Questions for a Porn Clerk
 

Hey everyone. I'm new to the site. I received this suggestion from another member and thought it was a cool idea. As you can probably tell from my name, I used to work in a sex store. I thought maybe people could post their questions about sex toys and porn or even just ask me about my experiences working there. So feel free to ask away!

I have always wondered what an appropriate level of interaction with the clerks should be. You don't want to come of as the silent,trenchcoat-wearing creep and you don't want to be the "you will know far more about me than you ever wanted to know" creep either. What are the stories and where is the line?

What's the weirdest experience you've ever had in the porn shop?

I'd like to know the strangest order you've heard, and were able to oblige.

how does it feel to have an unlimited supply of porn inches from you :p

Who was the weirdest customer you ever served and why were they so weird?

How long until you became completely desensitized? Or, if not, what were the things in the store with which you never became comfortable? At this point, do you still like porn?

How many dildos did you try out and then repackage and sell??

*approaches counter, doesn't make eye contact*

Um, I was... I mean, a friend of mine, well, I mean not exactly a friend, but, like, you know....

*drops videos on counter, runs out of door*

Most of the clerks that work in a sex store are very approachable. I didn't like it when people came in and were completely shy. A friendly "hello" is always nice. As far as asking questions to the clerk, just make sure your question is genuine, like "do you have any videos starring Jenna Jameson?". One guy came in and asked me if I liked to look at porn, which was kind of pushing the line. We don't really like questions about our personal lives, just about the products.

Ok so several questions about weird experiences I've had. One time this guy came in and said he was from out of town. He asked me if we had any swinger magazines. At this time, I wasn't aware of what that meant so I asked him. He claimed to be a swinger himself and told me all about it. He obviously got the wrong idea because he thought I was interested in becoming a swinger, when really I just wanted to know what it was. He planned to be in my town for about 3 weeks, so he came in all the time when I was working and gave me information about swingers clubs and stuff. I politely accepted because I didn't want to be rude, but it was getting kind of creepy how he always came in on my shift. Then one night he came in with a gift for me. I opened it and it was a sex toy that he bought from another store! I was floored. I didn't know what to say. He was like "well I wish I could use it on you" which was kind of creepy. Then he left and I never saw him again. Little does he know I kept the toy :thumbsup:

There was a man who came in all the time and he was a cross dresser. He called himself "Julie." One day he ordered lingerie and a pair of high heeled shoes! Hey whatever floats your boat :p

Totally frickin' awesome! :lol:

This guy came in practically every day to rent porn. He was about 50 years old. He talked a lot to me, which I didn't mind because there usually wasn't a whole lot of work to get done. He admitted to me one day that he had a huge crush on me and make the effort to come in whenever he saw my car outside the store. Woa, can we say stalker?

It didn't take me long at all. In fact, I couldn't wait to look at all the products they had there. Whenever we got toy orders in, like vibrators and stuff, we had to test them to make sure they worked before they went on the shelf (and no, not test them in THAT way- mind out of the gutter please). I was so excited when an order came in because I got to play with everything!
After working at my job for so long, nothing made me flinch, not even the man who bought fake vaginas all the time.
And yes, I still love porn. Who could get sick of looking at naked people? :)

Ha ha. Believe me it was quite tempting to do so. Luckily though, I received a huge discount on the products (something like 80% off), so if I really wanted to take something home it wasn't to expensive. I also got free rentals for the movies too! Awesome! :thumbsup:

Did you ever have to clean out the "adult viewing booths"?

Lucky for me, there were no viewing booths at the place I worked. I have heard though that if it is the case the person working is required to clean it. Ick!

I just bought some condoms this evening. Now, you understand, I'm 50 and the clerk was about 20'ish. Why did she feel compelled to tell me the warming condoms feel good and the tingly, spearmint ones were "weird"? I didn't ask! Did I really look like I haven't bought condoms for 10 years? (I haven't) Are sex shop clerks mind readers?

We are just trying swinging. Is it written on my forehead? Maybe buying two dozen condoms and a couple glass dildos was a giveaway.

