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I'm Chinese Buddhist w/French/Irish/English Canadian Catholic. Her grandparents were the most resistant and my parents gave up on me marrying/dating Chinese ages ago...LOL!
Growing up in New Brunswick in the 70's and 80's, I've grown quite a thick skin to jeers, whispers and such. In 2005 we took a cross Canada road trip and it was her first time experiencing of blatant bigotry and at times was quite uncomfortable when we had to fill up, stop to eat, etc, in the smaller towns. In a small town in Alberta, we were having lunch in a quaint cafe and a woman discreetly slipped a note to me that we had 5mins to eat up, pay get out. When we got to Calgary to see my sister and her husband (white), it was my wife and I that got more attention than my sis and her husband when the Calgary Stampede was going on and the "good ol' boys" flocked in. Religious differences aside, IME/HO, it's more of a challenge when it's the male that's of "color" in an interracial relationship. Can't we all frikken get along...LOL! |
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education is vital, if only to open up your (and your parents) mind to understand other ways of life. if only for your sake. at the end of the day, a muslim is the same as the next person. we all want the same thing. believing in a certain religion does not make someone a monster. i certainly do not have those traits that your parents speak of, and quite frankly find it quite offensive. as for your friends, i'd drop them in a flash if they were treating you and your relationship in that fashin |
I am white and married to a black guy, no one really seems to care unless we go to a super small towns with close minded people. We just as a general rule avoid going to little shit towns like those.
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I've dated women of other ethnicities before and have no problem with it.
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I'd imagine a more 'response provoking' question would ask, "How do you feel about other ethnicities dating women of your race?" I thought actinic brought up a good point. Most men will be ok with their own race dating other ethnicities, but when it comes to other men dating their ethnicity, ire arises.
Then again, guys tend to be competitive and consider some attractive woman's boyfriend inferior to themselves... |
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Every time I see a thread with something like this in the title, is about the only time I actually consider/realize that I'm in an interracial relationship.
It simply doesn't matter. Hasn't for the last 4 years. Just came back from a trip to Japan, to meet my gf's other side of the family, and even there I didn't notice a single person looking twice at me for not being Japanese. My cousin is dating a black girl; And my niece (other part of the family) hangs out & has dated several spanish guys. And we all grew up in a little shit-village as so eloquently put by somebody earlier in this thread. I suppose if you let it bother you, ... |
It is social behavior evolved out of so many generations. It has a purpose.
Now the power of YOUR love can beat it :) |
As someone who is half black/white, every relationship I've been in has been with someone of a different race. :) I have dealt with prejudiced comments and outright slurs from people I'm blood related to, so I can say I have enough varying viewpoints to confidently say that all of it is silly and if you love someone go love them. Other people and their reactions are something to consider, but only for your reaction to them, not a reason to not pursue things with someone not like you or what someone else wants for you.
EDIT: Removed response to belle_enigma because I didn't finish reading the thread and I'm a terrible person that can't read good and stuff. |
As a parent, with several married children, I must say that no one seems good enough for your child while they are dating, particularly if they have a stormy relationship. But if they love your child, and treat him/her well, pretty soon they become good enough in your parental heart. What a parent really wants is for their child to be/ to find happiness. Some differences in a mate will not fit the image in a parent's mind, but that will be overcome when the child is happy with their mate over time. That's my experience.
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I have dated may girls of other races. They were filled with the same joys and sorrows of any other relationship. The only odd momemts were suplied by my own family when they awkwardly went out of their way to show how cool they were with me dating a black girl. My ex just laughed and said that they were just trying to be nice. It was a bit uncomfortable. Had we dated longer I am sure all would have been normal.
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I'm Dutch Protestant, and my fiancee is Jewish. We haven't had any issues from the friends, but it definitely has taken the family a while to warm up to us! Fortunately, she's amazing, so they're coming around :)
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as an asian, i pretty much ONLY date inter-racially. I am not around a strong asian community so I have always dated caucasian men. I don't see a problem with it and I haven't noticed anyone bothered by it. I think it is more "accepted" for an asian female to date a caucasian male, however. If it were the other way around it might be different.
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Following the, "Oriental Girl" phenomenon, I am a first generation Chinese Canadian and I have never really given thought about the "inter racial couples". It is just normal. When my parents met my boyfriend, they thought he was just a normal white guy. I never really bothered to tell them his cultural background; i didn't think i needed to. My friends are as diverse as the city is and I never really thought about it.
Later, my parents realized that he was mostly Scottish and a bit Aboriginal; had they not already had a good impression of him, things could have gone really differently. I wouldn't say that my parents are consciously racist, but they do have little racists moments that come out that i call out on. I honestly believe that it is because they grew up in a different time and even when there are individuals that "stereotype" mould, there are always excuses for them. And this goes for many people, not just my parents. In my large extended family, I am the only one who is in a serious relationship with a non-Chinese person. I don't know what they think of him, but I think the world of him and I love him dearly and that is all that matters. (Though, my grandma did say that I "had tons of time to find a nice chinese boy" at the first impression, but has changed her opinion since) |
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