Single?
 

Are you like me? Are not happy unless you're dating someone? Do you need that constant attention from someone of the oppisite sex? Are you not a whole person unless someone tells you, you are? Do you crave flesh so much it makes you sick when you don't get it? Why must I live my life this way?

Doesn't this lifestyle suck?

Nope. I love being single.

I've been engaged twice, first one ended when I declined to take his last name (he had a lousy last name) Second one ended when I seriously suggested that we both keep our own apartments. I like being by myself. I am comfortable being with me.

It's nice being with someone. But sometimes it's too much work. I want to sit around on a sunday morning in my grungy sweats drink coffee and do the ny times crossword puzzle, I don't want to talk to anyone.

I've used this expression before, but it's fitting here, you can't share a life with someone else, until you have had a life by yourself. Go out, find some stuff that you enjoy doing for you, that you have fun with. Appreciate the time that you spend with yourself, and don't always look for someone else to fill that time.

Re: Single?
 

Glancing at your avatar after reading this quote made me giggle for a second.


Seriously, I'm not sure if I feel that way or not. But I do know for the most part I have always had a girlfriend around. Maybe deep down inside I feel the same way and don't realize it.

I do know this though, I have no problem being single. I have a pretty set routine that I enjoy.

I would be crazy if I were single. I latched onto my first and only boyfriend and married him- so what does that say? Hehe... I'd probably be a stalker if I were single.

Sounds like you need to get married, King. :)

I've not been single since HS. I've been with my wife for 14 years, married 8. I love the companionship. Not sure if I could do the single thing.

i've always felt that i needed to achieve independence and become happy with myself before i ever brought someone else into my life. being fully dependent on others, in regards to romance, seems very unhealthy to me. i've seen a number of my friends get trapped into relationships because they needed to be with someone, eventhough the person they were with was completely wrong for them.

obviously, this mentality works for some people... but in general i think relationships are a lot more stable and forfilling when the two people are independently happy. from what i've experienced, there is a lot less room for disappointment and misunderstandings.

i have these tendencies but i have this raging urge to be completely independent of a male SO so i control them and for the most part nix them. but i do like having someone there but i would like to think i can manage without one as well.

I am exactly the same way as you origianl king.... funny thing is that I've been single for months now..... and the lonelyness is kinda getting to me..... damn life sucks

I was miserable after my last breakup and had convinced myself to enjoy being single, because I didn't have to deal with all the bullshit. But now that I've found someone who is absofuckinglutely amazing, I couldn't be happier. With her, there is none of that bullshit from before, because its a 100% honest and open relationship. I wouldn't give it up for anything in the world.

So as far as being single, yea, it sucks. It just depends on how well you can cope, or cant cope with it. Unfortunately, I had some very nasty coping habits.

I'd rather be single than get involved with someone I know I'm gonna get sick of in 2 weeks.
That being said, I prefer being with the right girl over being single.
I'm a whole person all by myself, I know what makes me happy and what doesn't. I won't settle down until I find someone that makes me happier than I ever imagined.

I'd like to say "No, Im not like that" but I have to admit I am.

Human beings are social creatures. Romance perpetuates the species. These feelings have substantial evolutionary use. At least thats what I keep telling me.

I really don't mind being single. But I at least like to have an "object of my affection". Meaning, even if I'm not dating someone, it is nice to have someone I am chasing.

meh i dont like being single....
but i dont hafta have a bf.....
for me its great having someone who fills that empty spot but id rather have no one filling it than the wrong person. but w/e. i do wish i werent single, but ive got time.

Yeah, it sucks. Right now, I'm single as always, and making no effort to change that because I have no time or money to do anything with another person.

Yeah, I tend to be the same way King...

I mean, right now I've been single going on 6 months, and it's the first time I've been seriously single since I was 14 or 15 (I'm 20).

