Ethnicity: Does it matter?
 

As a kid, I had this thing against dating black girls. I don't know what it was. Maybe it was just because they were different and I didn't understand that it's ok to be different. This kinda wore off when I reached 4th grade. I was in about 6th grade when my mom was married to a neo-nazi. This guy and his father were completely nuts. Anyways, that marriage changed my mom. I remember one day, I was looking through my yearbook and I pointed out a black girl (who I thought was attractive) and said, "Hey mom, my friend really likes this girl!" My mom then proceeded to say, "If you ever date a black girl, I will dis-own you as a son!"

I never let what my mom said affect what I thought of different girls. Heck, how can you control an attraction? But what she said hit me hard as to how people can change in such little time.

Here is a list of the ethnicities of my girlfriends/dates:
1) Middle School - White
2) Middle School - White
3) High School - Latina
4) High School - White
5) High School - Mix of Black and Latina (Doesn't count as a girlfriend, as she was only my prom date; but I was definitely attracted to her)
6) College - Latina
7) College - White
8) College - Latina
9) College - Asian

I know deep down in my heart that ethnicity doesn't and shouldn't matter when it comes down to love. But the reason I ask is because I want to know the opinions of other people. If it does matter to you, don't be ashamed to say so; just say why in a respectable manner (i.e. without any racist remarks). Don't think about what's wrong with any given ethnicity; think about how life's experiences have affected your sexuality and the people that attract you.

Just a funny fact for you all: My mom is now married to a black man. :lol:

For me, love and the sort has to start with some sort of physical attraction. I tend not to find people who aren't like me (white, dark colored hair, etc) to be attractive. Thus, I don't think I'd ever date or whatever a not-white person. But I don't find anything particularly wrong with the concept.

Ethnicity does not matter that much to me. I love women, period. I am attracted to some more than others but it ultimately comes down to who they are on the inside. I'm hispanic and my mom would prefer I date hispanic women because of our culture and the role a woman plays in our culture. To a certain extent, I would prefer to end up with a hispanic girl for those same reasons but it would not be a deal breaker if I met someone of a different race that had the traits I'm looking for.

I have to say that I'm attracted to white women more than any other ethnicity, but I am also attracted to women of other ethnicities. I don't give a shit what race you are, I'd date someone from any ethnicity.

Ethnicity matters to me. I am caucasian, and up to now I have only dated asians. I find them more attractive than others, and just get along better with them. I'm not saying that I wouldn't date girls of other races, but the chances are slim. However, there are races that just don't attract me at all (black, arab). That's too bad, but there's not much I can do about it..

well, I've been attracted to women of all races, not that I've been with them though. I had a Korian/Lithoanian gf, white (like me) gf's and my current gf is part native american.

now, lately, I've thought if I had a kid, ( I heard it can happen when you kiss a girl) I'd like it too look like me as much as possible so if I do break up with my curent gf, I think I'd go with a white chick.

having said that I do acccept that it's pritty hard to fight attractions and if something works well bolth ways I don't know that I'd reject it.

I'd also say that having been with my current part native gf, cultural diferences can be a pain in the ass that only adds to the work of a relationship.

my Korian /Lithoanian gf was gorgious REALLY ! but the white chicks were pritty nice too. personality wise there all diferent. personality, is the most importiant thing to a lasting relationship anyway, if you don't get along it aint gonna work.

if you just wanna get off...ehh, go home, wank, make make a sammich.

Why should it matter what I think, or anyone else for that matter? If you think it's time to love whoever you you love, it's time to stand up for whoever you love. White, black, yellow - who the f*** cares? It's not about them - it's about you.
Either you love her or you don't.

I'm Mexican (mostly, anyway) and I like everything except my own race. I tend to be picky when it comes to women of my own race. Yes, I like black women (even though most of them at my school are taller than me ^^) and Indian women (the Indian women at my school tend to be very attractive... well I think so ^^).

