how long should you wait? - Tilted Forum Project Discussion Community

20x6 · 09-12-2003, 03:52 PM

how long should you wait before having sex with someone?

i'm not asking about how old you should be but how many times you've gone out with the person before you do the deed.

I've found that if i sleep with a girl on the first date i lose respect for her and most likely will never call her again, i dont feel bad in this situation becuase she probably had the same intentions as well.

so back to my question...how many dates before you add another notch on your headboard, and still have mutual respect for each other?

yournamehere · 09-12-2003, 06:01 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by 20x6
I've found that if i sleep with a girl on the first date i lose respect for her and most likely will never call her again

In that case, you must not have any self respect, because she sure as hell wasn't the only one having sex.

Why the double standard?

Sure - there are such things as meaningless one-night stands, and if it was a mutually decided thing - that's okay. But what's wrong with first-date sex if you hit it off and both feel comfortable with each other?

Hell - I know I'm worth sleeping with on the first date!
(well - at least I <i>was</i> - back when I was single and dated

)

ShaniFaye · 09-12-2003, 06:13 PM

I know in half an hour of meeting someone if I will ever consider sleeping with them....therefore if he's up for it on the first date...IT'S ON!! lol

spudman61 · 09-12-2003, 06:22 PM

Wow only half an hour huh?

meff · 09-12-2003, 06:53 PM

Wait till you find someone you're in love with, it'll make it all the better plus you'll have something nice to remember in the future. Why don't you ask her when she'll be ready? I dunno why she wouldn't tell you.. Just say your interested?

Good luck.

Plan9Senior · 09-12-2003, 07:44 PM

My rule is the third or fourth date. Anything longer then that is a waste of your time and money, and don't let anybody tell you different

maximus · 09-12-2003, 07:48 PM

i think the double standard thing is a good point, mabee you should learn to respect yourself before you pass judgemnt on others.

Robblee · 09-12-2003, 07:51 PM

I found a month or so to work well if you want a balanced relationship, just make sure your both ready because if you really love and respect the other person you'll wait as long as it takes.

siryn · 09-13-2003, 01:50 PM

Kudos to yournamehere, for expressing my exact sentiments. I opened this thread only to close it after reading the opening post. I was disgusted, and didn't want to participate in a conversation about how many dates it takes for a guy to have respect for a girl - wtf? As you said, yes, there are such things as one night stands, but there are also people who just mesh and consider themselves ready to express it quickly. The idea of including respectability in sex is from the dark ages, my friend.

bradexample · 09-13-2003, 06:34 PM

a week.

Slims · 09-13-2003, 08:14 PM

I think you should wait until you read this post.
And then use your judgment. If you think both of you are ok w/ doing the deed, then go for it. If not, wait.

Shyla Loral · 09-13-2003, 08:17 PM

People have *rules* for this shit? Man, like the relationships between men and women aren't complicated enough. I think that people should care about each other before they fuck. It's like in Clerks "If I like someone, I just go down on them. I only sleep with the ones that I love, and I love you, Dante."

So, the moral is, just go down on them

Battlefield · 09-13-2003, 08:47 PM

Jessica Simpson's boyfriend waited something like 4 years? maybe not quite that long. Anyways...if my wife looked like that I'd say it was worth the wait.

09-12-2003, 03:52 PM	#1 (permalink)
20x6 Upright	how long should you wait? how long should you wait before having sex with someone? i'm not asking about how old you should be but how many times you've gone out with the person before you do the deed. I've found that if i sleep with a girl on the first date i lose respect for her and most likely will never call her again, i dont feel bad in this situation becuase she probably had the same intentions as well. so back to my question...how many dates before you add another notch on your headboard, and still have mutual respect for each other?

09-12-2003, 06:13 PM	#3 (permalink)
ShaniFaye Submit to me, you know you want to Location: Lilburn, Ga	I know in half an hour of meeting someone if I will ever consider sleeping with them....therefore if he's up for it on the first date...IT'S ON!! lol __________________ *I want the diabetic plan that comes with rollover carbs. I dont like the unused one expiring at midnite!!*

09-12-2003, 06:53 PM	#5 (permalink)
meff Vanishing, like I do.. Location: Austin, TX	Wait till you find someone you're in love with, it'll make it all the better plus you'll have something nice to remember in the future. Why don't you ask her when she'll be ready? I dunno why she wouldn't tell you.. Just say your interested? Good luck. __________________ Toy-like people make me boy-like.

09-12-2003, 07:48 PM	#7 (permalink)
maximus Crazy Location: Pa	i think the double standard thing is a good point, mabee you should learn to respect yourself before you pass judgemnt on others. __________________ i don't want to be lonely, i just want to be alone.

09-13-2003, 08:14 PM	#11 (permalink)
Slims Eccentric insomniac Location: North Carolina	I think you should wait until you read this post. And then use your judgment. If you think both of you are ok w/ doing the deed, then go for it. If not, wait. __________________ "Socialism is a philosophy of failure, the creed of ignorance, and the gospel of envy, its inherent virtue is the equal sharing of misery." - Winston Churchill "All men dream: but not equally. Those who dream by night in the dusty recesses of their minds wake in the day to find that it was vanity: but the dreamers of the day are dangerous men, for they may act out their dream with open eyes, to make it possible." Seven Pillars of Wisdom, T.E. Lawrence

09-12-2003, 06:22 PM	#4 (permalink)
spudman61 Upright	Wow only half an hour huh?

09-12-2003, 07:44 PM	#6 (permalink)
Plan9Senior Banned Location: Orange County, California	My rule is the third or fourth date. Anything longer then that is a waste of your time and money, and don't let anybody tell you different

09-12-2003, 07:51 PM	#8 (permalink)
Robblee Tilted Location: Nova Scotia	I found a month or so to work well if you want a balanced relationship, just make sure your both ready because if you really love and respect the other person you'll wait as long as it takes.

09-13-2003, 01:50 PM	#9 (permalink)
siryn Tilted Location: Long Beach CA	Kudos to yournamehere, for expressing my exact sentiments. I opened this thread only to close it after reading the opening post. I was disgusted, and didn't want to participate in a conversation about how many dates it takes for a guy to have respect for a girl - wtf? As you said, yes, there are such things as one night stands, but there are also people who just mesh and consider themselves ready to express it quickly. The idea of including respectability in sex is from the dark ages, my friend.

09-13-2003, 06:34 PM	#10 (permalink)
bradexample Psycho Location: new york	a week.

09-13-2003, 08:17 PM	#12 (permalink)
Shyla Loral Crazy Location: Austin	People have rules for this shit? Man, like the relationships between men and women aren't complicated enough. I think that people should care about each other before they fuck. It's like in Clerks "If I like someone, I just go down on them. I only sleep with the ones that I love, and I love you, Dante." So, the moral is, just go down on them __________________ "Three may keep a secret, if two of them are dead" Ben Franklin, Poor Richard's Almanac. Meff r0x

09-13-2003, 08:47 PM	#13 (permalink)
Battlefield Crazy	Jessica Simpson's boyfriend waited something like 4 years? maybe not quite that long. Anyways...if my wife looked like that I'd say it was worth the wait.