I thought I'd enjoy the single thing, but really the only "fun" I've had with it is either stuff I could do while dating someone (going to the bar to see a band, etc, etc) or the time I've spent with a certain girl that I want a relationship with (which means that once again, I'm craving that).

It just feels strange for me not to have someone taking up 80% of my time and running up my cellphone bills.

Relationships can be pure hell, but I guess it's a hell that I feel at home in. It's where I'm comfortable.

I find that I am always in need of having someone "there with me", even when i am single. I guess I just like having someone to spend my life with.

I am happy being by myself, but if there is someone else to interact and share with, it makes life that much better.

Being alone sucks.. but I don't think anyone should ever have to be dependent on a relationship in order to feel happy and fulfilled.

If you can't find contentment with your life on your own, then you're setting yourself up for great disappointment if you expect a relationship to solve that for you.

I spent two years being single and it made me want to stab all of the happy couples in the face with something sharp.. and jagged.. and hot....Strangers just don't cut it for me sexually..... and I get bored on my own. I had to fight the urge to kidnap or maul sexy people........C'mere my pretty.....
I saw the way everyone looked at each other and when you are single you dont see commitment for the stressful,tiring,thought provoking,mentally and physically draining thing that it really is.

:kiss:




Fucking wow warwagon.

heh that just seems funny to me. why get engaged at all?
I understand for some being alone is fine. And for some they just need to feel that togetherness or whatever.
For me I can be alone but its always hard the transition from one to the other. When your alone you get used to it for a time and even though you may want someone in your life. It seems more incoveinent working them in. And when you are together with someone for awhile, its seems intolerable to be alone at the start.

Life sucks period.

There is no god, no higher purpose... and worshipping the flesh is just as futile.

If it weren't for the sentiments of those my psyche tells me i care about, i'd be hitting the pills as we type.

That, to me and without causing offence, sounds like a ver, _VERY_ defensive attitude.

Keeping seperate apartments?

*sniff*

Smells like sabotage to me.

Twas realistic on my part. I know I am a very difficult person.

I'd be willing to bet more marriages wouldn't end in divorce if people just maintained seperate living spaces. I want to be with someone and spend time with them because I WANT to, not because I HAVE to because I don't have another place to go. People get on each other's nerves. It's human nature, if you don't have a seperate place to go, then you are kinda forced to stay and argue (though I enjoy a good argument, I don't like arguing out of frustration)

Defensive? I don't think so. Cynical? Absolutely.

I'm kinda surprised at the number of people who want to be coupled -- especially the number of fellas --surprises me.

Nothing to do with wanting to be coupled.... it's this frame of mind that strikes me as ultra-defensive:

Honey, i wanna be with you, i wanna be with you forever, but... I just... well... I just wanna live on my own at the same time.

--

The point of marraige/engagement/myriad of other commited relationships is to share _the totality_ of your life.

you cant do that while being one step back.

I'm half cut. I accept no responsibility for my spelling/grammar - not that it's great anyway..

Being single is great until you turn out the lights. There's an incredible freedom to being alone, but sometimes things can get too heavy for one person to carry and those are the times you look around and see all the happy couples surrounding you. Then you start to feel like you were late to class. Your friends start to couple-up together and then they only do things with other couples so you start to lose friends too. Then you get over it and start to feel too cool for relationships and their ilk. Like you're Caine from Kung Fu, or a Jedi, or some other bullshit. Then you realize that since college you no longer meet single women. Everywhere you turn you see diamond rings and wedding invitations. Then you get used to it, put your feet up and wait for the first round of divorcees. :)

I prefer to be with someone else, but before my current gf (7 months =D ) I had gotten after a while to a phase when i was really enjoying being single, and then as soon as i realized this she came into my life. Wouldn't change it for anything, but I presonally enjoy single life!

I don't know...