I feel the opposite way Boink does about having kids. I want my kids to look as little like me as possible, and hopefully taller than me too.

heh, I just said that because I had tought recently that I'm the only child of an only child dad, so If I don't have a kid, my dads line ends here ! I actually don't think I will have kids, but I do like what I look like (I'd date me :rolleyes: ) so if it turned out to be a boy I'd pe pleased that he looked like me....

regardless, true love :love: overrules all

My 12 girlfriends have been white, I've messed around with girls of other races, but I mostly end up with caucasian girls in relationships.

I grew up in the middle of Illinois, and went to school and was friends with a lot of black people....later in life my step daughter started running around with this black dude---I went ballistic...

Needless to say she married him, and gave us two of the greatest grand daughters that God ever put on this earth---and the "back dude"---he is one hell of a hard working
man, and I am proud to call him son..there is nothing I would not do for him....

How time and a little baby girl can change your views of people...some great memorys..

--and a lot of wasted resentment...

Ethnicity doesn't matter to me, I just tend to be attracted to white guys and spanish/puerto rican guys...tall fit guys too.. yum. However, attraction doesn't always lead me to dating a guy. It can be his confidence, his sense of humor, his laid back attitude. Personality scores HUGE points.

I've been in relationships with:
1. filippino/white (1yr 6mo)
2. Vietnamese (3 mo)
3. White (almost 2 yrs now)

It doesn't matter. We're all the same.

i've pretty much only dated white girls...

because i like to see pink nipples not dark ones...

I like redheads, and brazilians. Different races have different pysical attributes about them that I like, and thus I tend to be attracted to certain races of people (redheads are almost always caucasian) and not to others (don't particularly find asians or black people attractive).

I used to have the biggest thing for asian girls, thinking they were so much hotter than any other girls, although I am white myself. Once I was in university though, I saw the variety of hot girls that there were around, and could see myself dating girls of any race now.

So i'll have to say that race doesn't matter

I'm white, but I've dated men and women of lots of different ethnicities. Funnily enough, I'm least attracted to the blonde haired/blue eyed aryan ideal. In general, I don't find blondes attractive.

People of mixed race.... ANY mixed race..... are the most attractive to me. *shrugs* I kind of don't see race when I see a person I find attractive. They are either attractive or not..... not black/white/red/yellow/beige/cream..... whatever, lol.

I like big men, preferably with long hair and facial hair. The "big biker" look, lol. (And yes, I've dated even a black man who met that physical criteria, lol)

I tend to like women slightly athletic and "boyish" looking. *shrugs* But neither of those are carved in stone.

I love who I love, not what they look like.

Bryn

I've been in an "interracial" relationship for what will be 2 years in a few days and outside of the ways we poke fun at each other - race is of no signifcance as it doesn't play a meaningful role in the ways in which we deal with each other.

Physical appearance takes a back seat to a number of different factors when I'm looking for a relationship with someone but when it's a matter of looks the color of the skin doesn't make a difference...if she's got something to say that's worth listening to, an open mind, and an ass that nicely fills out a pair of pants - she's good to go.

I find certain features very very attractive in the women I date - one of those is pale skin with freckles. That kind of limits my selection list a bit :p

Personally, I find every race attractive in a certain way. But to be honest, I often overlook ethnicity when I see that I'm attracted to someone. Basically if she's a cool person, that's the hottest part of all. I couldn't stay with someone that way hot but annoyed the fuck outta me. But if we're talking about porn, I def prefer the asians. Hells yea. :)

I think I've dated just about every ethnicity out there so it doesn't make one bit of difference to me. I find I'm attracted to Latina women more than anything and least attracted to blonde-anglo women.

Truely, the personality is the deciding factor if I'll date a person or not.

Interesting fact, the nurse practioner told my gal that all pinkies turn dark after pregnancy. She said it's easy to tell which celebs have had a puppy or not.

I didn't know this.