Reminds me of the time we met a couple from Ottawa in Westport. We were having so much fun getting to know each other. My girlfriend goes out for a smoke and the owner asks her if we're swingers!! Apparently, he is too. My girlfriend was kinda shocked!

How would you rate your overall experience working there? ....1 being your boss beating you with reeds while telling you that you're not good enough to run a lemonaid stand, and 10 being taste tester for Sam Adams....

Did you have a particular desire to work in a sex shop, or did you just sort of fall into the job?

And have you ever had to call the cops for anything?

Well we aren't mind readers thankfully :suave: but usually when we see someone poking around in a certain area, we may offer some useful suggestions. Many people are often afraid to ask questions so I found myself often approaching people to see if they needed any help finding something.

That's a funny story about the swinger thing. Luckily she probably answered yes otherwise he would have felt pretty embarassed!

I would have to rate it an 11. My boss was totally cool. We even spent time together outside of work.

Actually when I applied for the job, it was because my boyfriend dared me to. We were driving one night and we saw a huge sign saying that the store was accepting resumes. I was totally up for it because I thought it would be cool. My boss ended up interviewing me right on the spot and then asked me if I could start work that night!

I have never had to call the cops for anything. The town I live in isn't really bad for crime, although there were people who creeped me out!

I visited a boutique shop with two friends once, and the toys were displayed on glass display cases with soft lighting. The three of us left bug-eyed because we were so sexually naive, and we must have greatly amused the sales person.

I would love to hear about your stories of the neophyte clientèle. :)

What sort of store was it? You already noted that there were videos and toys, but no booths. Was it raincoater, couples-friendly, woman-owned, or what?

Also, you said you are no longer there. What led you to change jobs, and do you still get an ex-employee discount?

From reading your replies, I now realize that you're female. Did you feel like male patrons often avoided buying stuff because they were too embarrassed to be served by a female clerk?

Oh, and how much did you get paid?

Hah. Did you ever feel attracted to any of your customers?

Would you ask 'em out if the attraction was strong enough?

This thread: http://www.tfproject.org/tfp/showthread.php?t=105895, is discussing "Good" porn. You know; with high production values, attractive performers and non-degrading action? Something that offers more than the ol' in and out?

Any suggestions?

so funny I came into the sexuality forum to ask about porn... anyhow my wife and I last night watched porn for the first time (dvd rips downloaded) to test the waters before we go out and purchase some. so to me they where OK.. most of the girls where attractive and played with each other so that was exiting but it seems like for my wife she wanted to see some nice piece of meat taking care of good looking girl... she did say " we need porn with good looking people in it".. so what would you suggest?

Well I have tons of stories like that I could share with you but I'll just pick a couple for reading sake.

Many times I would have a whole whack of teenagers walk in the store when I was working. The minimum age in Ontario is 18 to be in an adult store. So I would ask them all for ID and most of them would just walk right out. Nice try guys! One time I also had some kid who was probably about 10 years old walk in. I was just like "Out...NOW!"

A lot of times guys would come in alone or with their girlfriend/wife, but when girls came in they were in packs. I've had many girls walk in and giggle at the stuff. Sometimes even to amuse them I will take toys out of the boxes to show them. I showed this woman a fake vagina one time and I thought she was going to pee herself laughing.

I had a lesbain couple come in a few times and they were fairly new to sex toys. I had to give them all kinds of suggestions on what to use keeping in mind that they are two women. The weird thing was that most of the time lesbians are rather masculine looking. These girls however were very beautiful and very feminine looking. I guess the word for it is lipstick lesbians. It was kinda hot actually!

It was a store that sells movies, sex toys, magazines, lubricants, condoms, gag gifts, lingerie, shoes, wigs, and books. We basically tried to accomodate something for everyone whether you are a man, woman, or couple. The movies were pretty diverse because we had every weird thing you could think of (except for animal porn because it's illegal in Canada).

The store I worked at is owned by a man, but a woman manages it.

It's funny though because even though we didn't have booths, it still had so many men ask to use the viewing room.

