winning her back
 

so yeah, i'm not positive that this belongs in this forum, or another, but i'll try it here anyway, there's a lot more traffic though this one anyway.

Sorry for the background story you have to read.

so i was going out w/this great girl, for about 10 months. she eventually broke up with me, because basicly i wasnt giving her enough attention. anyway, she (we'll call her sarah for the sake of using names) then began going out w/another guy (we'll call him jack (short for jack-off)) and they broke up a couple days ago. Now, we're still good friends (me and sarah, not me and jack) and it's a well known fact that i'm still intested in her. What i'm looking for is some ideas of things i can do to win her back to me.

what i'm not looking for is the string of comments telling me to just move on. i actually have a laundry list of girls i'm after, basicly all at the same time, sarah is just my favorite (and of course the one i'm most comfortable with). i dont consider myself to be stuck on her, if somebody better came along, i'd jump at her in a red hot minute.

So, any ideas?

oh yeah, the attention thing. i belive i have that under control, basicly i'm a computer junkie. i'd spend more time on it then i should have, neglecting her.

How bout apologizing and promising it won't happen again?

But here's the thing. You have to make her see that you know what it was like for her, being neglected like that. How alone she felt, how she probably wondered what was wrong with her, whether you liked her at all, whether she'd done something wrong... TELL her you saw her suffering these things.

In other words, don't apologize for the neglect--apologize for how you made her feel by neglecting her.

well, it's my fault, but not 100%, only because she didnt put her full effort into telling me what was happening before it was too far advancted for her. i can be blind sometimes. I have said i'm sorry, and promised to try not to let it happen again. I know i can't compltetly change and be positive it'll *never ever* happen again, but i can try, and she can smack me in the head or something if i start it again.

Apologizing doesn't always get you far as I learnt with my ex.. she's just purely not interested in me as a person/friend etc, which kind of sux but oh well.

Tell her that you are still interested, and will try to fix the problems you are facing with her at the moment - because you don't want to lose her...

Just tell her how you feel.

oh, i'm compltetly transparent on that point.