There is so much to human emotion. - Tilted Forum Project Discussion Community

GrayWolf · 09-08-2003, 09:52 PM

I don't know how long I've struggled with being a hopeless romantic. I guess more accuratly I should say, I don't know how long I've struggled with wanting to be loved.

I'm sure my friend on here is going to give me some hell about this, but I'll post it anyway.

I wish I knew why this is such a struggle for me...or why it is even that important. Through all the relationships I've been in, I don't think I've ever felt truly...comforted. You know that feeling when it's a cold night, and you can just wrap yourself up in a blanket and pillow, and feel...I don't know...protected? Comforted? Not alone?

When I was younger, I thought that cuddling with someone would solve all my problems. After a while, I realized that cuddling (while a wonderful thing) doesn't fill that void.

Then I thought that perhaps it was fooling around that filled said void...Now that was quickly dispelled.

It progressed to saying "I love you" and eventually having sex...and to be totally honest, I feel little difference then I felt all those years ago.

There is incredible weight that goes into true togetherness that very few people, in my opinion, can truly recognise. It's amazing how many qualities and requirements must be taken into consideration where mates are concerned.
Perhaps it's just me and my high standards, but I really can't remember a time I've been satisfied with someone I've dated.

I know this post seems like a pitty-drawing post, but in reality, I'm just posting my thoughts...this seems like the place.

Those of you in love are truly lucky. ...No, not lucky. Just...oh I wish I could describe it.

Maybe this should have gone under another section...I don't know.

anleja · 09-08-2003, 10:26 PM

I'm sure your standards are not too high, you just have not met the person who is right for you. I wish you luck.

At least you know what feelings you are looking for, so when you finally do find someone who makes you feel that way, well, you have a keeper!

And, of course, the only one who can make you truly happy is yourself.

GrayWolf · 09-08-2003, 10:27 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by anleja
And, of course, the only one who can make you truly happy is yourself.

I loose sight of that way too much. Thank you.

Minx · 09-09-2003, 09:23 AM

This isn't a pity-drawing post at all. There is something very incredible about that special person (when and if you find them) who can make you feel like you are on top of the world. And while it is very true that you are the only person who can truly make you happy....it sure is nice to have someone to share the special moments in life, and to have someone to love, cherish and support when things are tough. It is the most priceless thing in the world, in my opinion.
Good things come to those who wait.....be patient and you will find the one who makes you feel good inside.

skysooner · 09-09-2003, 09:52 AM

For years, I was with the right person but didn't completely realize it. It took us going to the brink of separating during a difficult time in our marriage that we really realized what we meant to each other. We vowed never to let that happen to us again, and now we reaffirm each other every chance we get. Is it totally perfect all of the time. No, it is not, but it is just about perfect 95% of the time and that is better than most people will ever have.

It takes time, the right person and hard work to reach a stage such as this. It just doesn't magically happen, and you have to really like yourself (not in an arrogant cocky way but in the I'm good as I am kind of way) for it to happen.

analog · 09-10-2003, 12:25 AM

I've always liked to think of this type of situation as a jigsaw puzzle.

I'm sure you remember those- sometimes you'd get the racecar or cartoon character, with the picture on the box, and those were easy because you knew what you were expecting from the beginning, and when pieces were missing ("will cuddling cure it", "will sex make me feel closer") you could just look at the holes and gauge what you could do to solve the puzzle.

In your case, you have the hard puzzle. It's that picture of something you didn't know existed let alone know what it looks like, and someone threw away the box with the picture on it. So right now, you're looking at some holes in a picture you can't make out for shit, so how can you expect to know what will go in those holes to complete the puzzle?

Well, when you find the right person for you, those last pieces will fall into place, and the finished puzzle will be the most beautiful thing you've ever seen in your whole life. This is what you're looking for.

09-08-2003, 09:52 PM	#1 (permalink)
GrayWolf Tilted	There is so much to human emotion. I don't know how long I've struggled with being a hopeless romantic. I guess more accuratly I should say, I don't know how long I've struggled with wanting to be loved. I'm sure my friend on here is going to give me some hell about this, but I'll post it anyway. I wish I knew why this is such a struggle for me...or why it is even that important. Through all the relationships I've been in, I don't think I've ever felt truly...comforted. You know that feeling when it's a cold night, and you can just wrap yourself up in a blanket and pillow, and feel...I don't know...protected? Comforted? Not alone? When I was younger, I thought that cuddling with someone would solve all my problems. After a while, I realized that cuddling (while a wonderful thing) doesn't fill that void. Then I thought that perhaps it was fooling around that filled said void...Now that was quickly dispelled. It progressed to saying "I love you" and eventually having sex...and to be totally honest, I feel little difference then I felt all those years ago. There is incredible weight that goes into true togetherness that very few people, in my opinion, can truly recognise. It's amazing how many qualities and requirements must be taken into consideration where mates are concerned. Perhaps it's just me and my high standards, but I really can't remember a time I've been satisfied with someone I've dated. I know this post seems like a pitty-drawing post, but in reality, I'm just posting my thoughts...this seems like the place. Those of you in love are truly lucky. ...No, not lucky. Just...oh I wish I could describe it. Maybe this should have gone under another section...I don't know.

09-09-2003, 09:23 AM	#4 (permalink)
Minx Junkie Location: Up yonder	This isn't a pity-drawing post at all. There is something very incredible about that special person (when and if you find them) who can make you feel like you are on top of the world. And while it is very true that you are the only person who can truly make you happy....it sure is nice to have someone to share the special moments in life, and to have someone to love, cherish and support when things are tough. It is the most priceless thing in the world, in my opinion. Good things come to those who wait.....be patient and you will find the one who makes you feel good inside. __________________ You've been a naughty boy....go to my room!

09-08-2003, 10:26 PM	#2 (permalink)
anleja disconnected Location: ignoreland	I'm sure your standards are not too high, you just have not met the person who is right for you. I wish you luck. At least you know what feelings you are looking for, so when you finally do find someone who makes you feel that way, well, you have a keeper! And, of course, the only one who can make you truly happy is yourself.

09-09-2003, 09:52 AM	#5 (permalink)
skysooner Registered User Location: Oklahoma	For years, I was with the right person but didn't completely realize it. It took us going to the brink of separating during a difficult time in our marriage that we really realized what we meant to each other. We vowed never to let that happen to us again, and now we reaffirm each other every chance we get. Is it totally perfect all of the time. No, it is not, but it is just about perfect 95% of the time and that is better than most people will ever have. It takes time, the right person and hard work to reach a stage such as this. It just doesn't magically happen, and you have to really like yourself (not in an arrogant cocky way but in the I'm good as I am kind of way) for it to happen.

09-10-2003, 12:25 AM	#6 (permalink)
analog Banned	I've always liked to think of this type of situation as a jigsaw puzzle. I'm sure you remember those- sometimes you'd get the racecar or cartoon character, with the picture on the box, and those were easy because you knew what you were expecting from the beginning, and when pieces were missing ("will cuddling cure it", "will sex make me feel closer") you could just look at the holes and gauge what you could do to solve the puzzle. In your case, you have the hard puzzle. It's that picture of something you didn't know existed let alone know what it looks like, and someone threw away the box with the picture on it. So right now, you're looking at some holes in a picture you can't make out for shit, so how can you expect to know what will go in those holes to complete the puzzle? Well, when you find the right person for you, those last pieces will fall into place, and the finished puzzle will be the most beautiful thing you've ever seen in your whole life. This is what you're looking for.