Please celebrate the First of May... - Tilted Forum Project Discussion Community

Redlemon · 05-01-2008, 03:47 AM

I expect that most of you already know the fine song by Jonathan Coulton, and therefore don't need to read any further. For those of you who don't, here's the song "First of May":

Or, if you are at work, you might want to just read the lyrics instead:

lyrics click to show

Doesn't look good for me this year... chance of showers, about 43 degrees tonight. But I'll see if my wife is up for it anyway!

And thus once again I fulfill my duty as the announcer of sexual holidays on this board. Get out there and fuck.

Charlatan · 05-01-2008, 03:50 AM

The first of May is a public holiday here (labour day)... I celebrated by going to work.

I don't know if I will be getting that sort of action.

ratbastid · 05-01-2008, 09:58 AM

lurkette is out of town, but StellaLuna and I have definite plans to celebrate.

What's a little weird is... the first time I heard the song, I was in the car with Stella and her (now) ex-husband...

Redlemon · 05-01-2008, 10:24 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ratbastid

lurkette is out of town, but StellaLuna and I have definite plans to celebrate.

"I called up my old lady
She wasn’t home so I called my girl"

Man, you do live the life, don't you?

This picture makes me happy:

snowy · 05-01-2008, 12:19 PM

Yeah, it's still too cold for outdoor sex here. The weather didn't get the memo, I guess.

Redlemon · 05-02-2008, 05:34 AM

Last night was cold, damp, and my wife was crampy and not in the mood to receive. But, I got a boobjob* inside as a partial celebration, so not all bad.

*Our preferred term for "tit fuck". It just sounds happer.

ratbastid · 05-02-2008, 07:38 AM

Mission accomplished, over here.

Redlemon · 04-28-2009, 09:50 AM

Hey, I remembered to bump this thread before May 1st this time!

I'd also like to share a song that we're working on in my singing group.

"Ce moys de may, ce moys de may,
ce moys de may, ma verte cotte,
ce moys de may, ma verte cotte,
ce moys de may, je vestiray.
De bon matin me l veray,
ce joly, joly moys de may.
De bon matin me l veray:
Un sault, deux saults, trois saults,
en rue je feray,
Pour voir si mon amy verray.
Je luy diray qu'il me descotte;
Me descottant le baiseray."

It's French, from 1529, and translates to be much the same song as JC's:

This month of May
my green skirt (note: connotes "grass stained")
I'll wear
early in the morning, I'll rise
in this lovely month of May
one hop, two hops, three hops
into the street I'll make
to see if I'll see my friend
I'll tell him to remove my skirt
while he removes it, I'll kiss him.

Willravel · 04-28-2009, 10:05 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by snowy

Yeah, it's still too cold for outdoor sex here. The weather didn't get the memo, I guess.

This year, you have a new option!
Snuggie

You're welcome.

ratbastid · 04-28-2009, 10:08 AM

Everyone's going to be in town this year. Our First of May celebration will be a threesome.

ring · 04-28-2009, 01:45 PM

I was picturing May-baskets.

okay here ya' go.

YouTube - Lusty Month of May

lostgirl · 04-28-2009, 03:03 PM

I have to convince the SO, but I am totally down for this.

Charlatan · 04-28-2009, 03:47 PM

Celebrating with a long weekend but no action as such. Not worth getting arrested and deported if we get caught.

MSD · 04-29-2009, 09:31 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Charlatan

Celebrating with a long weekend but no action as such. Not worth getting arrested and deported if we get caught.

On the upside, telling that story should get you a free round of drinks anywhere you tell it.

JStrider · 04-29-2009, 09:10 PM

I'd be willing... if only I had a lady right now...

Plan9 · 04-30-2009, 06:16 AM

Oh, Jeebus Christi... I could have done without the f'n Snuggie reference.

Now I'm going to be soft for a week and unable to fulfill the challenge in this thread despite the perfect opportunity.

Thanks a lot, Will. Killed more boners than baseball.

snowy · 04-30-2009, 07:01 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Willravel

This year, you have a new option!
Snuggie

You're welcome.

Unless they have a version that's made of Gore-Tex, we're a no-go again this year. They're calling for rain tomorrow

lostgirl · 04-30-2009, 09:07 AM

Looks like I may not be able to either. My SO said it too cold in SF to accomplish such a thing.

I am still going to try.

Xerxys · 04-30-2009, 11:16 AM

**Put's his game face on!!**

Shaindra · 04-30-2009, 02:39 PM

I'd love to join, but I recently split with my best option and I don't really feel like pulling any of the other options into rotation just yet. :-(

Buk · 04-30-2009, 11:24 PM

Thread Derail- Jonathon Coulton blows my mind like everyday is the 1st of May... (that sounded less gay in my head)

My wife isnt too fond of outdoor sex, and I can't afford to get caught fucking someone else.

ratbastid · 05-01-2009, 05:41 AM

Yeah, probably rainy here tonight too...

lostgirl · 05-01-2009, 09:12 AM

This couple celebrated May 1st.