Personally, I'm generally more physically attracted to exotic appearances. That goes for both white and non white races but one thing that often is a barrier for me in dating a minority race is culture. I live in a college town so there are a lot of minorities compared to other areas in the state but many of them are also very into maintaining their unique culture and, since I can't really relate to that, it makes many of them harder to approach and simply meet with in general. I've only gone out with white women but then again, I've only dated a total of 2 women.

Interestingly, they've both been white and blonde, physical traits I don't exactly drool over in a women. It seems opportunity, circumstance, and personality trump appearances in my book.

I dont really have a fundamental problem with dating any ethnicity. however, I dont find really dark skinned girls attractive, and I dont like girls who are "ghetto" in their mannerisms, voice or appearance. This rules out alot of black girls that I meet.
Ive dated three girls: two white girls, and one arab girl (bangladesh)-current.
In my opinion, asian/latin/arab girls are by far the most attractive.
I dont like girls who are "culture minded" because I abhor cultural and religous traditions with no practical purpose. The girl from bangladesh revokes her culture, but still has two muslim traditions ingrained into her: no pork, and no alcohol. Her dislike of pork has deteriorated as time has gone on, and im sure one day, her alcohol intolerance will (Its more of a rejectance of the religous tradition that I am looking for rather than the actual consumption of alcohol, I'd be just as happy if she drank something that she thought was alcohol)

it does not matter too me really.......i may find some more attractive then others but it really does not matter

typically i'm attracted to girls who look something like me at first, but a relationship can only go so far on looks and physical attraction. my first girlfriend was absolutely gorgeous and i was physically attracted to her. it just so happens that she became my friend before anything else and we had a pretty healthy relationship before we ever started dating. thats the key. her being attractive was merely an incentive to our relationship (until it all blew up in my face, which will come in another post, i'm sure).

so, when it all comes down to it, physical attraction is what draws people to each other and its why you'll see me walking with a girlfriend (current) who looks like me. but if there's nothing further than that, enjoy it while it lasts because its not well founded enough to keep things going.

if you're physically attracted to someone, go deeper, but on the same token, there's nothing wrong with talking to someone of another race that you have the same interests as. you just might find that healthy base relationship that we're all looking for.

So glad my dad (who is white) didn't think this when he married my mother (who is black). Though it didn't much matter since my brother and I are spitting images of my father despite our brown skin.

As for me, it doesn't matter in the least. I've been attracted to all sorts of guys. I think it would be pretty rad if my kids were even more mixed than me actually.

I have no problem, but it seems like a women of a different ethinicity need to be really hot for her to be attractive to me. It's weird.

I find all races attractive but tend to date within my own, mainly because of cultural similarities. I want a lot of communication and "relating" from a boyfriend. Not everyone requires this intense a level of commonality. I can be kind of intellectually demanding, I guess, and tend to feel alienated pretty easily, so I look for people I can relate to on a lot of levels.

I've noticed that I tend to be more attracted to people who resemble me physically overall (not sure what this says about me). I tend to seek out guys who are not overly large, since I'm not, etc. Some women can be happy with guys who are very different than them, and even seem to get a kick out of it, but not me. This does not mean that I will not or have not gone with guys of "other" races - my last boyfriend (6 1/2 years) was Japanese-American, but then again I lived in Japan as a child.

I can easily see what's attractive about guys of other races and don't have anything against them for being a little different than me, but when it comes to deep, strong feelings of attraction I almost always end up with a similar type - blond hair, blue eyes. I'm more or less a redhead but started dating blond guys because they seemed more likely to have less body hair. Regardless, I'd have to say that personality and style are more interesting than hair or skin color.

My sentiments exactly. My standards are a lot higher for girls of another race, especially black, than they are for a girl of the same race.

I'm not sure why this is, I don't think I'm prejudiced about it. It's just like someone who looks so different from me has to really stand out to grab my attention.

I understand what people on this thread are saying when they mentions a SO from the same culture, etc. brings a level of comfortableness (?) with them into the relationship - but I felt like I should jump in quickly to point out how interesting and just plain fun it can be to bring someone from a different background into your world.