I've was single for about a year then I got together with my now x. We were only together for a two months or so but I feel so empty without her. I don't know if it's just her or if I really can't stand being single. The only way I made it that year awas random sex and lots of booze. But those are just distractions from the real problem. I need a personality change I think. Most girls think I'm very attractive but would never even dream of dating me. I don't know why. They get to know me then something makes them turn and run.

I just want a nice girl that isn't too much of anything... normal in the middle of the road type shit. She needs to like to go out and drink everyonce in a while. She needs to be short with fairly short hair... Rockabilly girl She needs to like Reverend Horton Heat and Johnny Cash. Oh and thinks scrawny guys with mohawks and glasses are sexy as fuck.

Is that too much to ask?

I fucking hate more then anything in this world being single. To me there is nothing worse.

Then again I would not be with the wrong person just to be with someone.

I was meant to be with just one person. I have no interest in "dating around" and narrowing down my search.

I have found the man that I hope to be with forever.

Even though we see each other a lot.....I wish it were more. We live seperately and will until we get married.

That seems like a fucking eternity to me and I am sick to death of all the nights I sleep alone.

I was not meant to be without someone to hold me.

I totally agree with what you are saying!!! :)

Well, I'm definitely less happy when single, though not to such an extent :)

Its that transition period between not-single and single, or almost-not-single and aww-crap-I'm-single-again that I hate the most.. such an emotional rollercoaster.

I'm much more cautious now, so I see my current single-ness as a time to analyize my past mistakes, re-calibrate my instruments, and find a truly compatible subject :D

There is much hope here! So many opportunities.

I hate being single, I *NEED* constant attention, infact if I'm seeing someone, they'll need to give me quite a bit of attention if I'm not to feel unloved.
This sucks :(

wow some peeps need it ? when I am in a relationship it always seems the grass is greener type shit. I want my space. but when i am single or dating and she wants to do something else I am like hey? what the hell? lets do something!

So then relationships are all about you? :D

Do you give the same back to that person?

"The grass is always greener on the other side; then you get there just do discover it is artificial turf."

Enjoy the space you are in and the rest will follow.

I love being single. I have been single for now...well its getting close to three years. I've dated around, fooled around, but have no desire to be in a relatioship. My last one was a hurtful break up for me, its not a "not willing to put my heart out there". I just don't want to be tied to someone, anyone. I have a friend who can't stay single to save her life. She wants to be, but can't. She has the same problem, she has the illusion of independency, when it really is dependency. I love her to death, but no words I say can really help.

Exactly the same way. I've only been in short relationships for a short amount of time.

However, when I went away to camp, I loved being single, only because I was hooking up with a bunch of chicks there lol. It's only when I got home that I stopped getting with girls as often (only 1 since last summer) and I think WTF is wrong with me?

I love being single. I enjoy being beholden to no one, and no one being beholden to me. The only downside is the lack of regular sex, but most relationships I've been in were long distance, so it was intermittent anyway. *shrug* whatcha gonna do?

I find being single as a double edged sword. On one side I really enjoy have my freedom and being completely free from having to answer to anybody. Right now I can come and go with whomever I please and not have to worry about any repercussions of doing what I want when I want. But on the flipside, I really do miss the companionship. I miss sharing with a woman in my life. I get a little bummed out sometimes. But right now my focus is on school and I don't know how well a relationship would fit into the equation. If I were to meet a woman that really put me head over heels, I think I would try to make it fit.

I like being alone sometimes..

but right now, I hate it. So much. But, I know if I went out with someone I'd be unhappy with them.. and the other person doesn't deserve them. Getting out of serious relationships fucking suck.. I feel like I'm going to be fucked up over it forever. Or, a long time anyways.

Stupid brain never stops working against me sometimes.. I should be happy I'm alone.

It's not that I crave flesh. More that I crave being somebody's someone. I obsess over them, and they become the only thing that can choose how I'm feeling.

I have to be alone when nwlinkvxd's away at college for two weeks at a time. So when it comes to the weekend I get to see him, I am all over him and need constant attention, or I feel like a neglected animal.