Quote:

(05-01) 07:40 PDT LONDON, United Kingdom (AP) --

Queen Elizabeth II was at home at Windsor Castle, the sentries who guard her were on duty, and the large park surrounding the magnificent building was full of tourists on a Sunday afternoon.

So it didn't take long for people to realize that something was out of order when an inebriated couple arrived from a nearby restaurant and began having sex on a grass bank outside the castle, according to witnesses.

"One window from the guardroom opened up and when a soldier saw what was going on he told his mates — and lots of windows opened up," witness Mark Robinson told The Sun newspaper.

"The couple did not care who was looking and just kept going as if they were in their own bedroom."

Japanese tourists filmed the couple, who only stopped when police officers arrived on the scene, witnesses said.

Thames Valley Police said the man and woman were arrested and given a written warning about outraging public decency.

The queen was in the castle at the time, but her office declined Friday to comment about what had happened.

From: Couple arrested for sex on lawn at Windsor Castle

ratbastid · 05-01-2009, 12:34 PM

I just emailed Jonathan that link... He should know.

Redlemon · 05-04-2009, 12:25 PM

Finally success for us. The rain stopped, and by evening it was a muggy 60 degrees outside. Not ideal conditions, but a couple of bathrobes and sandals was enough for the back deck. We're in a condo complex, so it was somewhat public as well.

Redlemon · 04-28-2010, 05:57 AM

Bump for 2010.

No opportunity for us this year, but hope it's fun for others. Please report back with good stories.

snowy · 04-28-2010, 06:37 AM

Saturday looks like it might actually be possible this year. No rain, partly cloudy, but only 59 degrees. I guess he can keep me warm

JStrider · 04-28-2010, 07:55 AM

Well I've got a girlfriend, and were going camping(with a bunch of crazy hashers) so I think I would be surprised if this didn't happen!

Charlatan · 04-28-2010, 04:44 PM

I will raise a toast to all those who attempt with extra wish that you will not be in flagrante delicto (unless that is your aim).

I am still in the land of exportation and caning (not the fun sort).

ratbastid · 04-29-2010, 03:29 PM

We're working on it. We have a houseguest, but... she's very liberal. So who knows.

JStrider · 05-03-2010, 06:27 AM

success for my girl and me.
Had a good romp in the woods at 1am saturday morning. and some in the tent later that day, not sure if the tent really counts, but its all good.

bobby · 05-03-2010, 06:51 AM

I got mine thanks to "My Old Lady" and the trashy trailer....xoxoxoo

Redlemon · 05-10-2010, 06:46 AM

I'm behind on my JC RSS feed, so I only just read this:

Quote:

Please Do Not Get Arrested

And if you do, please do not mention my name to the police.

It is a very special day in Coultonland, a day I like to call “The First of May.” This is a free country, or at least it was until Obama was elected,* and so I do not presume to tell you how to celebrate it. I have no doubt that whatever you do, you will be sure to obey the law and comply with local ordinances. Also please remember that poison ivy has three shiny pointy leaves.

I myself will mostly be staying indoors, but I have already rubbed a couple of butts – no, they were PORK BUTTS, and I rubbed them with SPICES you pervert. What is wrong with you? Later I’m going to cook them on the GIRL.

My gift to you is this mp3 of a relevant track from “BEST. CONCERT. EVER.” You do not have to get me anything, in fact, I think I would prefer that you didn’t.

http://www.whatarerecords.com/mp3s/J...rst_Of_May.mp3

Happy Spring!