I am your standard white loaf of bread like many here - but have dated several wonderful people from different ethnicities (middle eastern, asian, african american) and have always walked away a better person because of what you learn about other walks of life. I highly reccomend it - it sounds as though you may have someone in mind but are hesitant based on the race issue?

I only find white women, and well latina women attractive, not the very dark skinned variety really.

Pale does it for me :p

Man I had to post on this one cause it something that is always on my mind. I have to go my own route and say I've never dated a girl who was one race. Its always been black and mexican or japanese and white. Really just someone who is mixed. I myself am black and filipino. I always like that just becuase I think thats what makes us mixed people great we get all the things from two or more races in one person granted we do have our own problems to but sill to have the height and size of a black man with straight hair and green eyes and light skinned. But anyways I would be interested to see where a lot of you guys are from becuase I honestly think this is how people make thier choice. But we will all be one color and one race one day it is coming.

I've only dated white girls, but Asians and Latinas are pretty hot too. Of course, any race can be attractive, but those seem to be the ones that I end up most attracted to in general. I probably wouldn't object to dating a girl of any race so long as she was attractive and had a compatible personality.

My wife is latina, from Panama, I am English. I would never ever go back to English girls, I can honestly say that. No comparison!

[QUOTE=CityOfAngels]
Here is a list of the ethnicities of my girlfriends/dates:
1) Middle School - White
2) Middle School - White
3) High School - Latina
4) High School - White
5) High School - Mix of Black and Latina (Doesn't count as a girlfriend, as she was only my prom date; but I was definitely attracted to her)
6) College - Latina
7) College - White
8) College - Latina
9) College - Asian

QUOTE]

speaking from the perspective of a none white (Han chinese girl here) are Latina's considered caucasians? But then again you are talking about ethnicities, not races here. My mistake. Would latinas from USA California be different ethnically than lets say latinas from NYC, and then on to the carribbean or even Italy/ Iberain peninsula the mother source of all latins?

I know that I am ethnically different from other asians primarily because I am Canadian culturally, but classified as Oriental in a racial sense. So does ethnicity stem from a racial/cultural meld?

btw, I like white guys the most, but that's because of the wide range of eye colour!

As a Latino, I do not consider myself to be caucasian. Latin people from different places are culturally different but are still considered to be Latino. Latino is more of a blanket term used for anyone that comes from a Latin country. A person from Mexico and a person from Puerto Rico can both be considered Latino but are both very different as far as culture goes. It's like the term Asian. You are Asian in a gereral sense, but probably something else more specifically.

Ethnicity, Race and Nationality are all terms that are not clearly defined. You can have the same answer for one, two or three of those terms. It all depends on how you see your self I suppose. Sorry to stray from the thread topic. Just trying to help :D

I'm an American married to a Japanese. Some have said that their standards for foreighn women are higher than for those of white women, but I'm the other way around. I look for the "exotic" or just plain different look in women. It's been harder, in my experience, to find that in white women. Ethnicity really doesn't matter, but like it has been said before, there's gotta be some sort of physical attraction there first. And foreigners (especially asians) do it for me more than women of my own race.

I, for the most part, can find all ethnicities attractive except for one. Asians. I cannot for the life of me find any Asian women attractive, no matter how beautiful one might think, they still do not do it for me. Aside from that I think the rest are attractive. Now whether I would date them or not is a different question. I don’t tend to like women of my ethnicity but it all comes down to mentality. I find white women more attractive, but if they have no brains, forget about it. I want women I could talk to, not just have sex with. Don't get me wrong though, looks are definately important, just not as important.

I lost my virginity to a Korean woman 3 years my senior. I don't discriminate, but I do have preferences, like anyone else. I would prefer a WASP woman just because of all "ethnic" groups I happen to like their features and appearance the most of all. Have I seen black hotties? Asians? Latinas? Of course. It's just a matter of preference. I would actively pursue making a relationship with a non WASP woman but If I found an attractive wonderful person of other ethnicity I wouldn't give a shit about that.