Funny Story!
 

So, I FINALLY got to stay with nwlinkvxd's apartment, stress/parent/anxiety (pretty much, at least)-free. In San Jose. For five days. It was AWESOME.

However, on the last night we were sleeping together, the funniest things happened. Firstly, I had fallen asleep, and typically I fall pretty lightly asleep (but that night we had gone to see the 'Last Comic Standing' comics Dat Phan and Tammy Pescatelli at a comedy club!). That night I was in a DEEP sleep, and because of that, horny nwlinkvxd decided to try and finger me while I was zzzzing. He succeeded, and I didn't even wake up until he tickled my armpit and asked me if I had felt the two fingers. Of course, I hadn't and couldn't believe him!

Later, he and I were sleeping with our backs to each other, and he let out a HUGE fart. I shoved him, thinking he knew what he had done, but he had been asleep! Man, my BUTTCHEEKS reverberated!! We were laughing pretty hard though.

Even later, I was sleeping in the crook of his arm, and I woke up with his pillow smothering me. I wormed my way out from under his grasp, and took the pillow away. I thought he was joking around, but in his sleep, he had grabbed his pillow and forced it over my face because I was snoring lightly. Tooooo funny. He's a violent fellow.

Such is life while living with someone.

Over time you get used to all the stupid shit they do while they sleep.



So, last night I was giving (new) girl a massage before sleep time. Well, she fell asleep during my very intense massage. When I finished I crawled back up to her face to kiss her and she said, "But I don't wanna go to Texas." No fuckin' clue. She talks in her sleep and has been known to sleep walk. This could be an interesting relationship.

People that talk in their sleep and sleep walk are awesome :D


But if anyone were to insert anything into me while I'm sleeping.. They can expect a smack across the face when I wake up. Wake me up first.

I don't know if I've done this recently, but when I actually shared a room in college, I used to talk in my sleep, my roommates used to swear that it was better than a lie detector, because they'd ask me anything, and if I was awake, I'd either give a vague answer or a not answer it at all, in my sleep, they'd get details of everything. (once it was actually taped... )

this seriously made me laugh out loud, as funny as that is I would be mortified if I did that. I know I've done that by myself esp. after a night of drinking. You guys are lucky to be at a stage in your lives where you are comfortable enough with eachother to accept eachother's biology, it's natural, go with it.

lurkette chases bunnies in her sleep. All. Night. Long.

That's one of the reasons we ponied up for a king-size bed.

Heh...
My girlfriend says she wouldn't mind waking up to that, but I've never been able to work up the courage to do it. I've always been fearing that reaction.

In my case, it just made me horny. :thumbsup:

Heh. I'm currently single, but my ex used to hit me whenever I would move, and she would say some stuff in Chinese that I didn't understand. When we'd wake up all cuddled, I'd tell her what happened and she'd say she didn't remember a thing.

My ex used to grind me in her sleep. So I'd wake her up, she'd already be wet and I'd already be rearing to go.... but if either one of us had to be up early the next day it wouldnt work. We'd only get a total of about 2hrs of sleep a night... god I miss her lol.

I do somen crazy stuff while Im asleep, but Ive never had sex while sleeping... I think..

The problem is that when Im asleep and sleepwalking Im usually trying to get to work, or do something that really doesnt make sense. (Theres this story about "test Pants" that I may share some day)

I had one ex a really long time ago that tried to "wake me up" but she said I slept right through anything she tried to do.. Sometimes to my subconcious, sleep is more important

My hubby hates it when we're in bed and my butt is touching him and I fart. What can I say, I guess I've gotten comfortable with him. I used to worry about that before we moved in together.

I'm a sleep walker/talker but he forgets so he'll be asking me questions and getting mad because I don't make any sense!

I try to cuddle my guy during sleep but he prefers to sleep undisturbed so he will scoot away from me...this usually ends with him on the floor!

My gf tends to hog the bed and the covers; I've never really figured out how a 100lb girl can push 160lbs of guy out of the bed, but she has it down. Another incident occurred fairly early one when we were just starting to sleep together regularly; she was curled up with her head on my shoulder and we were just drifting off. Well, apparently she was on a vein or a pressure point or something and I'm pretty prone to twitching anyway so my arm twitched and I ended up smacking her in the side of the head. Twice. I felt really bad about it when she woke me up, but in retrospect it's something we laugh about.

I couldnt tell you if Untitled does anything in her sleep, since I sleep like the dead...
I however do some interesting things apparently which I will not disclose here.

Ha, but I will.
Various things Ive heard over the last little while:
Come here, Timmy. Here, Tim. (Timmy is his dog)
If that's mainland, we're screwed! (Apparently Homey_V is a pirate in his dreams?)

Homey_V built roof trusses this summer. Apparently that took its tole on him:
"Jesus, what are you doing? Pass me the wood that fell. Pass it to me! *I hand him the blanket* Thanks"
And he's also been seen attempting to hammer the bed while sleeping... thankfully he didnt actually have the hammer in his hands....

Good times :D

My boyfriend talks in his sleep to but I can't remember offhand anything he has said lately.

The most freaky thing by far though was one night when we were sleeping facing each other very close and I woke up and he was staring at me. His eyes were open and in the dark I could see that they were just staring at me with no blinking. I got really weirded out by this and shook him and he was sound asleep and didn't even know he was doing this. Still scares me to this day!

I hope that she speaks Chinese while she is awake, or else that would be creepy! :p

My ex used to give me bj's while I was asleep. It was a great feeling waking up just as I came in her mouth. Other nights I would go down on her as she slept to return the favour.