I worked there when I was getting my university degree. I don't work there anymore because I have now started my teaching career. I know the two really don't go together!

As an ex-employee I don't get as big of a discount, but I can usually talk my boss into giving me some money off.

I didn't really notice that any of the patrons were scared. I was always really friendly and tried to make them feel comfortable. A lot of men that came in were regulars too. I think some people have commented saying "oh you probably think I am a big weirdo for buying this." I always responded saying "are you kidding I have one of everything in this store!", which is really mostly true. :)

The pay wasn't that great. It was only minimum wage which was about $7.00 at the time. It was enough to have some spare cash in school, but I wouldn't say you could raise a family on that wage.

Yes I have to admit that some of the men that came in there were pretty attractive. Being human of course I checked them out too. I did have a boyfriend at the time (and I'm still dating him) so I never felt inclined to ask anyone out. Plus, my boss had a strict "no dating the customers" rule.

I would say that Valentine video makes a lot of nice couples videos where the guys aren't too bad looking. They are really good quality too and have lots of nice props.
Another way to simply see if the people are good looking is to look at the movie cover and the back of it to give you some idea. Generally if they are ugly on the cover they are going to be ugly in the movie.
Unfortunately though, the criteria they use to select the guy and girl are much different. For instance, it is a requirement that the woman is very beautiful. For the man, however, the looks don't necessarily matter. It goes by penis size and stamina. Most porn is made for men.
I would definitely try the Valentine video production company or go to a couples section at your local adult video store. Those are usually geared towards couples pleasure and not just mens. Don't be afraid to ask the clerk too because chances are they have seen a lot of the movies and might be able to comment on specific ones that they have available in the store at the time.
Hope this helps! ;)

jorgev asked a similar question. Go to an adult video store and look in the couples section for any videos made by the Valentine production company. They have a high budget and the people are good looking. I have rented many of these videos and don't recall ever being disappointed. When in doubt just ask the clerk because they've probably seen a lot of the videos that are available in the store!

Did you really see all that many lesbians to know whether they're typically masculine-looking? From what I've seen usually a lesbian that looks like a man is transgendered. Most lesbians I've met looked like women, not men. But I'm perfectly willing to concede the dozen or so lesbians I've ever met do not constitute a large enough sample size.

What was your best selling item?

I have a lot of gay friends. When I was in university I hung out at gay bars more than I did "normal" bars, so I've seen lots of lesbians. I would have to say that most lesbians have short hair, wear clothes that look sort of tom-boyish, and don't really do any feminine things like wear make up or nail polish. I would say that some of them are probably trying to pass for a man and some of them just look like tom-boys. Not all of them dress like this of course but the majority that I have seen do.

I would have to say the thing I sold the most of was this special cream that women use. You put a little bit on the clitoris and it gets you really aroused. It was like $30 for a small tube of it, but so worth it.

What is the name of it? :)

I have watched porn before but never rented it because I think I'd be so embarrassed to walk into a porn shop - more or less, depending on who was there and if the clerk was a man or a woman. What advice can you give me about overcoming this barrier? Did you have many women customers and how would they go about it?

it has occurred to me that the rise of the internet has increased the privacy of retrieving porn, at least in terms of face-to-face transactions. With this in mind, what is the draw of shopping at an adult store? Is it the fact that you can use cash? Is it that you can physically peruse a wide selection of titles and products before making a selection? Is there something about the act of shopping at a porn shop that is lost in the internet experience?

Does anyone actually come into the shop "just to browse"? It seems to me that one would only go to a porn shop with a specific purchase in mind. The concept of an "porno impulse buy" seems a bit odd, but I wonder how common something like that is.

there are some things that aren't available via an internet store such as magazines, books, newspapers, and discounted items. Also some of the outfits in some stores in NYC you can try them on, can't do that in an internet store.

My one and only browse through an adult store was pre-internet. My purchases were quite spontaneous and well received by my so. :suave:

I am afraid to ask what outfits you tried out cyn..:lol:

Hey! Give us a break. It was our first time.

