Things you've said/heard DURING sex...
 

It had to be done :lol:

Heard:
Dont move! pant pant... Okay, move!

Said:
Laughter at above statement
Ow! (after knocking myself in the head with my own foot :crazy:)

Heard:
Here, can we do this? :shifting into some weird position:
Do you like this?
I love you.

Said (in reply to those above):
Pant pant pant...This isn't working...
:nod nod:
I...l-l-love... -or- :whisper: I love you too?

And...
HEHEH DID YOU HEAR ME QUEEF?!?!? HEHEHEH...:D :lol:

I seem to remember asking, "Can we go get something to eat?" during a sex session. I was bored at the moment, and about twenty pounds heavier at the time. We ended up getting dressed and going to get pizza.

Oddest thing I've ever heard was "Fuck me Daddy, Fuck Me!" This girl was defnitely into the passion, and didnt even remember saying it. It gives me a good laugh to bring it up.

Yeah, my boyfriend once asked: Who's your daddy?

And then he also told me that I look healthy down there.

I like bringing it up for a good laugh, too. I'll call him Dr (Last Name). Heh.

ive gotten "is it in yet"
thankfully, no it wasnt

Heard: "Fuck me, baby!"
Said in reply: "I love you, too."

Well, as I've only had sex once, the funniest thing I ever said was *Phhrrtt*.
And yes, that is the sound you make when you squeeze her titties together and blow, making a farting-noise.
Thankfully she had a sence of humor :lol:

Heard: A lot of crazy stuff (hehehe fallenangel)

Said: A lot of crazy stuff back

let's just leave it at that

Heard - "Are you sure this is a good idea?" (I had broken my ankle that morning)
Said - "Nope" (but I kept going anyways)

^ - Ohhh dear... /me *blushes furiously*

Heard - "My parent's home!"
Said - "Fuck em"

Said to me by an exgf:

I am not sucking that after its been in my ass.

but the funniest thing i ever heard was a noise she made after having sex in an uncomfortable place, and Im not talking about the backseat of a VW.

Sounds like the time Nwlinkvxd and I had sex the next day after I had gotten my wisdom teeth out.

Or when he induced a period. 'Oh look, you're bleeding...oh well.'

Heard:
"Wow, that feels amaz-, ow. No, too far."
"Where the hell did you learn to.. *dissolves into gibberish*"

While I was 17, during the night of girlfriend's 18th birthday.

Said:
"Hows does child abuse feels?!"

Eh....

No no no no no please no!!! (said as I was pulling out of her and threatening to get dressed)

Heard: "BRANDI!!! WHAT IS THAT IN YOUR MOUTH?!?!?!?" "What does it look like"

it went downhill from there...

(we were on the couch and her mother walked in..)

Things said by my partner during sex...wow, umm..lemme think, "I've been doing my excercises, can you tell"
Me: "deep moan" (PCG excercises)


her..:"Don't get it in my hair"
me: "Whooopsie"

there are others...

hehehehe i love kevin smith
my favorite was when i was on top of this guy and he kept sayin "thatta girl.." i dunno why but it was a turn on :)
one time i asked a guy how his father was doing... i guess i was gettin bored but he didn't seem to like the fact that i was thinking about his dad during sex :confused:

She's on top grinding away, and she's gotten up a pretty good sweat, and I hear,

"your turn to do the work, I'm tired!"

Never really thought about it like work. But it's really one of the few jobs I couldn't complain about doing!

I have a filthy mouth and anyone who doesn't will be gagged for good reason.

My last sexual encounter went something like this.....
I don't remember what he had to say,Wasn't important.
I remember saying..


Mmmmm fuck. Yes Daddy,I am your sweet little whore,Spit on me so I can bounce on your big cock,uh huh... mmmmm yeah,I fucking love you too Sir.Spank my ass?..Smack!Harder please Sir?Smack!I want more,fuck me harder, more,more,more.Hold my hair tightly,hold my throat too...C'mere and fuck my pretty mouth.Oh yea,Give me more,C'mon untie me,Let me touch you....Bite my shoulder,Hurt me Sir,I deserve it.Harder,faster,hold me tighter,Dont be soft,Break me in two you sexy fucker.Why wont you hurt me?.. Fuck me proper you pussy,I need it.uh..um.. babe.. don't slow down...whatsa matter? C'mon,untie me,Are you okay? Soft?... it's fucking soft..You are soft,You fuck like a fairy,I can't believe I scared you,You are a pussy,I like this game!I love this game! You cracked like a14 year old girl.. Pussy! (sound of bong shattering) I'm going to sit under the water,You should go home.

Needless to say..I'm single and he wants to marry me.


If anyone is an experienced player of... that game.. pm me.

I put on my robe and wizard hat...

SCORE! :lol:

Anywho, I just got laid last night, and lots and lots of things were said that night.
While i was fingering her ass while we were at it doggy-style she told me that I needed to get my finger out, she couldn't focus enough on just the regular sex :P

Heard: "OooOOooo-" *thunk*"-ow, fuck" (she hit her head on the wall while tossing her head in what I would assume was ecstacy)

Said: "It's just some salsa to go with the taco..."

Heard- "i cant do this to both of you at the same time, you have to play rock, paper, scissors of something"

Said - "well fuck me"
Heard- "just did"
said - "good point"

heard- you bastards better not be out there smoking without me! (have to love stoner chicks:p )


heard- will you fucking stop shagging next to me, it's hard enough to skin up on this bed as it is (once again, you have to love stoner chicks)
said- allow that
heard- right, ok, thats it, if your not gona let me skin up, i'm just gona have to join in


said-i can't believe i'm not gona remember this tomorrow


heard-i'm having a threesome!
I said- no-one gives a fucking damn amy!
mate said- wheres em and jane?
*scramble to get upstairs'

Are we going to tell your wife? : X

I wish that your brother would have stayed longer......

and You'd better clean that fucking mess up!

and to the one boy...Fuck up.love,fuck up.

Friend told me this story:
OK, her and her boyfriend have a mutual female friend called Deeba.
She is lying back, he boyfriend is fingering her, she moans "Ooh, deeper", but doesn't form her p that well. There was an awkward silence, followed by laughter.

said: Saddle up
*confused look

heard: Jesus Christ I just came five times, I did't know I could do that (felt pretty good to hear)

also heard: whoa, look at the couch (huge wet spot)

I wish I had some funny ones but unfortuantly I do not, though I think an old gf passed out during sex for a min or two (I was pretty lit my self) cause I was fucking her from behind and smacking her ass really hard and I got no response at all. I only noticed when I looked back. mainly its just the usual "you like that don't you?" and "tell me you fucking like that"

gf's passing out is fun...

just find that spot and keep her there until she just goes dead

ahh..memories

Man, my ex was like that- I loved that about her. The "i'm your slut, daddy" game is the best. Nothing better for rough sex than that, and nothing better than good, rough sex. :)

Heard: "Aye Papi"
Moans, deep breathing.

Heard: " Oh shit my dad's home ! AND HE'S A COP !!!"
ME: pants pants where the hell are my pants.

HIM: "damn, you make me want to just burst!" -or something to that extent....

I love hearing that.......

best one for me

heard: Are we running a marathon (during a long session)

and from a friend and his wife

heard: lets change possions (shuffle, thunk) ouch the floor is hard..

don't......

stop.......

don't.....

stop......

no,... don't.... stop... :)

Him....." oh oh Mrs. Simpson"

Me in the act with sons best friend...." fine ...gasp...for you to call me *****"

BOOYAH!

"is that a cat licking my ass?"