* Sarcasm

05-01-2008, 03:47 AM	#1 (permalink)
Redlemon Devoted Donor Location: New England	Please celebrate the First of May... I expect that most of you already know the fine song by Jonathan Coulton, and therefore don't need to read any further. For those of you who don't, here's the song "First of May": Or, if you are at work, you might want to just read the lyrics instead: lyrics click to show I woke up this morning I had a scone and a large house blend And then a little conversation with my squirrel and chipmunk friends I said I’m sick and tired of winter And I wish that it was spring And then a little fellow named Robin Redbreast Began to sing And he sang Ooh ooh child, what’d you think the cold winter’s gonna last forever? Ooh ooh child, now’s the time for all the people to get together Outside Cause it’s the first of May, first of May Outdoor fucking starts today So bring your favorite lady Or at least your favorite lay The water’s not cold baby dip in your big toe Maybe I’ll see you in flagrante delicto Grass below you, sky above Celebrate spring with a crazy little thing called fucking outside I thanked him for the information I cried a little when he flew away I watched an episode of The People’s Court And I tried to plan my day I called up my old lady She wasn’t home so I called my girl I asked her if she’d like to join me as I Entertain the world And I said Ooh ooh child, I’ll bring a blanket and I promise I will brush the ants off Ooh ooh child, you’re gonna like it when we’re taking each other’s pants off Outside Cause it’s the first of May, first of May Outdoor fucking starts today So bring your favorite lady Or at least your favorite lay The water’s not cold baby dip in your big toe Maybe I’ll see you in flagrante delicto Grass below you, sky above Celebrate spring with a crazy little thing called fucking outside So we went to the park together We were walking in the midday sun We met all kinds of people and we We fucked everyone We fucked a lady who sells ice cream We fucked a man with a tan Shar Pei Everyone who needed fucking well they They got fucked today So come on Ooh ooh child, open your mind and your heart, feel the spirit moving through you Ooh ooh child, you’ll feel the warmth of the love when I stick it to you Outside Cause it’s the first of May, first of May Outdoor fucking starts today So bring your favorite lady Or at least your favorite lay The water’s not cold baby dip in your big toe Maybe I’ll see you in flagrante delicto Grass below you, sky above Celebrate spring with a crazy little thing called fucking outside Doesn't look good for me this year... chance of showers, about 43 degrees tonight. But I'll see if my wife is up for it anyway! And thus once again I fulfill my duty as the announcer of sexual holidays on this board. Get out there and fuck. __________________ I can't read your signature. Sorry. Last edited by Redlemon; 04-28-2009 at 10:30 AM..

05-01-2008, 03:50 AM	#2 (permalink)
Charlatan Getting it. Super Moderator Location: Lion City	The first of May is a public holiday here (labour day)... I celebrated by going to work. I don't know if I will be getting that sort of action. __________________ "My hands are on fire. Hands are on fire. Ain't got no more time for all you charlatans and liars." - Old Man Luedecke

05-01-2008, 12:19 PM	#5 (permalink)
snowy Kick Ass Kunoichi Location: Oregon	Yeah, it's still too cold for outdoor sex here. The weather didn't get the memo, I guess. __________________ If I am not better, at least I am different. --Jean-Jacques Rousseau

05-02-2008, 05:34 AM	#6 (permalink)
Redlemon Devoted Donor Location: New England	Last night was cold, damp, and my wife was crampy and not in the mood to receive. But, I got a boobjob* inside as a partial celebration, so not all bad. *Our preferred term for "tit fuck". It just sounds happer. __________________ I can't read your signature. Sorry.

04-28-2009, 09:50 AM	#8 (permalink)
Redlemon Devoted Donor Location: New England	Hey, I remembered to bump this thread before May 1st this time! I'd also like to share a song that we're working on in my singing group. "Ce moys de may, ce moys de may, ce moys de may, ma verte cotte, ce moys de may, ma verte cotte, ce moys de may, je vestiray. De bon matin me l veray, ce joly, joly moys de may. De bon matin me l veray: Un sault, deux saults, trois saults, en rue je feray, Pour voir si mon amy verray. Je luy diray qu'il me descotte; Me descottant le baiseray." It's French, from 1529, and translates to be much the same song as JC's: This month of May my green skirt (note: connotes "grass stained") I'll wear early in the morning, I'll rise in this lovely month of May one hop, two hops, three hops into the street I'll make to see if I'll see my friend I'll tell him to remove my skirt while he removes it, I'll kiss him. __________________ I can't read your signature. Sorry.

05-01-2008, 09:58 AM	#3 (permalink)
ratbastid Darth Papa Location: Yonder	lurkette is out of town, but StellaLuna and I have definite plans to celebrate. What's a little weird is... the first time I heard the song, I was in the car with Stella and her (now) ex-husband...

05-02-2008, 07:38 AM	#7 (permalink)
ratbastid Darth Papa Location: Yonder	Mission accomplished, over here.

04-28-2009, 10:08 AM	#10 (permalink)
ratbastid Darth Papa Location: Yonder	Everyone's going to be in town this year. Our First of May celebration will be a threesome.

