im just a girl

so here it is. i've been in love with the same boy for as long as i can remember. he's perfect in my eyes... talented, incredible looking, and completely unaware of both. i've known him for years, and our relationship didn't start out ideally. i liked him, and he had no interest for me because he barely knew me. as time went on, we talked more and more until he said that he grew fond of me, and now we're pretty close. the problem is, i still have very definate feelings for him, and i'm unsure of what to do about it. i can't imagine him thinking of me as anything more than a friend, but he's not exactly the type of guy to let a girl know that he likes them. (he's very shy about that kind of stuff) i've been getting the hint lately that he might feel something, but i'm scared to ask him because i don't want him to feel uncomfortable in our friendship. is there a way to find out his feelings about me without making it seem like i'm coming on to him, or making him really uncomfortable? or is it just best to leave things alone and try to forget about my feelings? i'd rather have him as a friend than as nothing at all.

wilbjammin

Why would he reject you as a friend because you like him as more than that? At the least you two should be able to work through it as friends, you might just need a break. Fear can be used to cripple anything that you want if you aren't willing to take those last steps to get it. Just put the ball in his court and don't let it ruin things is the result isn't what you want... and be patient if he doesn't know what to think right away, don't push too hard (at the beginning, you need an answer eventually).

__________________
Innominate.

MSD

If he's anything like me, he's afraid to lose you as a friend, and really wishes you would give him some sort of sign about what you're really feeling about him. Go for it. Tell him there's somethign you really wanted to do for a while, then kiss him. that's how one of my friends got together with his current girlfriend. Don't be afraid. Just do it.

thebiz

Hes a guy. Guys want chicks. You should seriously go for it. He wouldn't hang out with you if he didn't like you. Guys do not have the same hangups as girls for going from a friendship to a dating relationship.

__________________
Thebiz. Hes so hot right now. Thebiz.

diddagirl

Dont just leave things as is. You will never know if something great could develop between the two of you. Just be honest and let him know how you feel, in a non threatening way. Let him know that regardless of how he feels, you still want to keep the friendship. Good luck!

__________________
"Is it so small a thing to have enjoyed the sun, to have lived long in the spring, to have loved, to have thought, to have done."
-Matthew Arnold

analog

Kiss the boy already! lol
How old are you two, sounds like a high school romance.

anti fishstick

ah, the days of highschool romance :-D


there's really nothing here that can jeopardize your friendship. that's what's so great about being friends first--whether it works itself out into a relationship or not--you will always have the friendship there. i've come to find that relationships that start off as friendships are generally better because you've already set the groundwork and you already KNOW eachother..

so, you've nothing to lose really. take everyone's advice and go for it

__________________
And the day came when the risk to remain tight in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom.
~Anais Nin

Slims

If you express your feelings for him, and he is unable or unwilling to reciprocate, you will remain friends.

Unless he is a complete asshole in the worst case situation he will still be your friend, and if anything, will be flattered that you dig him.

And of course, you can probably guess the best case scenario....

But if you keep your feelings to yourself, you will never have a chance. Besides, what if he feels the same way but, like you, doesn't know how to express his feelings?

__________________
"Socialism is a philosophy of failure, the creed of ignorance, and the gospel of envy, its inherent virtue is the equal sharing of misery." - Winston Churchill

"All men dream: but not equally. Those who dream by night in the dusty recesses of their minds wake in the day to find that it was vanity: but the dreamers of the day are dangerous men, for they may act out their dream with open eyes, to make it possible." Seven Pillars of Wisdom, T.E. Lawrence

im just a girl

i'm 20, he's 21. the kicker is, he knows i've been attracted to him in the past, and he's never shared those feelings. but ever since we've become better friends i've wondered if he feels something now too. but i can't stop that feeling in the back of my mind that we're friends now mainly because he doesn't feel threatened by the possibility of me liking him (i try to act like we're just friends)

Yalaynia

All I can tell you is DONT make the same mistake I did. I was 13 at the time I met him. He just moved in down the street from me. I new his father ever since I could remember but I didnt know that he had a kid, and it was just something that never came up. His ex girlfriend/wife got remarried and pretty much shiped his son to him and said its your turn to take care of him. Anyways he introduced me to his son. We started hanging out and became close friends but I developed this huge teenage crush on him. I never said anything to him because I was to shy not to mention afraid to tell him. When I finally got up the nerve to say something it was to late, he was dating a girl he met from our school. When he broke up with her I was 14 and already dating someone else. Eventually as I got older I found my feelings for him were getting stronger, but I still couldnt say anything because by this time I had been dating the same guy for 2 years. There were always suble hints that there was something more but neither one of us said anything (we never kissed or anything). We would be sitting on the couch and he would do the old YAWN STRETCH arm around my shoulder thing, or the one thing I thought was very sweet and that was to lay a pillow on his lap and lay my head down when he saw that I was getting tired. Well to make this long story go faster one night I had a fight with my boyfriend and thought ok this is the end and I really want to tell this other person how I felt. I was walking home around 9 or so at night and because I pass his house I figured I would stop in and say hi and pretty much spill my guts to him. Walking up the driveway things seemed a little odd. I could see in the window and pictures that used to be on the wall were now gone and the truck was loaded with boxes and furniture (I know you can see where this is going) my friend was standing in his now empty kitchen, and of course I was in shock and stuned. I asked the stupid question "whatcha doing? (as if I couldnt see) He said he was moving, and I was like oh. I walked up to him gave him a half hearted hug , a peck on the cheek and said "keep in touch". In reality I wanted to walk up give him the biggest hug and kiss I could lay on him and tell him I loved him. I was 16 when he moved and I never saw him again. I regret not telling him how I was feeling when I had the chance, but at the time I didnt know it was going to be the last time.

__________________
I couldnt think of anything to put here , but I guess anything would do

dragon2fire

i would say more but thats the best advice your gona get