Your experience is a lot more in line with mine. There is no typical look. I suppose I could say view my profile for a typical look, and that's actually not far off from the somewhat androgynous look many lesbians choose.

I'm not discounting your personal experience, but I do think it may be atypical because you are basing it on the gay bar scene. Gay bars tend to attract those who are more into lesbian as an identity rather than as a status, in other words, those for whom lesbian is who they are rather than what they are. Most gay people aren't that way, and tend to blend in pretty seamlessly with the mainstream.

There is a significant, very visible minority that do take on an overtly masculine look, some even with leather, buzz cut hair cuts, and so forth, while others, like me, tend to overcompensate in the opposite direction a little bit. Femmes just aren't as noticable outside the bar setting because they don't fit the stereotype.

There used to be a strong need to identify as either butch or femme but the trend the last decade or so has been to exchew any gender markers, masculine or feminine, in favor of just presenting as more neutral, or androgynous. At one point there was actually a bit of a backlash against femmes who were too feminine based on the assumption that we were endorsing societal stereotypes of women, but the freedom to be who you are has generally replaced that. The more common "androgynous" look has been dubbed "chapstick lesbian" after a joke Ellen Degeneres told regarding her status.

Lesbians do tend to skew more towards the masculine than straight or bi women, but there's still a good range, and the couple you describe aren't really rare. Most so called "lipstick lesbians", however, are really straight girls who've figured out that making out with another girl in public turns some guys on. It's about attention getting more than sexual identity, and it's really disappointing when you hit on them and find out they're really into guys.

Some butch lesbians do take on a very masculine look, but they're not actually trying to look like men so much as they're doing male drag--they typically want people to know that they're women who are very masculine.

Generally they're distinguished from true transmen (IE, female to male transsexuals) by beard and scalp hair. Transgendered men tend to take male hormones to stimulated male characteristics, which raises their DHT levels greatly causing beard hair to grow and scalp hair to fall out.

Gilda

since you aren't a visual person, let me help you with some visual examples...

<object width="425" height="350"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/zrhTw8HTetU"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/zrhTw8HTetU" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" width="425" height="350"></embed></object>

or one of these

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v1...hetiq/vilp.jpg

:thumbsup:

Yes, that's much more like what I'm used to. I agree that "androgynous", if anything specific, is a good way to describe lesbians in general. But even so, in my opinion they are typically distinctly feminine in appearance, unless they're transwomen. I do know a transwoman that does a pretty darn good job of looking like a woman. And I knew her when she was male. Transgendered people have it rough, I must say. A bit more so than straight gays or lesbians.

A lot of the women I've dated don't wear much makeup either, if any. I don't think that makes them any less women. But then I've always preferred the au naturel look. :thumbsup:

That explains why Skoga was up last night playing WoW until you were sleeping. :lol:

No questions, but wow Cynthetiq, I just know I'm going to think about that clip at a very bad time at work tomorrow and not be able to stop laughing. :lol:

How many (%wise) of the people in the shop appear like they're ashamed to be there (not making eye contact, sheepish attitude)? I mean, it's a porn shop, everyone's there for the same reason!

whats the biggest sale you made and what was in it?

how did you deal with shoplifters?
"hey you, put that vagina back!"

Cyn: "Hoooooooo!" :lol: Effing hilarious, man. Thank you for brightening my day. :lol:

I just wanted to reply that I do go into porn shops just to browse... in fact, that's usually what I enjoy most about porn shops! Now, I do NOT like male-owned shops very much, since they feel quite gross to me... but good female-owned shops that are clean, friendly, and informative... well, I could spend all day browsing there! (E.g. Good Vibrations or Babeland, for example).

Of course, as a female, my number-one purchases are not typically videos but dildos/vibrators and occasionally lube. All of the above are best purchased after trying them out in the store... :lol: Really though, many of the good places have all the vibes out on display with batteries, so you can turn them on and see how strong they are, how they move, etc. And there are lube "tester" bottles so you can at least feel their texture in your hand and see if you might like it.