04-28-2009, 03:03 PM	#12 (permalink)
lostgirl lightform Location: Edge of the deep green sea	I have to convince the SO, but I am totally down for this. __________________ We're about to go through the crucible, but we'll come out the other side. We always arise from our own ashes. Everything returns later in its changed form. - Children of Dune

04-28-2009, 03:47 PM	#13 (permalink)
Charlatan Getting it. Super Moderator Location: Lion City	Celebrating with a long weekend but no action as such. Not worth getting arrested and deported if we get caught. __________________ "My hands are on fire. Hands are on fire. Ain't got no more time for all you charlatans and liars." - Old Man Luedecke

04-29-2009, 09:10 PM	#15 (permalink)
JStrider Poo-tee-weet? Location: The Woodlands, TX	I'd be willing... if only I had a lady right now... __________________ -=JStrider=- ~Clatto Verata Nicto

04-30-2009, 06:16 AM	#16 (permalink)
Plan9 I Confess a Shiver	Oh, Jeebus Christi... I could have done without the f'n Snuggie reference. Now I'm going to be soft for a week and unable to fulfill the challenge in this thread despite the perfect opportunity. Thanks a lot, Will. Killed more boners than baseball. __________________ *Whatever you can carry.* "You should not drink... and bake."

04-30-2009, 09:07 AM	#18 (permalink)
lostgirl lightform Location: Edge of the deep green sea	Looks like I may not be able to either. My SO said it too cold in SF to accomplish such a thing. I am still going to try. __________________ We're about to go through the crucible, but we'll come out the other side. We always arise from our own ashes. Everything returns later in its changed form. - Children of Dune

04-30-2009, 11:16 AM	#19 (permalink)
Xerxys Junkie Location: My head.	Put's his game face on!!

04-30-2009, 02:39 PM	#20 (permalink)
Shaindra Psycho Location: Massachusetts	I'd love to join, but I recently split with my best option and I don't really feel like pulling any of the other options into rotation just yet. :-( __________________ "Never regret something that once made you smile."

04-30-2009, 11:24 PM	#21 (permalink)
Buk Addict Location: Seattle, WA	Thread Derail- Jonathon Coulton blows my mind like everyday is the 1st of May... (that sounded less gay in my head) My wife isnt too fond of outdoor sex, and I can't afford to get caught fucking someone else.

05-01-2009, 05:41 AM	#22 (permalink)
ratbastid Darth Papa Location: Yonder	Yeah, probably rainy here tonight too...

05-01-2009, 12:34 PM	#24 (permalink)
ratbastid Darth Papa Location: Yonder	I just emailed Jonathan that link... He should know.

05-04-2009, 12:25 PM	#25 (permalink)
Redlemon Devoted Donor Location: New England	Finally success for us. The rain stopped, and by evening it was a muggy 60 degrees outside. Not ideal conditions, but a couple of bathrobes and sandals was enough for the back deck. We're in a condo complex, so it was somewhat public as well. __________________ I can't read your signature. Sorry.

04-28-2010, 05:57 AM	#26 (permalink)
Redlemon Devoted Donor Location: New England	Bump for 2010. No opportunity for us this year, but hope it's fun for others. Please report back with good stories. __________________ I can't read your signature. Sorry.

04-28-2010, 06:37 AM	#27 (permalink)
snowy Kick Ass Kunoichi Location: Oregon	Saturday looks like it might actually be possible this year. No rain, partly cloudy, but only 59 degrees. I guess he can keep me warm __________________ If I am not better, at least I am different. --Jean-Jacques Rousseau

04-28-2010, 07:55 AM	#28 (permalink)
JStrider Poo-tee-weet? Location: The Woodlands, TX	Well I've got a girlfriend, and were going camping(with a bunch of crazy hashers) so I think I would be surprised if this didn't happen! __________________ -=JStrider=- ~Clatto Verata Nicto

04-28-2010, 04:44 PM	#29 (permalink)
Charlatan Getting it. Super Moderator Location: Lion City	I will raise a toast to all those who attempt with extra wish that you will not be in flagrante delicto (unless that is your aim). I am still in the land of exportation and caning (not the fun sort). __________________ "My hands are on fire. Hands are on fire. Ain't got no more time for all you charlatans and liars." - Old Man Luedecke

04-29-2010, 03:29 PM	#30 (permalink)
ratbastid Darth Papa Location: Yonder	We're working on it. We have a houseguest, but... she's very liberal. So who knows.

05-03-2010, 06:27 AM	#31 (permalink)
JStrider Poo-tee-weet? Location: The Woodlands, TX	success for my girl and me. Had a good romp in the woods at 1am saturday morning. and some in the tent later that day, not sure if the tent really counts, but its all good. __________________ -=JStrider=- ~Clatto Verata Nicto

05-03-2010, 06:51 AM	#32 (permalink)
bobby Super Moderator Location: 18,000+ posts on TFP #1,2,3,4 and 5,but I'm not counting!	I got mine thanks to "My Old Lady" and the trashy trailer....xoxoxoo __________________ "Life goes on,within you,and...with out you !" xoxoxoo Last edited by bobby; 05-03-2010 at 06:53 AM..