getting me off that way he HAS to stop once I start cumming...I cant stand it if he keeps going....it lessens the intensity for me because I get QUITE sensitive and it takes a whole lot away from the experience for me
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Old 10-21-2004, 11:20 AM   #22 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by guccilvr
I said it before I'll say it again.. don't eat pussy like a hampster licking a water bottle..
Amen!!

most girls are worried about smell, taste and umm..ya know how we look down there...

we wanna make sure were pretty and all...maybe try telling her how beautiful you think her pussy is and how much you enjoy it and maybe have her show you with her hands where she enjoys being touched
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